


Moon of the Sun

by Hainegu



Category: Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: Agender Character, Androgyny, Angst and Drama, Blood and Gore, First Time, Genderfluid, Historical Fantasy, Multi, Slice of Life, Smut, They/Them
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-20
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:20:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 17
Words: 79,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24288052
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hainegu/pseuds/Hainegu
Summary: Once upon a night, an androgynous human was born and their name was Bae Juhyun of the Velvets. They always wanted to live among the stars in their beloved skies, but earthly life was merciless to them.This is a story of their heart. A story where Juhyun falls in love with the moon, where they suffer and fight for the piece in their soul.
Relationships: Bae Joohyun | Irene/Kang Seulgi, Bae Joohyun | Irene/Park Sooyoung | Joy, Bae Joohyun | Irene/Son Seungwan | Wendy
Kudos: 18





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Let's see if this goes well. I was not planning to post this as I started it just to see if I can write something long. But here we are now.
> 
> I'd appreciate comments.
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> HUGE GRATITUDE to my beloved and only beta-reader who stays with me and helps with this thing - to Peter Pan ^ 3 ^
> 
> Fictional ancient Korea with elements of modern society. Slice of life.
> 
> ! ANDROGYNY, gender bender, polyamory, strong language, smut, violence warnings. Mentionings of underage sex. !

**PROFILE**

**NAME**

| 

**Bae Juhyun**  
  
---|---  
  
**RACE**

| 

**The Velvet**  
  
**GENDER**

| 

**agender**  
  
**SEX**

| 

**None to morphing**  
  
**SEXUALITY**

| 

**omnisexual**  
  
**AGE**

| 

**Around 27**  
  
**HEIGHT**

| 

**Around 5’8”**  
  
**PROFILE**

**NAME**

| 

**Gang Seulgi**  
  
---|---  
  
**RACE**

| 

**The Velvet**  
  
**GENDER**

| 

**agender**  
  
**SEX**

| 

**None to morphing**  
  
**SEXUALITY**

| 

**omnisexual**  
  
**AGE**

| 

**Around 25**  
  
**HEIGHT**

| 

**Around 5’9”**  
  
**PROFILE**

**NAME**

| 

**Son Seungwan**  
  
---|---  
  
**RACE**

| 

**human**  
  
**GENDER**

| 

**woman**  
  
**SEX**

| 

**female**  
  
**SEXUALITY**

| 

**heterosexual|omnisexual**  
  
**AGE**

| 

**21**  
  
**HEIGHT**

| 

**Around 5’1”**  
  
**PROFILE**

**NAME**

| 

**Gim Yerim**  
  
---|---  
  
**RACE**

| 

**human**  
  
**GENDER**

| 

**woman**  
  
**SEX**

| 

**female**  
  
**SEXUALITY**

| 

**homosexual|omnisexual**  
  
**AGE**

| 

**16**  
  
**HEIGHT**

| 

**Around 5’2”**  
  
**PROFILE**

**NAME**

| 

**Bak Sooyoung (Joy)**  
  
---|---  
  
**RACE**

| 

**human**  
  
**GENDER**

| 

**woman**  
  
**SEX**

| 

**female**  
  
**SEXUALITY**

| 

**heterosexual|omnisexual**  
  
**AGE**

| 

**20**  
  
**HEIGHT**

| 

**Around 5’7”**  
  
## Chapter 1

A horse chariot was moderately moving along the threading pathway, jiggling with every rotation of the wheels, accompanied by a soft hoofbeat of strong and beautiful animals. The thick greenery of the woods seemed to bow in acknowledgement of their presence as they advanced into the openness slowly arising before them. Suddenly, a choir of calming whispers filled the space - it was a playful wind teasing the leaves with its warm touch. They always welcomed it, catching up with whatever game it was suggesting to play. It was not long this time as the wind caressed its new prey that rested on a straw spread of the carriage. 

It picked the black hairs from the heads and twirled them in some fancy dance known only to the spirit of it, but got tired soon, releasing the tresses and dissolving into the peeking beams of the rising sun. The star was as cheerful as always and archly tweaked the cheeks of two travellers who were peacefully sleeping in a cuddle. It was time for them to wake up as the new day had already started and demanded their attention. Yet, they were not responding to the touch. Little did they know of the obstinate side of the sun, that just started bathing them with its delicate arms, slowly but steadily taking off their sweet slumber.

The first one to move was the person clad in black and purple hanbok and mantle. A beautiful sleepy face appeared from under the hood, now completely lit by the yellowish hue of the early morning. Long black lashes fluttered and two different colours shone their way into the world - pink on the left and amethyst on the right. Dimmed by the mysteries of Morpheus Kingdom, the two eyes blinked slowly and drank in the view in front of them, followed by the streams of recognition flowing to the now awake mind. 

The face turned around and took a look at the man reining their vehicle, then returned to its original position and stared at the familiar features of the person lying in close embrace. Oh, how lovely and cute they were snoring quietly under the broad blue sky, completely unaware of the burdens that life bore. Touched by the image, pink and amethyst twinkled with warmth and softness as an affectionate smile appeared on the face. 

It would be nice to stay like this, hugging forever, but unfortunately, everything in this world was against it. A soft puff escaped its birthplace and flew into the air, now mixed with its infinitude. The person shifted and lifted themselves, disturbing the tight squeeze they just used to be in. Without any hint of waking up, another traveller retrieved the missing warmth with a bear-hug, pressing the surprised but deeply-happy-inside companion to their chest.

“Wmmn...” they hummed incomprehensibly, still asleep. You would never want to wake up such a placid creature, holding so fondly onto you.

Failing to find any will to resist, the awake person reciprocated the hug and stayed like that for some long blissful moments, until their back started to hurt because of the slightly uncomfortable position they were in. 

“Nnn… ‘tay like’is,” whined the sleepy one, when they felt the weight from their chest disappear.

“Ah, Seulgi-ya… My back hurts,” replied the muffled voice, lazily struggling to distance its body from the brownish clothes.

“That’s because you’re old, not ‘cause of my hug,” was the reply that instantly resulted in the pinch to the ribs of the speaker. “Aiya!”

“That’s for calling me old... This is for making my back hurt and these are for the future,” in the blink of an eye the pinching was mixed with poking and tickling, drawing squeaks and laughs out of the squirming body under the attack.

“Ai, Juhyun-ah! Yah! Kkk… Yah!” the laughing intensified as hands were flying all over the most ticklish parts.

The other voice joined in its soft laugh until both people were out of their breaths.

“I take my words back-k-k. You’re such a baby!” cackled the traveller, now completely awake and happy. They sat up and brushed their straight coaly bangs with gloved fingers, then fixed their gaze at the vis-a-vis. Seulgi’s eyes were of a different set of colours: the right one was orange while the left one - bright yellow. They shimmered with fun, narrowed in elegant crescents and crutched up with chubby cheeks that Juhyun had a soft spot for. Well, the whole Seulgi was a soft spot of Juhyun.

The latter sucked in the air, producing a sort of s-sound, ”I should have pinched you harder.”

Almost seeing Juhyun move, Seulgi smiled so brightly their face almost burst apart, then put their hands in front of their chest in a defensive pose, head shaking in denial. The former sniggered and shook their own head a trifle before diverting attention to the reining man who notified both fares about shortly coming to their destination point. 

The couple simmered down and spent the rest of the trip in comfortable silence. Juhyun fished some tightly involuted leaves of green tea out of the small wooden box, reposed in the fabric bag overby, and put them into their mouth, chewing slowly and thoroughly. Savoury bittersweet taste spread across their mouth, making them shut their eyes tightly for a second in great relish. 

“I’m still not getting it how you can enjoy those,” marvelled Seulgi as they watched their friend.

“Said someone who noshes everything that just remotely resembles food,” Juhyun fended off, long straight brow arching on their face, unamused. 

“At least I eat tasty food.”

“These are tasty. Much more flavourful than just brewed tea.”

Seulgi shrugged and stretched their lips forming a cute smile. They gazed past Juhyun, registering the buildings and people, appearing closer as they almost entered the town pale. The latter turned around and looked at the scenery as well, mind flooded with all the memories rushing in.

When the chariot stopped, the travellers went off on the ground, belted their swords back to their sides and picked up all of their belongings that were just a pair of bags. Juhyun paid for the services and a bit above, then the duo stepped into the thick of the town.

“Should we search for some new place to stay or go check on Joy?” asked Seulgi, their dark brown mantle waving with every soundless step.

“If she is still there. Five years have passed,” remarked Juhyun and cast an eye onto the junior. 

“I hope she is,” was the answer, seasoned with what seemed to be a tinge of excitement.

“S-s, yah, Seulgi-ah. You just want to jump her.”

“Don’t tell me you haven’t recalled her moaning into your perky ear,” Seulgi commented, unenthused by the straightforward cue.

“Well, I suppose we are going to check on her then,” concluded Juhyun, head full of flashbacks to some heated nights with the young girl named Joy.

As they entered the more populated parts of the town, the couple started drawing much more attention they’d appreciate. Not that they were not used to that, though. Wherever they appeared, people would always start watching them - some with interest and curiosity, others with a hint of fear, - since they were different from all of those gazers. 

Juhyun and Seulgi were the Velvets or of the Velvets as people would call them - anthropomorphous creatures with hairless skin that reminded the touch of the silk velvet. Besides, they were genderless and possessed no sex attributes all people had. They were called mutants for that yet many humans were fascinated by them. Mainly because the Velvets were extremely beautiful and appealing to everyone despite gender or sex. They were both feminine and masculine, their faces visually attractive from every point of view possible. They all had thick black hair of fabulous softness, most had it long as they were able to feel it unlike normal people, who just wore dead wigs on their heads. The eyes of the Velvets were two-coloured, fringed with curly lashes people rarely had. They all were of the average height: taller than most human females and shorter than most human males. Thus being said, the Velvets were considered as simply visual gods on this earth.

Nonetheless, their ethereal beauty and sex appeal was their curse. Many people wanted them, some just to touch, others much more than that. Previously, the Velvets had been held as slaves, but those times had ended quickly and long ago since their kind was evolving much faster than ordinary humans - the Velvets were faster, stronger, cleverer, and simply more than just humane. They had fought for their rights and freedom and now were either admired or feared. 

However, their nature was a wonder for humans. The Velvets existed with curveless bodies, that were triggered only with the sexual intentions of the others - they morphed according to people’s perceptions. That allowed them to have intercourses with both sexes, as their bodies would just transform in a second, ready for the act. And many humans used that to their advantage.

Juhyun sighed and gripped their fingers tighter around the strap of the bag. Still, being the Velvet was no easy thing in this world.

“Woah, everything looks different,” Seulgi exclaimed, as they forked to the narrow street, leading to the green park crowned with the household they aimed for.

“It does,” the elder replied, eyes flicking around in an attempt to restore the images of their memories.

High walls with red-brown ornaments at their tops were leading the duo to their stop. Tiled and rice straw plaited roofs curved out to the skies from behind the fences and prompted the sun to enter the space they guarded; to warm up the courtyards and move the chill of the night away.

“Do you remember those babies, Juhyun-ah? Do you think we will see them?”

“We will if they’re there,” they answered, though something in their chest throbbed at the question.

“I really hope they are okay. They must have grown up so much,” the taller Velvet continued, obviously affected by their thoughts of the past.

The pair walked silently with only their attires rustling subtly and Seulgi’s earrings ringing softly. When they came to the carved wooden gates, Seulgi pushed them open. The gates creaked plangently, yet invited the Velvets to the yard in front of a long main building. The place was quiet and it seemed no one was awake yet. The ravens exchanged glances and padded their way to the main hall, where all the events usually took place. They decided to wait until somebody would meet them.

It was not that long until someone finally entered the space. Seulgi was fast asleep, their head rested on the lap of Juhyun, who was tenderly caressing the junior’s hair. The elder was sitting with their back to the incomer, gazing absentmindedly at the leafage through the opened window.

“Oh, hello there! I am sorry we’ve made you w-”

The meek feminine voice trailed off as Juhyun jumped startled and snapped their neck to the subject speaking, the pair of eyes met and stuck on each other. 

“Ah, Seungwan-ah,” the raven broke an awkward silence, and a soft smile spread across their lovely face in recognition.

The young woman, whose name appeared to be exactly Seungwan, stood still at the entrance, her small frame frozen halfway through her bowing. Her eyes grew as big as the circle of the Moon when her mind registered the owner of those pink-amethyst pools looking at her. A wave of arctic cold washed over her but was instantly superseded by the hot one, her heart skipping a beat. She felt an urge to run up and embrace, but the remains of her good sense poke out and hold her back.

Suddenly, someone behind her gasped loudly and thumped up to where the newcomers were. Nothing was holding that person back, obviously.

“Unnie!” The yelp was so powerful, that Seulgi rocketed up from their doze, eyes wild and mind uncomprehending. The raven was instantly knocked over by a girl in her teens, who was almost strangling the former with her unbelievably strong hug. “You’re back!”

The bewildered look on Juhyun’s face was soon replaced with a kind one.

“And I? Am I still your unnie, Yerim-ah?” The elder asked with feigned umbrage in the voice.

“Oh, you are!” The girl extended her arm towards Juhyun and grabbed the latter by the neck, pulling closer to herself and Seulgi, forming a jumble out of everyone’s limbs. When she was done preventing the ravens from breathing, she let them go and kicked their arms. “You promised you would come back soon. But it’s already five years, you liars! I hate you!”

Yerim crossed her hands at her chest, pouting. Her brown hair was tied in a top bun, and she was so adorable, that Juhyun couldn’t help but patted the girl on the head.

“I’m sorry, Yerim-ah. We couldn’t have made it earlier,” they murmured with a mellow voice. “But we are here now.”

The elder watched Seulgi leaning in and enveloping the sulky girl in their characteristic bear-hug - a superpower no one ever resisted. Then Juhyun turned their attention to the still silent young woman standing exactly at the same spot as before. The raven stood up and floated towards Seungwan, who looked as though saw a ghost. The closer Juhyun was, the more her blood rushed away from her body. But then she almost felt like falling as the raven enclasped her in their arms, warmth emanating from their taller figure. Juhyun smelled like a forest on a rainy day.

“I’m happy to see you here. And I’m glad you are doing fine. Your sister and you look healthy,” quietly vocalised Juhyun and stepped aside, a soft smile on their lips.

“A hug for me?” A voice not belonging to any of the four people present in the room spoke. It seemed like the whole world was gathering here now; person after person.

Seungwan flinched, surprised and saw Sooyoung or better to say Joy literally twining herself around Juhyun without the slightest warning. If all of the previous hugs distributed in the room were those of close friends, the one Joy was giving right now was far from that. It was tight, intimate and suggestive.

“Joy,” the elder raven breathed out.

“Juhyun-ssi,” echoed Sooyoung with the most sultry tone she was able to muster, fusing into their embrace.

“Woah! Easy there!” Protested Seulgi, who was still glued to Yerim. The latter rolled her eyes and snorted.

“Oh, Seulgi-ssi, don’t be like that! You’ll get your cuddles later tonight,” Joy waved her brows teasingly at the raven bear, her full lips apart, revealing the perfect row of white teeth.

The junior Velvet seemed to catch on the allusion, yet a little after everyone else in the room. Even baby Yeri was quicker as her face scrunched in disgust.

“I hope you’ll stay?” Asked Joy, still enveloped in the strong arms of Juhyun.

“Yes, we will!” A quick reply from Seulgi filled the room, as they snuggled Yeri against the wall. “Yerim-ah hates me, I have to beg for mercy now.”

“That’s right. You must beg me,” the girl nodded vividly, a look of universal importance on her face.

“Very well! I’ll order the girls to prepare your rooms,” Joy said, detaching herself from Juhyun and turning around to leave. But then Seungwan uttered a declaration; she was finally out of her state of shock.

“I’ll do it, Sooyoung-ah. You stay,” she said, then bowed slightly to the guests and left the room.

She almost ran to the building where all of the working girls rested only to find herself spacing out, leaning on the wall and thinking about that duo that came back to this place after all those events they had lived five years ago. Her mind travelled back to Juhyun - they were even more stunning than before. And all her feelings she had been trying to repress over those 5 years erupted with a new force.

For some reason, she didn’t know how to behave now. She was not a 16 years old girl anymore and the Velvets were not the same either, but still, Seungwan felt exactly like that; like a teenager she once was - full of fears, uncertainty and desperation. She should calm down and sort out the knot of feelings swirling in her chest.

When Seungwan finally snapped out of her thoughts, she headed to the servants’ rooms, asking several girls to take care of the newcomers while she would make sure everyone here had a fine breakfast. 

***

Several hours later, when the ravens were fresh and clean after the bath, they gathered with the girls at the dining table. The Velvets were the only lodgers in this household now, hence everything was prepared just for them.

“So, you own this place now,” thoughtfully mumbled Seulgi before packing their mouth with all the food their hands could reach.

“Yes… And we are doing much better these days. You’ll see in the evening,” Joy said not bothering to particularise and put more of the pickled cabbage to Seulgi’s plate. “They all come for her, mainly.”

Sitting at the head of the table, Juhyun traced the gaze Sooyoung gave and attentively eyed the young woman to their right. Seungwan was unreasonably quiet ever since she had met them today and it was ruffling their feathers.

“What do you mean?” The elder asked as they kept tabs on the girl twiddling with her chopsticks.

“Seungwan unnie is our gem. Did you know she has the voice of an angel?” Joy answered, smiling fondly at the young woman across.

“Oh?”

“Stop talking about me like that. I’m sitting just right here, Sooyoungie,” mumbled Seungwan, embarrassed by sudden praises.

“Why? I’m telling the truth. The guests melt when Seungwan unnie sings,” Joy continued, disregarding the request of her unnie. “They keep requesting for her performances all the time. And our maknae has started working just recently. But I can tell she will be the next gem in our household.”

Yerim flashed her an annoyed glance and returned her attention to the meat. 

“Do you...sell yourselves?” inquired Seulgi, squinting disturbingly at the youngest girl, struggling with the fried flesh in front. The raven reached out for that piece and deliberately tore it with their chopsticks.

“How low do you think of us, Seulgi-ssi? We are not a brothel. We are a very much respected establishment. We provide a comfortable stay, good food and quality entertainment. 

“Our girls sing, dance, play instruments, read and amuse our guests. Many birds come to me from the streets and ask for patronage. I can’t take all of them, but for those who join... We are well-funded, so I can hire professionals to teach them whatever they need. It’s not like it was five years ago anymore.”

Juhyun carefully studied the face of the speaking woman to their left. Many things must have happened to her and this place, but it was nice to see everything was so far going well.

“But I don’t forbid the girls from sleeping with the men either,” Joy added after a while, drawing glances from both Seulgi and Juhyun. “I forbid sleeping with every one of them, but if I see the guest constantly courting the same girl, and she is not against, I let them. It costs much, though.”

The room fell silent. Even Seulgi stopped munching on their food, looking expectantly at Joy.

“Everyone here gets lonely one day or another, you know...” She murmured and put a hand on Juhyun’s wrist. Four pairs of eyes flung towards the touch, all filled with different kinds of emotions.

“No one is judging here, Sooyoung-ah,” crooned Juhyun softly, eyes meeting the dark browns of the woman beside. The Velvet really meant that. No one could and would ever judge the way these girls chose to live since their lives were no honey at all, especially in these times.

As to Seulgi and Juhyun, they were soldiers of fortune. Basically, they were selling themselves for whatever reasons just to survive. It was an ungrateful job, bloody and unquestioning, but it was well-paid and allowed both of the Velvets to live their lives relatively free. 

“You’ve become a conscious woman, Sooyoung-ah. If you are happy with what you do, I’m content,” said Seulgi with somewhat mentor notes to their voice.

“I will be very happy with what I’ll do later even, Seulgi-ssi. And you’ll be very content, I promise,” twittered Joy and nestled up to the raven to her left, hands coiling around them teasingly.

“Joy-ah, please! We’re at the table,” Seungwan groaned, diverting her eyes away from the couple.

“Yerim-ah, close your ears, I need to tell something to your sister,” Sooyoung replied with a devilish smile.

All exasperation of this world was plastered over Yeri’s pretty face when she unabashedly retorted, “Hell no.”

“This child!” Joy exclaimed jokingly and melted into Seulgi right after, who was more than just pleased with the action. 

The quintet resumed devouring the food, especially the Velvets, who famished for some solid rich meals. 

“How...long will you stay here?” queried Seungwan and was quickly looked upon. She blinked, eyes running from one face to the other. 

“We’ll stay for as long as it needs, Seungwan-ah,” Juhyun replied with no emotion at all, but their eyes bore holes on the younger’s face, making her squirm. 

“I didn’t me-”

“It’s alright not to be alright with some things. You just have to say that directly, Son Seungwan.”

“It’s... It’s not wha-”

“I think I’m full,” ended Juhyun, putting the chopsticks down with a slight smack. “Thank you for the meal. I’ll see you around.”

Without any second glance, the raven was up on their feet and out of the room.

The other four persons sat in such a silence, you’d hear worms multiply out there in the garden. The first to speak was Yerim.

“A very polite question to someone who had just come,” she popped her eyes out and pursed up her lips.

Seungwan looked at the couple across the table and felt like moulding into the ground. Seeing her frustration, Seulgi decided to light up the mood.

“I don’t know why Juhyunie got so offended but I know they will calm down and listen to you if you approach them,” the elder shot a warm smile.

Seungwan heaved a sigh, her short brown hair falling around her face as she bowed her head in perturbation. What would she say? She didn’t know as she was just feeling awkward the whole time.

“I’ll talk to them...later.”

“Sure. Just don’t droop, Seungwan-ah!” Seulgi cheered up and shifted their gaze to the youngest. “Yerim-ah, wanna show me around the town?”

“Will you buy me everything I want?”

“Look at this haggler!” Joy yelled, flabbergasted.

Seulgi chortled, “Everything you want!”

“I’m in,” concluded Yerim, already on her feet and ready to go. She swung her hands up in the air and dramatically encircled an imaginary figure, “I will show you the world!”

“Oh, be ready to spend a fortune for her world, Seulgi-ssi,” warned Seungwan with a small smile.

“Oh, be ready to spend a penny before you talk to Juhyun-ssi,” jeered Yerim as she shot a wicked look at her sister. She grabbed the Velvet by their arm and pulled them up.

“Just come back before everything starts! Yerim-ah, have you heard that?” Sooyoung interfered and freed Seulgi from her embrace reluctantly.

“We’ll be on time, Joy-ah,” assured the older raven and wreathed with an eye-twinkling smile. “Thanks for the food!”

Yerim yanked her catch off the hall and left the two young women in silence. Birds were chirping loudly somewhere in the park nearby while some valiant crickets ganged up on those plumaged beasts and chirred for their lives to steal the show.

Sooyoung cast a cunning look at Seungwan. The latter quirked her brows back at Joy, who shook her head and continued smiling to herself. 

“Whatever,” clucked Seungwan and got up, feeling even more uncomfortable under that strange gaze. The younger woman chuckled, also rising to her feet.

“In for a penny, in for a pound,” she said tangentially. 

“What does that suppose to mean?”

Sooyoung shrugged and left, a sly smile still playing on her lips.


	2. Chapter 2

## Chapter 2

“So, I was thinking,” gingerly started Yeri, head-to-toe draped in all sorts of candies and pretty-pretties, “is it okay that I call you and unnie, well, unnie? No one sees you like this, even Sooyoung unnie...”

Seulgi dug their teeth into soft rice patty and chewed, sweet red flavour covering the insides of their mouth.

“It’s okay. If it is comfortable for you.”

“But is it comfortable for you?”

“I don’t mind, Yerim-ah,” they said, and bumped a bit into the girl. “You are so thoughtful now.”

“I grew up if you haven’t noticed. I’m working now and everything,” pointed out the youngest with pride.

“I noticed,” Seulgi grinned. “What do you do?”

The couple was leisurely walking down the crowded street. Yerim had introduced the raven to every place possible in this town, simultaneously learning a bit about their life. The afternoon was well along, and the duo was sauntering towards the house as Sooyoung had enjoined.

“I write poetry and some songs for Seungwan to sing. She is really good with her voice. I was shocked to learn that!”

“I’ll have a chance to check that today. And you should recite to me. I’d love to hear that,” Seulgi purred.

“Yeah, whatever. I’m also learning how to play bipa now. When I’m good at it, I’ll go around the country with my music and songs. So you better keep in touch with me, I’ll be your last resort one day.”

“Oh, wow. Never saw this coming but I got it,” the elder chuckled, yet inwardly wondered about such a possibility. Not about Yeri becoming a swan, but about their life ending peacefully somewhere serene. With what Juhyun and Seulgi had been doing lately, that possibility shewed aerial.

Yeri noticed the elder being lost in the thoughts. 

“You have crumbs, unnie, let me kiss them away!” She jocosely posed, suddenly craning her neck and funnelling her lips at Seulgi.

The elder boggled, hands curbing the little monkey as they bent back and away. 

“Ha-ha! That’s too much, Yerim-ah-haha-” The raven giggled, now wriggling around the whole street, still being pursued by the girl who had even started to produce weird smacking sounds with her mouth.

“Come here, come here,” she intonated, eyes full of mischief and face beaming from ear to ear.

Seulgi was in convulsions when the duo entered the gates to their shelter. The bright yellowish eyes watered visibly as the raven was overwhelmed by mirth and could not hold the tears in. Yeri was cackling along, satisfied with the result her little ministration had led to.

“Yes, bowing is good manners, Seulgi unnie,” she patted the back of the raven, as they trundled their way passing the main hall to the inner square yard where the guest house was. Juhyun was sitting cross-legged at the porch in front of their room, a steaming cup of tea in their hands. They arched their brows in surprise at first but then smiled widely, watching the interaction of their dongsaengs.

“What’s that?” Juhyun asked, attention flowing between the two.

Seulgi brushed a tear and wigwagged a hand, unable to utter a word.

“Why? What’s the matter?” They sounded almost intrigued.

“Nothing, Juhyun unnie. Just cracked up,” Yeri said and perched herself near the older Velvet. “Has Seungwan unnie spoken to you yet?”

Juhyun gave a puzzled look and shook their head.

“No, why?”

“Nah. Has Sooyoung unnie showed you her dog?”

“She has… a dog here?” The raven was terrified and seemed to have difficulties even pronouncing the name of the animal. Thoughts of Seungwan talking to them evaporated.

“That creature is horrific, I’m telling you!” Yerim nodded vigorously as if she was trying to back up her words.

“I wish you had told me that earlier. I’d have looked for somewhere else to stay,” Juhyun was joking, but not really. Animals. Were. Scary.

“Nah. You stay here, the dog must go. Let’s create a strategy, unnie.”

A ripple of laughter rang around the inner yard as pink-amethyst eyes narrowed with glee.

“And we were not sure we’d find a job here. We’ve been recruited already, Juhyun-ah!” Chortled Seulgi and sat near Yerim, patting her knee.

“Ah, indeed!”

When the giggles faded the trio fell silent, gazing into space yet with soft smiles on their faces. This felt good. It felt like home. Even though there was a dog somewhere around the place, it still felt good, Juhyun thought to themselves. Besides, these people were kind to the Velvets, treating them well and being glad to see them. Well, not all of them - the raven sighed - as Seungwan was strangely awkward, but still. For the first time since ages, they felt tranquil.

Juhyun kissed the cup, sniffed and took a sip of warm liquid, keeping it a little longer in their mouth and probing with their tongue, then swallowed. The sensations spread along the chest to their stomach - it was fun to watch them as well as calming for no thoughts existed at that moment.

“I should go prepare myself for work,” mumbled Yerim, hopping off the porch. “Don’t be late, we start performing first, repasts after.”

“Mhm,” Seulgi hummed and watched the girl out of the sight with affection. “She grew up so much. Rather yesterday she was a baby, and now… She's become very beautiful. I bet she’ll bloom marvellously.”

“Aigoo,” Juhyun admitted under their breath, heart swelling with devotion and admiration.

“So, Juhyun-ssi, what have you been doing today? You left so abruptly...”

The senior cocked their ears at the appellation and instantly recognized Seulgi was nosing for explanation rather than being interested in their by-time.

“Nothing special, Seulgi-ssi. Simply meditated at the pond in the park,” Juhyun tried to duck the question for they didn’t want to discuss their loss of temper in the morning. The raven sipped the tea demonstratively, hoping their friend would not attempt to extract more.

“Oh, any fish there?”

Nice.

“Ah, yes. Quite a lot. You should go fishing one day.”

“I will. I promised Yerimie last time we’d go together,” Seulgi stretched themselves strongly and stifled a mighty yawn. “I’ll take a nap. Wake me up.”

“Eung,” purred Juhyun and returned to their contemplation.

The sun was slowly setting and painting the surroundings in toasty colours, invoking even deeper relaxation in the raven, who slumped further into the porch. Taking one last sip of cooled tea, Juhyun put the cup away and rubbed their hands. Those gloves were getting on the nerves and the raven decided to take them off, then ran their fingers through the hair in silent sensorial delectation. 

In fact, the Velvets were much more susceptible to physical contact . Some people even believed that the Velvets were born for humans' sexual enjoyment as those both received and gave the greatest pleasures possible. Well, people always thought they were the hub of the universe. But you couldn’t throw the words out of the song - the Velvets rightfully were a total jam of intimacy. 

Juhyun stroked their hair up, then took a bunch and breathed in the scent - fresh and earthy as always. For most people, it would sound strange, but the Velvets didn’t do human sex among themselves, since they perceived each other as themselves and did not morph private parts. They didn’t need that. Their intimacy was based on simple kisses and caresses - petting in its pure form. That was enough for them to reach their bliss, yet with people, they were doing people thing, and it was wonderful in its own way.

The raven tilted their head and let the tresses fall to the other side of their body. For some reason, everything right now felt so glorious, Juhyun got slightly aroused. Maybe it was the tea, maybe their touch or maybe that human, hiding at the corner of the building and watching them covertly. The raven usually was rather attentive and did not fail to notice things happening around even while enjoying themselves. It was impossible to recognise the person, though, as they were pretty far from Juhyun, but they were there and it was fun. 

After the Velvet was done playing with the hairs, they lay on their back and watched the sky, harking to the songs of the birds afar. They were prattling sweetly as if they were trying to convey to each other that the sun would soon go down, and they needed to spend the rest of the daytime fruitfully. The sky was crystal clear and it almost hurt to look at it, yet Juhyun continued as they narrowed the lids a little to ease the burning. Would anyone ever know what there was above that blue vault? Was there anything at all? Maybe if you flew… No, that would not work as Juhyun was scared of the heights. There had to be another way.

The raven caressed their wrist absentmindedly with the other hand. Should they buy a bracelet? They had been wanting one for a very long time. Perhaps, Juhyun could inlay it with amethyst - a symbol of peace and sincerity. Yes, that would be nice. They needed to find a goldsmith then.

“Bae Juhyun-ssi?” Spoke a humble voice.

So, it had been her all the time.

Juhyun turned their head to the young woman standing several steps away. Her yellow dress undulated gently under the touch of the wind, and her eyes were meekly fixed at the wooden porch beneath the raven. They watched her curiously for some time before answering.

“Last time you called me oppa.”

“I’m...sorry for the morning miscommunication. I didn’t mean to be rude. I posed the question wrongly,” Seungwan blazed away. She had been practising her apology.

“Does that mean you won’t call me oppa anymore?” Asked Juhyun, whose eyes were back to the sky. 

“That means I am sorry for implying the wrong perception.” Dodging again.

“Did I do something wrong that you unhorsed me from being oppa to distant Bae Juhyun-ssi?” Their voice was calm and soft yet dusted with a bit of confusion. 

Seungwan was holding her ground as if her life depended on that.

“Please, accept my apology and let me go,” she pleaded with extreme politeness to her tone.

“Will you call me oppa again if I forgive you?” Juhyun rested themselves upon their elbow, now facing the young beautiful woman standing in a civil pose.

Her eyebrows twitched and a gust of wind tumbled her short brown hair. She was strangely compelling and Juhyun unexpectedly found themselves making sheep’s eyes at her. 

“I will not call you like that any more,” she surrendered, a somewhat painful expression on her face. 

The raven pouted, then puffed out their cheeks.

“Why?” 

Seungwan blinked once, twice, but kept her mouth tightly shut as in fear of spilling the beans. 

“Aigoo...” The raven sighed and laid down on the porch again, eyes closed. “At least don’t call me so formally. Juhyun-ssi will be just fine. And you have nothing to be sorry for. It’s not your fault I misinterpreted your words.”

Seungwan said nothing, nor did she go away. Juhyun peeked at the girl with the amethyst eye. 

“You can go now. If you want,” they said and resumed to darkness under their lids. “Or sit with me for a while. If you want.”

Seungwan was in the midst of an internal war of nerves. On one hand, she wanted to accept the invitation and sit beside Juhyun, but on another one - she was afraid and she didn’t know why. Juhyun should be the last person she must fear as they had saved her five years ago and provided everything for her and Yerimie so that they’d live a decent life. 

A deep voice snapped her out of her daze.

“I appreciate your silence but I’d enjoy you talking to me, Seungwan-ah. I know you can talk well and much,” Juhyun sat up and patted the space to their side. “Come?”

The girl puffed and moved, placing herself at the edge of the porch, feet on the solid ground. She noticed Juhyun turned to her with all their body and instantly regretted her decision. There was no need to look at her for so long, although she wanted to do the same towards Juhyun as they were simply enchanting. Especially those eyes, sharp and clear, powdered with a blob of claim - in other words, hard to resist. Yet again she felt like a teenager she once was and it was driving her up the wall.

“How have you been, Seungwan-ah?” The raven asked quietly, observing the girl. 

“Fine,” - she answered and a moment later added - ”and you?”

“Fine,” mimicked Juhyun with a lopsided grin. She was not looking at them even out of the corners of her eyes and was noticeably tense.

“Good,” nodded Seungwan and seized the brink of the porch with both hands. “Are you going to watch the performance today?”

“Do you want me to?” Juhyun fiddled with the hem of their shirt, then suddenly put their hand on top of Seungwan’s. “I’ll come if you sing. Will you?”

Was it the first time she felt their skin on hers? Definitely, and it was unearthly and strange.

“I...will,” Seungwan confirmed when she was able to concentrate on more than just the touch. Yet before she could stop herself, she mused, “It’s so soft...”

“What?”

“Your hand,” the girl swung her head and looked at it, then shifted her eyes to Juhyun’s face. “Your skin is so soft.”

“That’s what they say,” the raven smiled kindly and feathery pinched Seungwan’s nose, who apparently was not prepared for the gesture and therefore congealed into the statue. While the latter was puzzled, Juhyun managed to interlock their fingers with those of the girl and now was plainly chuffed with the result. “It feels bizarre, doesn’t it?”

“Oh, yes, it does,” Seungwan breathed out, captivated by the handsomeness of the face in front. Would it have been easier for her to regard Juhyun not as a man, but a woman? Probably not. Having Juhyun before her very eyes was not an easy task at all.

“For me as well, every time I touch someone and not myself,” the elder tickled her palm with their thumb. “Doesn’t it feel like a fabric of some sort? They call us the Velvets for a reason...”

“It doesn’t,” Seungwan brushed her fingers against the raven’s skin. “It’s velvety but not entirely velvety, not as a fabric. Just...extra soft and...pleasurable...”

“Mhm.”

Juhyun watched the girl’s hand closely as it fitted perfectly into their own. They forgot when for the last time they held someone like this.

“By the way, your sister exhausted my friend,” the raven chuckled. “And she was literally covered with stuff! Have you seen her?”

“Not yet,” Seungwan smiled back, sympathising with Seulgi as she knew Yerim could be quite demanding.

“Maybe, you could show me around as well? I guess the town has changed, and I need to find a jeweller. We can spend some time together, too.”

“Sure,” the younger nodded. “Why do you need a jeweller?”

“I’d like to craft something,” was the only answer Juhyun gave as they rubbed their fingers against Seungwan’s hand again. The raven had been rather touchy before as far as the young woman remembered, yet it was something she would never get used to.

“J-Juhyun-ssi, I must go now,” Seungwan started softly. “I have to get ready.”

“Of course,” Juhyun lazily unhanded her and slumped back onto the porch.

“Don’t sleep. You’ll miss everything,” the woman said jocularly as she left her seat. “And I will not perform again even if you ask me.”

“Ne~” they piped and listened to diminishing steps. 

Now everything seemed to be so unbelievably good.


	3. Chapter 3

## Chapter 3

Seulgi and Juhyun were sitting at the farthest table in the corner of the room with their backs turned to its centre; fresh air moving in through the window nearby. This way, they drew as less attention from the men filling the space as possible. Some girls were already bustling about the room, making sure all the guests were content with whatever they wanted. As far as the ravens understood, they’d have several rounds of performance mixed with time for eating, chatting and simply chilling. Joy believed that this was the best way to keep the guests entertained throughout the evening.

Apropos of the young woman, she was moving from table to table with a soft smile, talking about something with her guests and paying all the attention to each of the men. She was relatively caressive, sometimes teasing and gallivanting — absolutely piquant. Joy was on her own ground here and she led all those men by the nose.

With a corner of their eyes, Seulgi and Juhyun were watching Sooyoung with great savour and deep admiration. She changed so drastically since the last time they met and it was the best change ever.

“My loves,” she cooed to the Velvets when she finally reached them and knelt at the pillow. “I’ve told my girls about you, so do not hesitate to interact and ask for anything you’ll need. Some of them will be obviously intrigued, so just remember you are my guests, not theirs.”

She poured the most charming smile onto them and caressed their wrists resting on the table, then left.

“Now I genuinely want to see her angry and jealous, and on me,” mumbled Seulgi to themselves.

“You said something?” Juhyun tossed their brows up, head turning back to their friend.

“No, you auralized,” the younger answered and the other raven scowled for a second before gazing out of the window. It was dark outside, only lanterns oozed soft light around the yard.

Juhyun was not a big fan of such events. They preferred more private and intimate amusement, ideally with people they knew well. And somewhere spacious like a park or a seaside. That pond they had visited today was perfect, by the way. Juhyun would return there soon, maybe even later this night.

Their attention was diverted by the sounds of gayageum as one of Joy’s girls started playing the strings. Her hand movements were precise and elegant, nimble fingers plucking strongly and quickly, producing a mercurial brook of sounds. The girl was clad in a yellowish hanbok scattered beautifully around her as she was sitting on the floor with the instrument carefully placed on her lap. 

Juhyun sensed the strings of their heart resonating with the ones of gayageum — it was the first time since forever they heard any music. The raven glanced at Seulgi and in a split-second was met with bright tigerish eyes, squinting warmly at them. Juhyun smiled back and squeezed the younger’s hand, soon returning to listening. Everyone was mesmerised as all the heads just were facing that girl.

Unexpectedly, Juhyun found themselves enjoying the whole night. It was filled with more music, delicious foods and liquor, light dancing of lithe women, flirting, soft touching, and the feature of the show — Seungwan.

She was in light blue attire, embroidered with flowers on the upper part, sitting demurely near the other girl who accompanied her. And omona... Seungwan was transcendent. Her voice — ambrosia in its pure form and Juhyun felt like being struck by a lightning. They did truly believe Sooyoung when she had said Seungwan was the gem, but it was an understatement.

When the music of the spheres was over, Juhyun could not think about anything except that young woman, who was out to the public, conversing. The raven was feeling some sort of attachment ever since they had helped the girl and her little sister out, but there was something else in their heart. And Juhyun wanted to explore it.

“How do you like it, Juhyun-ssi?” Joy asked into their ear, her body plastered to the older raven’s arm. The way she breathed out the honorific sent shivers down Juhyun’s spine. She was sitting between the Velvets and did her best to amuse both of them. Oh, yes, she knew what she was doing.

“I was not expecting any of this, frankly speaking. Now I understand why you are so popular,” Juhyun answered and witnessed Sooyoung melt with gratification. 

“Your pleasure is my pleasure,” she vocalised, watching from under her lashes.

“S-s, ah, Sooyoung-ah,” Juhyun sucked in the air along with peeking at the people behind, then turned back. “Aren’t you a little bit provocative? There are many other guests that would love you to pay attention to them.”

“I’m untouchable here, they can desire me however they want. They know I sleep with only whom I want,” Joy murmured and her hand landed gently on the thigh, Juhyun’s thigh.

“But you are not sleeping with me tonight.”

“I remember. I just love to tease you, Juhyun-ssi,” her breath on their skin was searing.

“Ah, you do,” Juhyun sharply stiffened the naughty hand that had crawled higher to more private parts. Thank spirits they were covered by the table. “Stop arousing me.”

“Yes, stop that and arouse me instead,” Seulgi put their ungloved hand on Joy’s forearm, waiting for a reaction.

Sooyoung smiled slyly and cast one more sultry look at Juhyun, then moved away from them to press her bosom to Seulgi’s side, her hand flying over the naked velvety palm.

“You are exigent now, and I hope you’ll be lavish with me later when I arouse you to the skies,” she made several upward stroking motions on Seulgi’s thumb with the tips of her fingers. Ooooh. 

“How long” — husked the tiger, thus far ready to jump their prey — “should I wait.”

This time it was Joy who felt jimjams all over her body. Yet she had to maintain herself.

Sooyoung brought the naked hand closer to her lips and brushed them against soft skin, “Just a little bit longer.”

It was so fun to watch those yellowish eyes dig into her face, all sorts of dirty thoughts flashing behind them. And so, so kindling. 

She asked, “Will you wear your bell earrings for me? I want to hear them jingle.”

“I will wear you and you will ring for me till Kingdome come,” strained out Seulgi through gritted teeth. They were ablaze. 

Joy smiled knowingly and stung the older raven on the finger with her tongue.

Juhyun sniffed and smirked, watching the interaction, but then decided to give the pair more space. The elder half-turned to them with their back and raked the whole room with their eyes. There was the maknae, listening to some young men talking animatedly, then that pretty girl-dancer, admiring some middle-aged man, and oh…

She was looking at them when Juhyun found Seungwan in the crowd. The girl diverted her eyes to her company, but then flashed a glance again. Her lips curved into a lovely smile as she tilted her head to the side, then covered her mouth with a hand, positively laughing, although Juhyun was not able to hear it. Why was she not coming up to them? Should Juhyun go to her instead? They had so much to tell her about her voice.

No, that would not be a good idea. Those men would perceive them as a woman, and they did not want that. Juhyun would wait and if a perfect opportunity comes…

Just right about now, when those brown smiling eyes caught sight of them - wink! With the other eye, dumb-dumb, they scolded themselves, recalling they could not wink with the right one. Juhyun struggled for a bit but managed to perform a sort of wink, then smiled a sigh of exasperation. It worked though, because Seungwan’s face wreathed ever so brightly, eyes twinkling funnily. She looked at the duo behind Juhyun, then returned her gaze to the elder raven, who was clever enough to catch the meaning. They stood up and sneaked out of the room.

Seungwan appeared several minutes later, her long skirt soughing with every movement. She came closer to Juhyun standing under the tree, where fewer people would notice them from the open hall. A small lantern was shining on the couple from the ground.

“You need to practice more,” was the first thing she said, voice full of mirth.

“S-s, I will try, but can’t promise. My muscles don’t listen to me,” they almost whined yet with a giggle, threatening to escape their lips. “Was I that pathetic?

“Oh, no, not at all. You were cute,” Seungwan trilled with laughter ─ a delight to hear.

Juhyun held out a hand and waited for the girl to accept it. She did, though, a bit tentatively.

“I fell in love with your voice, Seungwan-ah,” the raven said, enraptured. Their eyes were almost not visible due to the shadows, yet the woman felt the warm gaze.

“Thank you, Juhyun-ssi,” her voice was shy, and most likely she blushed.

“I flapped all my ears!”

“As far as I know you have only two,” archly noted the girl.

“Ah… I’ll grow more for the next time, then,” Juhyun laughed and Seungwan smiled sweetly. After a while, the raven asked, “Why didn’t you come up to our place?”

“Sooyoung-ah kept you company,” she stated.

“And you didn’t,” the raven squeezed the girl’s hand. It was warm and soft even through the fabric of the gloves. “Come to us next time.”

Seungwan smiled politely and turned her face to the side, looking at something. A twinkle in her eye appeared as the lantern lighted up her face - it elongated a little as she matured, and she became even more beautiful. 

“Seungwan-ah.”

“Yes?” She focused back on Juhyun.

“Seungwan-ah.”

“Yes!” She smiled but stilled as the raven came closer, their eyes visible and clear, and gazing at her. She could never forget them, for she saw those colours almost every night in her dreams.

The last time the girl watched Juhyun this close was the day they had left her. That day she had realised she liked them.

“I’m thinking about stealing you now. Will you be against it?”

“...No.” 

Of course, not. They could take her anyplace.

“Good. Let’s go,” Juhyun started dragging poor woman as if someone was trying to rob them of her.

They picked up one of the lanterns and headed straight to that place they had taken a fancy to.

“Where are we going?” Asked Seungwan, getting a little nervous all of a sudden.

“The pond. I’ve been there today and I liked it. Much more pleasant now than 5 years ago.”

“Oh,” she knew that spot. It was deeper into the park, they only needed to pass all the buildings first. “I can’t see anything.”

“That’s because it’s dark, Seungwan-ah,” the Velvet voiced and pulled the girl to themselves, smiling as they heard the younger snorted. “Keep closer.”

Seungwan obeyed for she had no other choice. One lantern was not enough, and she wondered how Juhyun was able to guide them with so little light.

“I’m usually terribly bad at orientation, but this was not hard to remember.”

“How do you do your job then?”

“Seulgi is skilled in tracking, they do that chore and I do the other,” they answered pensively.

“The killing...” Seungwan whispered as her thoughts went several years back to one deadly night.

“Yes, killing as well,” Juhyun stopped. “Are you afraid of me?”

“No,” she confided quietly.

“I won’t do any harm to you or Yerim-ah. Neither will Seulgi. You are our family.”

“I know,” Seungwan pressed her hand to Juhyun’s arm. 

She was not afraid of them. It was a devout gratitude she felt as they had bestowed her a new life.

Flashback start

_It was the end of the war. Seungwan was 16 and Yerim was 11 when their town was assaulted for the last time. They were helping their mum with cooking, and their father was repairing something in their yard. He was not suitable for the service, thus he was doing anything he could to help ─ mainly mending armours._

_When he ran into their kitchen with wild and terrified eyes, they knew something serious had happened._

_“Gather the girls and hide as well as you can!” He yelled, storming to the other room where his sword was._

_Seungwan eyed her mother, who lost the colours and was entirely white with fear._

_“Yerim-ah, come here!” The woman ordered as she took both girls by their hands and guided them out of the house._

_She hurried towards the other building and skirted around, where a socket was. Their heating system was placed there, and the woman believed this was far and deep enough to conceal two little girls._

_“Stay here no matter what. Do not come out, do not utter a sound and just don’t move until your father or I come back. Do you understand?”_

_Seungwan nodded and pressed Yeri close to herself as they hid at the socket, eyes watering and heart beating feverishly with dread. They did not know what was happening and why they had to hide, but they knew it was because of war._

_“I love you,” their mother said to them and disappeared around the corner._

_Those were the last words they heard from her as she never came back. Neither did their father. The girls spent the whole night sitting quietly in a tight embrace. Tears were streaming down their faces, yet they did not drop a single sound._

_When an unknown man appeared at the corner, the girls even stopped breathing. They prayed for him not to notice them, yet the fate turned their back on them that night._

_The man clawed them out of the socket and the girls yelped loudly. He dragged them to the yard but failed to contain them as they were struggling for their lives._

_“Run, YERIM-AH!” The older girl shrieked as she pushed the man with all the power she possessed and rushed in a different direction._

_With a corner of her eye, she saw her sister escaping the yard out to the street. Seungwan was on her way to the other exit when she tripped. With a low grunt, she fell on the ground and hissed at the sharp pain, spreading across her knees and arms. She turned her head to see what caused her to fall, and her blood turned._

_Her father was lying there, eyes wide open and popping out of the skull, his tongue hanging out of his mouth, covered in blood. His whole body was a bloody pool._

_She did not scream. She couldn’t as her throat shrank, almost throwing up. The girl felt her stomach retching even harder when she noticed herself being covered in her father’s blood. The time stopped for her, but not for the people around._

_The next thing she knew was a painful grip on her hair. The man pulled her up and kicked onto the street, telling the other man ‘to take care’ of her._

_Seungwan tried to get up but received a blow to her abdomen, and then she was pressed down on her back by a heavy body. He smelled of sweat and blood and piss, and his hands rummaged about her skirt, raising it to her chest while he pushed her legs apart with his knees._

_She was feeling dizzy of all the pain and fear she felt, and her strength started to fade away as well as her fighting back. Seungwan got a sound slap to her face and the world almost went dark when suddenly the man stopped moving and fell limp on top of her. Something warm leaked on her chest, and when she was able to see again, she noticed a yawning cut to the man’s neck. His head was off._

_The girl couldn’t move, her whole body was frozen, and she stayed like that, hearing people screaming, metal clinking, fire burning; her bones were soaking with man’s blood. Someone set the neighbourhood on fire, including her own house, where her mother probably was. Her beautiful mother with the softest hands in this world, the kindest heart, the sweetest voice… She would never tell her how much she loved her. She would never hug her father’s tall frame and sense his fresh scent. She would never see them again. Ever._

_Her heart felt like it would burst apart, it was cut live as she was deprived of her parents in a spun of several minutes. She felt she was crying out blood, not tears._

_Her sister screamed. It stubbed Seungwan straight into the chest. Yerim-ah ─ her lovely beam of light, her little turtle ─ was wailing. Everything was so unbearable._

_The body was moved away from her, and she saw pink and amethyst approaching her. Had she died already? Were those angels coming for her to take her to the family? Because that face looked like it belonged to an angel. An angel, covered in blood._

_Seungwan felt strong hands picking her up, and she felt like flying. An angel with beautiful eyes would take her with them, and she’d meet her parents again._

_“UNNIE!!!” Yerim bawled out, almost in hysterics. She was blubbering, choking on her tears, but she was safe. Another angel saved her._

_They would be together again, Seungwan’s last thought was ere she fainted._

Flashback end

Seungwan was sitting on Juhyun’s overcoat that they had put down on the ground. The latter was resting beside her, stargazing. They had been quiet for some time already, but silence between them was never a problem. Juhyun preferred listening and Seungwan… Seungwan was still not sure of how to behave. Being around Juhyun was tougher now.

“Juhyun-ssi?” The woman began.

“Eung?”

“Would you come with me to visit my parents?”

The raven got up and sat very close to the girl. She was able to feel the warmth of their body and the earthy smell of their hair. They took her hand with both of theirs, entwining their fingers and caressing softly.

“If you want me to, I will,” Juhyun answered in a deep voice.

The girl hummed in response, her mind cleared of thoughts as the raven was gently stroking the outer side of her hand. It was a very pleasant sensation, and also calming.

“Let’s go back?” They asked. 

“Could...we stay a little longer?” 

A smile graced Juhyun’s lips. 

“Yes,” they purred and attentively studied the girl. Her gaze had changed ─ it was more conscious, more confident and wonderfully soft as if she shed honey every time she looked at something. When Juhyun had met her she had been a tender shoot, but now she was an exquisite orange blossom ─ pure, innocent and precious. It was impossible not to feast one’s eyes on her. 

Amethyst and pink eyes travelled down to the woman’s parted lips. They curved so lovelily when she smiled and pouted, and moved so delicately when she spoke or sang.

“I like your voice, Seungwan-ah,” Juhyun whispered as they adored the girl who smiled at their words again. “I’ve never heard you singing before.”

“I started learning after your departure. One woman ─ she’s no longer here ─ taught me and I’m grateful for that. I truly love singing,” her calm and mellow voice flowed into the raven’s ears and directly to their soul. “It’s the only thing I will never stop doing, I believe. Although I’m not sure how long I’ll be able to work here, I hope I can find a way to continue singing when I’m older.”

“I am glad you found something you love in this life,” the Velvet’s eyes gleamed with fondness. 

“And I’m glad you came back,” she said almost inaudibly, yet Juhyun caught that and felt their heart pounding in their chest.

They brought her hand to their lips and kissed her fingers faintly.

“I realized a pond was missing something, so I decided to return,” joked the raven and watched Seungwan’s reticence changing into a weak smile. “Now I can sit near it with you.”

Butterflies soared inside the girl, and she felt her eyes watering and cheeks flushing. If only Juhyun knew how much she had been waiting for them. Maybe… Maybe, she would try to tell them one day. 

“Let’s go, Seungwan-ah. I’m getting cold and, probably, you, too.”

“Ne,” she murmured, burning sensations spreading from the spot kissed a moment ago.

The way back was silent, but Juhyun’s grip on her hand was loud. When they reached the guesthouse, they heard nothing except distinct moans coming from Seulgi’s room. Obviously, the event was over and the couple finally found bliss in each other’s arms.

Juhyun sighed audibly with a soft smile.

“Ah, I suppose that’s my doom tonight.”

“Sorry,” the girl said, feeling extremely out of place.

“Seulgi really looked forward to meeting Joy. I guess I can forgive them for their loudness.”

“And you?” Rolled out of the woman’s tongue before she could manage herself.

Juhyun pondered for a minute.

“Not that I haven’t thought about her… She is joy, after all-”

“Have you thought about me?” Seungwan was definitely experiencing some boldness explosion. Though, she added quickly, “Or Yerimie...”

The raven took a lengthy look at the girl. She was fidgeting a little and was not meeting their eyes ─ likely, she was uncomfortable with erotic sounds. A warm smile spread across the elder’s face.

“Of course, I was thinking about you and Yerimie, Seungwan-ah. You should go now. I am sure they will not finish soon,” Juhyun put a hand on her head. “You did well today. Go rest.”

The junior hummed. Deep inside, she wanted to stay, wanted them to take her somewhere else and keep her company so that she could see, hear and be with them more. But she felt dispirited. It’d be better to go.

“I’d love to hear you sing more often,” the raven chanted in a low velvety voice as they stroked the woman’s hair. “Go now...”

“Good...night,” she breathed out before leaving; a feeling of Juhyun’s caress still lingering on.

“Good night, Seungwan-ah.”


	4. Chapter 4

## Chapter 4

The following weeks were pretty ordinary for Seungwan except of the fact she had to watch Sooyoung literally hanging on Juhyun. Even though it was easy to tease and arouse the elder raven, getting them laid was a task to complete. 

Of course, Joy was never the one to lose heart; she was consistent, determined and sometimes even brazen. Eventually, she won the game ─ Seungwan witnessed them in the hall, in the daytime. Sooyoung was in Juhyun’s lap, her shirt open and skirt down to the waist as she was rocking slowly while pressing her lover’s naked hands to her breasts.

The other time they were spotted in the backyard, though in the early morning. In such a way Joy decided to set up Juhyun’s mood for the whole day ─ gently sucking them off under the broad tree. Judging by the expression on the Velvet’s face, Sooyoung was doing very, very well.

Nothing of that was Seungwan's business, yet she was getting displeased. Her own relationship with both Velvets was developing quite good whenever they had free time from their jobs. Seulgi treated the younger girl in a friendly manner; they spent much time together with Yeri, creating a new type of bond among the three of them. And Juhyun basically appropriated Seungwan’s hand (when their own was free of Joy’s body parts or their sword). 

The day she showed them the town was one of the best days of her life. Both of them laughed and smiled until their cheeks hurt. They ate some fine nosh at the open market and watched a fire performance they had stumbled upon. They talked, held hands and even hugged. Juhyun bought her flowers, was attentive and caring, listened to everything Seungwan was telling and always remembered little things she had mentioned. That night the elder hearkened to her singing again, and then they wandered around the park till dawn.

Everything was just fine. But it wasn’t.

Juhyun behaved as if they were her older brother. Or something of that kind. It was not a bad thing at all, anyone would be willing to have such a brother, but not Seungwan. She felt peeved by being in tutelage like that. The reasoning behind the Velvet’s behaviour was understandable, and even so, she wanted that not. Seungwan wanted them to see her as an adult, as a woman, not as a child they had saved.

Once she discovered that longing in her heart, she didn’t know what to do with that. She liked being close to Juhyun, communicating openly and enjoying silent moments together, yet she was getting annoyed: at the way, Juhyun was responding to Sooyoung’s caresses; at the fact, she, Seungwan, was not able to touch Juhyun the same way Joy did. And so she started avoiding Juhyun.

They were not delighted, to say the least. Everything about Seungwan was strange to them. Starting from the very first day of their comeback till this day she was like the Moon - fluctuating in her demeanour. At first, she was quite distant, then warmed up to them. It was comprehensible as the two of them were learning each other from the start. But then she backed off again, stopped even looking at Juhyun, and they didn’t know why. For some unexplainable reason they felt disheartened; the more they approached her, the more she was slipping away. Juhyun was in a chafe. It was that novel feeling in their chest that made them angry. 

One night was an apogee, though. That evening Juhyun and Seulgi decided to attend the show, and it was for the first time Seungwan came to their table at the farthest corner of the hall. She placed herself beside Juhyun and received a questioning look from Joy, who was seated between the Velvets. Seungwan just smiled, feeling attention shifting to her.

Juhyun rugged their brows, already exasperated.

“Seungwan-ah,” they simply acknowledged, aiming to keep calm and not regard how beautiful the girl was. She had her hair tied in a low knot with a colourful pin on the side of her head.

“My wig! You never came before,” Seulgi stated and killed their soju. “What a turn up for the books!”

Seungwan was quick to react as she refilled their shot glass. Sooyoung sent her another quizzical glance.

“Winter must have come before summer. Is it snowing outside?” Juhyun mumbled and had a pull at their own liquor.

It made Seungwan smile tensely, sweep her eyes over the eldest raven.

“No. I just thought today is wending to a favour,” she said with a silken voice.

“Why?” Juhyun raised their glass again and sniffed at the liquid, then sipped; eyes watching the cryptic girl.

“For you to ask.” 

She was venturous enough to put her palm on top of the elder’s hand ─ a common action between them, yet something in her eyes made Juhyun curious. And anxious. 

“Hm,” pink and amethyst sparked as the Velvet brushed their hair up from their face, revealing slightly reddened cheeks and ears. Soju was doing its job but also did that warm hand.

Seulgi giggled and drank again. This time Seungwan let Joy do her part, but mainly because the former was busy peeling off Juhyun’s hand. She was delicate and carefully watched for any signs of objection. None was given and when the hand was free of cloth, she lovingly massaged it.

Seungwan knew how to flirt and seduce. She also knew how to read people’s reactions to her dalliance. It was her job and she was good at it. She learned by observing the older proficient girls but also practised. Yes, singing made up a great part of her popularity, however, her talent for keeping men’s attention on her was a trump card. Surely, Juhyun was no ordinary man, yet she could discern they were getting under her spell.

“Have you been to that pond lately?” Seungwan asked and traced the lines on the silky hand.

“No,” Juhyun murmured, feeling the whole world locked on those deft fingers. They didn’t realise they were craving for the girl’s touch so much. It was getting even hotter in the room, and a mix of pleasure and discontent crushed their chest.

“Me neither, but I was planning to go there with Yerim-ah in several days,” Seulgi edged in, oblivious to what was happening. Was something happening?

As to Joy, she was observing quietly, a cunning look and a crooked smile on her face. She glimpsed at Seungwan, but the latter was keeping her eyes on Juhyun’s hand. Sooyoung was not sure she fully understood the sudden change in her unnie’s behaviour and decided to pay more attention to her from now on. Above all, she always knew and had to know what was happening in her household. 

She turned to Seulgi and spoke softly,

“Would you like to go there with me as well?”

“It depends on how hard you would ask,” said the younger Velvet, eyes meeting the browns of their companion.

“I’ll show you if you follow me right now,” she half-whispered and played with the tails of their hair.

“Eh-he,” Seulgi vocalised and emptied their last shot of soju. That was their special way of expressing their excitement.

Before leaving, Joy shot her unnie an inexplicable eye to which the latter only smiled gently.

When they were gone Seungwan was left alone with Juhyun. At least it felt like they were alone, though the room was overcrowded with people. The raven thought it would be opportune to speak seriously with the girl.

“Seulgi has a soft spot for Joy,” commented Seungwan, her little finger slipping under the sleeve to the raven’s wrist. They swallowed - the touching was different from all those before and it was quirky, although not completely unpleasant.

“Seungwan-ah...”

“Ye?” She responded, eyes meeting the piercing gaze.

“Have you been avoiding me?”

She did not respond. Not a single muscle flinched on her face. Instead, she moved closer. So much closer Juhyun scented her out. She smelled like oranges on the snow.

“What are you doing?” The raven panicked. Was Seungwan doing the same thing she was doing to those men around? It seemed like that but still was different. She usually did not touch them, did not sit so close to them. Juhyun knew this because they watched her. So what was she doing now and why? 

“Talking to you,” her bow-like upper lip moved so sweetly, white teeth peeking through ruddy flesh. Juhyun felt ashamed. Well, no, they felt good as they were getting aroused, but they felt guilty they were suddenly aroused by their Seungwanie. It was a bad thing, they shouldn’t feel this towards her. 

“You are not exactly talking to me, Seungwan-ah,” they sought to bring her to light yet miserably failed. All those intentions to speak with her and fathom her reasoning were buried under the rising excitement. This just was not sane. They totally should not feel like that.

“What do you think I am doing then?” She asked in a low voice, her dark brown irises studying the raven from under the partially closed lids. She put the raven’s hand onto her lap and started toying with it ever so lightly Juhyun felt shivers running up and down their spine. Even their scalp was tingling.

“Seungwan-ah-ah...”

“Yes, Juhyun-ssi?” 

They needed to stop looking at her. And better stop breathing as well. Juhyun felt their head swinging, and it was a disaster. They felt as if they were falling down a hole to some unknown reality, where everything was just her. Something deviant was happening to them.

The Velvet detected their neck creaking as they turned their head away from that slightly blushing face. Suddenly their mouth was as dry as those canyons on Mars. They needed to drink something fast. 

Juhyun grabbed the shot glass and drank it off, burning waters flowing down their throat. They choked a little, receiving a gentle pat on their knee. Oh, no.

Thousands of thoughts invaded their sick mind and all of them were of her. They sensed blood coming up their body. It was embarrassing. Their ears would steam at any moment. The girl was doing practically nothing, yet Juhyun was losing their mind.

“S-stop it, Seungwan-ah,” they wheezed out desperately. They did not want her to stop. So shameless.

“Don’t leave yet. I will be back in a minute,” she whispered while her tormenting hand nudged their thigh.

Juhyun spaced out as she left, their back muscles tensed so much it hurt. Breathe in, Juhyun, breathe out. Slower and deeper. Why on earth did this sound so obliquely? What was wrong with their mind? Why was their heart beating so fast? Why did they feel like millions of needles had poked their skin all over their poor strained body? It was torture, an insufferable one.

Seungwan was eventually back, although not in a minute. But for Juhyun the time stopped at all. It appeared the other girls saw their guests off, and she helped a bit with tidying up.

They heard a swish of her dress, then discovered her soft palm on their forearm as she knelt beside them. Seungwan filled up their shot glass and Juhyun gulped it in a rushed motion.

“You are drinking it wrong, Juhyun-ssi,” she chanted melodically, refilling the jar again. Then she held it out to them. “You should discuss it by taking small sips, just like this.”

Seungwan guided their hand to her lips and kissed the glass, liquor touching her upper lip and moistening it. Strange how Juhyun’s eyes managed to stay at their pits because this action was simply eye-popping.

The smile she gave after touched her eyes, though Juhyun was concentrated only on those inviting lips. The raven brought the vessel to their own mouth and killed the drink at once without much thought. 

When Joy was teasing them, they never experienced the same reaction, and she was always very precise with what she did to them to arouse. But now this brown-haired woman to their left was spawning waves of animalistic fire in Juhyun by only breathing.

Seungwan clicked her tongue and shook her head, a smile still gracing her features.

“Rebelling up now?”

“Seungwan...” Juhyun sighed and their brain stopped functioning. On the spur of the moment, they wanted her as they had never wanted anyone before.

“You’re becoming tipsy, Juhyun-ssi. I warned you were drinking it wrong,” Seungwan brushed off the string of hair from the elder’s forehead and the latter visibly shuddered.

That was it, that was enough, that was too much. Juhyun seized that thin, delicate arm and pulled the girl to their side, pushing her to the floor. They pressed their body to hers tightly, while their other hand landed on her jaw with a sturdy hold.

Seungwan gasped. Her eyes widened in surprise and stuck on the parted lips, threatening to occupy her own. Her breath stilled at first as she felt agonising fingers tucking into her chin. Juhyun was a puff away, she sensed them grinding against her frame, their gaze smouldering. It made Seungwan shiver; her breath became ragged and heavy, while her heart pounded in her ears. She lived for them to kiss her right now.

Yet, Juhyun was thrown into the infernal fire, even their lashes melted under the heat. Their finger snaked to the springy outlined rim of that calling mouth and rubbed at it, bolts of electrifying tides dashing through every cell of their being. The raven leaned in and the tip of their tongue stung the girl’s upper lip almost insensibly as they nearly kissed her. Seungwan cheeped quietly, nerves hitting the ceiling, but Juhyun instantly jerked away, groaning.

They sat up and turned away, hands trembling out of deep emotion. Wrong. They were wrong.

Juhyun should not have done this. They almost kissed their Seungwanie, almost besmirched her and for what? For they were simply horny, blinded by a desire they even should not have. Not for her. 

“I’m so sorry, Seungwanie...” The Velvet whispered, absolutely disenchanted with the self. They couldn't look her in the eye now, hence the raven got up and hurtled away.

Once in their room, they slid down the door frame. Oh, how ashamed they were for still picturing the girl and her dreamy eyes, and soft lips, her creamy skin… She was innocent and her touch was innocent, otherwise, they’d have morphed, but they didn’t and it was even more terrible. Juhyun couldn’t understand why they reacted that way, why all of a sudden they hankered for having her ─ it had never happened before.

Was Seungwan playing with them? But why? What had caused her to do that to them? They had no idea.

Juhyun should not drink that much and should not allow her this close. Hopefully, when they sobered up, they'd not feel like that any more.

Well, it never worked their way. Ever since that night, the raven was possessed. They smelled oranges everywhere, they fell asleep and woke up with the only thought of Seungwan, but most of all, they wanted to have her. 

Juhyun needed to shun her but instead found themselves searching for her. Even their friend started questioning the elder’s behaviour.

“Juhyun-ah,” cooed Seulgi as they were walking down the street several days after Juhyun’s fault. The duo had just finished their mission and now was heading back to Joy’s.

“Eung...”

“What’s wrong, Juhyun-ah? You are not yourself lately… You know I can feel it,” the younger raven took their friend’s hand and squeezed it.

“Ah, nothing wrong, Seulgi-ah...” they replied with a weary tune to their voice. Juhyun wasn’t fond of sharing their concerns with anyone, even Seulgi, whom they trusted with their life.

The younger hummed, ruminating over words they could say to their beloved one. Juhyun was putting a good face on it and it was hard to deal with this side of them. They always barricaded their heart with a glacial facade and unflappable attitude. It was their way of coping with this world and Seulgi knew the background of that perfectly well - they had been together since Seulgi was 8. But they also had been mates since the latter was 15. It opened a window to Juhyun’s soul, although a miniature one. It was yet enough for Seulgi; they learned how to differentiate their personal feelings from the ones of Juhyun despite those being extremely vague. 

Besides, Yerimie had told them that Seungwan had cried the other night. It was not hard to put one-to-one thereafter. Juhyun was like a cat around hot milk with that girl, but the next moment they were not looking at each other any more. Even Joy stopped her witchery towards Juhyun. Something was going on between those.

Seulgi sighed. They knew Juhyun would not like them meddling; so what should they do then? Seulgi sighed again.

“Oh now don’t do this to me,” Juhyun whined and frowned after hearing their younger friend exhaling so heavily.

“I want to help, but you are not letting me.”

“Perhaps, I don’t need any help, Seulgi-ah,” the older raven mumbled, then kissed the fingers lying in their hand. “You know I appreciate your concern for me, but there is nothing to be worried about. I’m perfectly fine.”

“I know when you lie,” Seulgi replied, chagrined.

“So let me. Please,” Juhyun murmured. It was their war to battle.

“Just know that I love you and I’m always by your side,” the younger echoed as they hugged their mate.

“I know. I love you, too.”

Upon coming to the gates of their stay-place, the duo was met with an unusual noise. When they entered the yard, they managed to decipher previously muffled voices. One belonged to Joy while the other to a giant man, who was holding Yerimie by the arm in a painful grip. 

“Please, let her go. This is the wrong place,” Sooyoung cooed in the sweetest voice, honey dripping from her lips as she was trying to persuade the man.

“I want this girl, and she is here to entertain me,” he dragged Yerim closer to himself and clasped his arm around her tiny frame. She hissed and winced at the pain, rushing through her hand.

“Leave her alone,” said the voice not belonging to Joy in a dangerously low pitch. It was Juhyun, who emerged from behind the man and put the dagger up to his neck, pressing it hard enough to draw a drop of blood. 

He toughened but did not release the girl from his deadly hold. Suddenly, the other person appeared beside Juhyun and put his sword to their throat.

“Drop it,” he commanded receiving an annoyed glance from the Velvet.

“Let her go and I’ll drop it,” they growled, pressing harder and forcing the man to move with the blade as he tried to ease the stress of it.

“Back off,” Seulgi unsheathed their own sword and pointed it onto the guy at Juhyun’s side.

“I’ll fucking slaughter her if you move,” yelled that shorter man and changed his stance; Juhyun had to tilt their head as the blade was dangerously close to their artery.

“You’ll be dead before you know it,” yellowish eyes blazed menacingly.

“Okay, okay, I’ll let her go,” the giant hurried to interfere, feeling the air around him becoming extremely thick, and put his hands up to the air. “See?”

Yeri rushed to Seungwan, who was standing nearby with a pallid face; she enclasped her younger sister in a strong embrace. Several guests had gathered around, looking disturbed or flat angry. The rest was still inside as the other girls tried to divert their attention from the happening. 

The majority of clients knew how Joy’s place worked, they were patrons of it, and they behaved respectfully enjoying the diversity provided. However, newcomers were unaware of the rules and while some were eager to learn, the others preferred to impose their authority. Like that man who decided he could have any girl here. He was explained of the manners by fellow guests, however, some people just look for troubles.

“Now tell your lapdog to vail,” Juhyun gritted the jaw as a hot bloody trail ran down their neck.

“Do it,” the man commanded as he slowly turned his head to the side to take a look at the person, holding him at the tip of the dagger.

“But she...”

“I said do it,” he growled.

Seulgi watched the shorter man without blinking until he finally put down his sword and moved back.

“Move further,” they ordered and made a step towards him, pointing with their blade to the side.

“Sh, you bitch,” he spat yet did what was told to.

“Now, lass, take your little knife away from my neck,” the giant scoffed.

Juhyun estimated for a moment, then stepped back cautiously, hand still stretched out in case the man decided to attack.

“Good girl,” he sneered as he turned around and gave Juhyun a scan from head to toe; his hands still up in the air. “Huh, you’re of those Velvet things.”

The raven let the words wash off of them the moment they heard them. This man was just provoking by humiliating and giving those dirty looks, and while Juhyun would love to erase that arrogant smile from his face, they would not react for otherwise, he’d win the game.

“Take your dog and leave this place,” the elder raven said, eyes set on the man’s dark ones.

“You are quite bitchy for such a pretty face, you know?” He jeered, showing his ivories.

Juhyun bit the insides of their cheek.

“Please, leave. You can find what you are looking for at the other place further down the parallel street,” Joy appeared from behind the man and put her hand on his arm in a calming motion. That was a mistake.

He whipped his hand so as to knock Sooyoung down and thus distracted Juhyun for a split-second; that was enough for him to reach for them and strike their armed hand.

“Shit,” the raven sibilated as iron arms wreathed around them, constricting from any movement. The man was massive and a full head over Juhyun’s height. He pressed their hands behind their back and leaned in closer.

The whole action was fast and so unexpected, Seulgi twitched to come up to their friend but then recalled the other man standing right near them, ready to react any moment. They decided to stay, guarding him away. Juhyun was a dexterous expert fighter, they would be fine, Seulgi thought.

Meanwhile, Sooyoung was helped to her feet by a girl, and Seungwan felt the ground moving from under her own. Her Juhyun was so tiny compared to that man...

“They say you bitches like it rough,” the man breathed out into Juhyun’s face, sputtering. “And I can tell - you like it hard from behind.”

The guy grinned as he saw those two-coloured eyes widen with a splash of fear, yet Juhyun managed to secrete that right away; their face blunt and unreadable now.

“I swear I’ll screw that little cunt of yours to death,” he hissed angrily and shoved the raven back, making them roll over the ground.

“We’re leaving,” he announced loudly and swept his eyes over the crowd. “Motherfuckers.”

He spat under his feet and left, the other man following him close behind.

“Juhyu-”

“You alright?” Juhyun interrupted Seulgi as the latter appeared at their side, helping them to stand up.

“I am-”

“I as well,” anticipated the elder as they covered the cut on their neck with a hand. It was not deep yet bled quite much. “Let’s move.”

Seulgi shot a glance at Joy, who obviously was intending to approach them, and shook their head - saying not to. The younger Velvet picked up Juhyun’s dagger and hurried after their friend.

“Everything’s alright, go back to whatever you were doing!” They shouted to the gawking people and motioned to go inside with their hand.

“Juhyun-ah,” Seulgi called out as the elder quickened their step and was almost at their door.

“I need some rest, Seulgi-ah,” they requested quietly and entered their room, the door closing immediately after.

“Juhyun-ah… What did he tell you? Please,” Seulgi crooned through the door, their heart clenching with rising pain. They waited for any response, but Juhyun decided not to speak. “Please, let me know if you need anything, Juhyun-ah...”

Seulgi pressed their ear to the wood and listened. It was quiet inside as if there was no one in the room at all. The Velvet sighed and turned to leave when they were met with the eyes full of regret.

“Un-unnie, I’m sorry,” Yeri whispered and was once again enclasped into the tight hug, though this time by Seulgi.

“It’s okay, little turtle. Come with me, come,” they cooed and headed to their room. Everything will be okay.


	5. Chapter 5

## Chapter 5

The next day Juhyun spent in their room alone. Seulgi brought them meals, but they did not touch those, staying inside and doing nothing but laying on the floor and staring into the ceiling. They needed to wash themselves as well as clothes for blood had stained them; though it had clotted and the possibility of it to come off was heading to none. However, energy had left them, and they had no wish to live and enjoy the day. It was one of those periods when Juhyun was impuissant and depressed, and there were two intrinsic reasons for that. Yet, they preferred not to ponder over those or else it would worsen their mood even further. 

Their consciousness was slipping in and out of the leaden slumber, haunted by nightmares of the past. Juhyun fell and jumped in their bedding, awake and wet with sweat; heart beating faster than of an animal at bay. They hated the sense of flying, hated being somewhere high along with the touch of water covering their ears even in their dreams. Those were horrific experiences, and they refused to stop appearing in their mind while they slept. As if their sanity lived its own life, detached from the body containing it. 

Despite those things, Juhyun would love to stay in till the next morning, but the call of nature was much stronger than their will-power. The raven got up with a grunt, their sore back and weak limbs protesting; found fresh closing and washing accessories and stepped out of their cave. It was still bright outside and Juhyun winced as the light penetrated their pupils with unbearable force, making them put a hand to their eyes.

“Aigoo-sh,” the raven hissed and scrunched their lips and nose in a way Seulgi would have found adorable. They wondered where their mate was now.

As soon as they got used to the lighting, Juhyun warily descended from the porch to their shoes, neatly placed on the ground. It would be nice to walk barefoot and maybe they'd do that right after they clean themselves. The raven hurried to the opposite building where necessary amenities were and perfected their body. 

The water was chilly in the bucket, but they did not mind such things — being a wanderer meant being able to adapt to many factors, cold showers included. Juhyun washed their hair with love mothers had for their children, making sure to afterwards apply oils they always used to keep their chevelure in the healthiest state. Seulgi's mom had given the formula of the oils to them many years ago. Since they had picked the scents together Juhyun never changed the composition. It was one of many gifts Seulgi's family had presented to them.

Having finished polishing their body, Juhyun laundered their garments. Usually, servants would do that for them here, but this time they did it themselves. To be honest, it was the calmest act they enjoyed doing. Just seeing water soaking into textile and washing off the dirt made Juhyun content. They wished it was the same with their mind, though: cleansing your head from the taint of the past was not that simple.

“Ah... I have to tailor another one,” Juhyun grumbled as the collar of their shirt battled for the blood.

“We could help you with that if you let us,” someone spoke behind them, and the raven jerked away, startled; splashes of water flying all over the space. They almost wrung their neck as with wild eyes they turned to face the intruder. It was Seungwanie and she smiled, “Sorry for creeping up on you, Juhyun-ssi.”

The senior relaxed for they were in no danger, yet still clung onto the shirt in their palms, that by the nature of things drenched their fresh gown.

“You should have left it to our women,” Seungwan minded and stepped closer.

“I can launder well myself,” Juhyun sounded nearly offended as they averted their dress from the girl’s reach.

“No one’s doubting your laundry abilities, Juhyun-ssi,” the woman said with a smile as she found her vis-à-vis humorous. “I’m just saying they could take care of such maculations for you.”

Juhyun frowned incredulously and looked at the collar in their hands. They had no reasons to distrust neither the girl nor the servants — their clothing was spotless most of the time after the treatment. 

Being too focused on the bloody patch, the elder failed to notice Seungwan examined them with eyes full of adoration and mirth.

“Aigoo, guess I have little choice. I hope it’ll go off,” the raven said and held forth the shirt, realizing how much water they had splashed over the place and themselves. They sighed, displeased.

Seungwan’s lids narrowed into a delighted curve as she took the garment and put it into the bucket, “Don’t worry about the mess.”

Juhyun picked up the nearby towel and started patting themselves with it.

“May I ask why you are here?” They inquired, hands busy but eyes glued to the girl.

“Oh, I... was passing by and spotted your shoes...” She sounded troubled. “I wanted to thank you, but you were not leaving your room, and I was... worried... a little.”

She finished her sentence with the smallest voice and it made Juhyun’s heart turn and melt. She was worried. About them. They were so timid to even peek at her after that evening for they feared she might never want to meet them again, but here she was: concerned, talking to them and even smiling. Their warm-hearted Wannie...

“I am all right, Seungwan-ah. Just felt tired,” Juhyun answered and gave her the softest gaze possible. “Thank you for your regard.”

The brown hairs swayed at the motion when Seungwan shook her head, “Thank you, Juhyun-ssi. For Yerimie...”

“Don’t mention it,” they stated and folded the towel before gathering the rest of their belongings. “I want to have a walk around the park. Would you like to join me?”

Seungwan nodded, and the corners of her lips twitched up.

“I will go put this back first,” Juhyun gestured with their hands.

“Ne, let me call for someone to take care of this and I’m free to follow you,” the woman pointed to the shirt.

The raven wagged their head, and both of them left the premises. Juhyun returned to their room and hanged out wet garbs; their heart racing up at the thought of walking beside Seungwan. They put the upper jacket on just in case and took their box of green tea leaves, walked out. Juhyun reminded themselves they should keep an ample distance from the woman and apologise for their unworthy behaviour.

They headed to the backyard where they marvelled at the butterflies whirling around each other in some intricate dance before Seungwan appeared. For some reason, she was even lovelier than several minutes ago and Juhyun couldn’t help but fixed their eyes on her.

“Wouldn’t you get cold, Juhyun-ssi? Your clothes are still wet,” her brows arched against her thought as she gazed at the raven.

“Ah, no. It’s warm enough, they’ll dry out. Don’t worry,” they touched their hip where the soaked spot was to check whether it was vaporising, then puckered their lips in a soft smile. They beckoned the girl, “Come. I wish to try something.”

“Huh? What’s that?” Seungwan asked as she lined up with the raven.

“You’ll love it. How’s Yerim-ah? Her arm?” The couple was moving along the frizzy pathway as Juhyun was searching for the perfect spot.

“She is fine, just shocked a little. It’s for the first time we’ve encountered such...an attitude,” she replied and hugged herself, re-living the discomfort of the previous night. “I was afraid he had harmed you…”

Juhyun shifted their coloured pupils to the woman. She was so vulnerable at that point they wanted to lock her in their arms and hold her forever; protect her from the world they lived in.

“I’m not hurt, Seungwan-ah,” they murmured. “I’m strong and can defend myself.”

Seungwan smiled when Juhyun stretched their shoulders and walked with funny long strides. She knew they were right — besides themselves they also were adept to defend others. Yet, that man was jumbo. His hand was bigger than Juhyun’s head. It made Seungwan sick.

“Ah! Here!” The raven exclaimed and got barefoot in a split of a second. “Come on, take off yours.”

At first, the woman’s eyes grew bigger as she perked her brows, but then she removed her shoes and socks, stepped on the ticklish grass. The ground was warm, and the girl pulled her skirt up as to run. Juhyun was somewhere far in the distance, hopping like a carefree child and beaming with the brightest grin. Their hair, still a bit wet, moved in beautiful long waves, shining under the setting disk. 

“Seungwan-ah!” They called and froze, tipping their face up to the sky and closing their lids. It was so nice to feel the kiss of warmth on their skin.

“I’m here,” the girl answered as she came closer and stood in front of Juhyun with her visage turned to them.

“The sun is the other way,” the raven peeked at her with one eye and giggled, soon returning to their sunbathing experience.

“I know,” Seungwan murmured and bit her tongue. 

She did not need that distant star when she had Juhyun right before her eyes. 

Her gaze slid across their relaxed face to their neck where she spotted a tiny cut. It was like her fingers itched to touch, that’s why she stepped up and caressed the bruise as if it was a fragile fan of a butterfly. 

For several seconds Juhyun wasn’t registering what was going on, so when they opened their lids their jaw dropped to attempt a gasp. If only they had any strength for that — it vanished the moment Seungwan’s fingertips had poked at their skin. Yet again the burning started building at their gut and their mouth dried along with their eyes because they were not moving away from the woman’s face. That was some sorcery, no less.

“Does it hurt?” The girl asked in a gentle tone as she retrieved her hand and brought her big luminous pools to the pink-amethysts.

Juhyun swallowed their tongue, and they didn’t know how to speak without it. Their breath became shallow, and their heart started attacking them from inside. They managed a simple ragged hum and shook their head in denial — the cut did not hurt. Their soul did.

At that moment something changed in Seungwan’s eyes — they looked pained, and she turned away hurriedly, creating more space between their bodies. 

Juhyun thought they should apologise now while she was this far from them.

However, their line of introspection trailed off as a horrid thing happened — the raven heard a dog. They detected those awful barking noises mounting up closer to them, and when Juhyun turned to the source with a swift motion of their heels, they saw the beast coming for them.

It was huge; it was white, and it had teeth as big as those trees growing in the park. The creature was nearer with each second, and the raven yelped with the tone that was not their own. 

Seungwan had never seen Juhyun scurrying. She watched their tall figure dashing to a fallen tree afar and climbing onto it.

“Haetnimie!” Joy squealed as she appeared out of nowhere, trotting after her pet. She spotted Seungwan first, then the other body on top of the resting tree. “Come here, baby! Come to mommy!”

Sooyoung reached her unnie and stopped, panting. 

“That’s Juhyun-ssi. You better move Haetnim away, or they’ll breathe their last,” Seungwan said with both concern and fun. How was that possible that Juhyun was fearless of people, but screamed with horror because of a cute animal?

“Oh, my,” Joy sighed out and jogged to the place of action-drama. 

The older woman accompanied her and when they came, Juhyun was white as snow, disgust and fright all over their face.

“Take it away, take it away from me!” They shouted at Sooyoung, who found joy in the scene before her. Haetnim was a tiny dog of an ordinary cat size. It was jumping happily around the Velvet, bracing to meet a new human and give them the friendliest lick possible. Little did Haetnimie know...

“Look at them, unnie. This is the person who supposedly knows how to hold a sword,” she mocked with the biggest grin on her lips. Seungwan couldn’t help but titter.

“Bak Sooyoung, take your beast away or I swear-“

“You’re afraid to even look at her properly, Juhyun-ssi. You’ll stay there forever if I let her play around!” Joy bickered back and sniggered. 

“Seungwan-ah! Please!” The elder begged; they stepped further along the trunk and almost slipped, producing another wavering sound from their deepest core.

“Sooyoung-ah...” The brown-haired woman spelt, although the situation entertained her to tears.

Joy clucked her disappointment but came up to her lovely puppy and gathered her into her arms, pressing tight to her chest.

“Here, happy? You can come off now,” she said to Juhyun and kissed Haetnim, who started licking her fingers in excitement.

“Go and take your beast with you!” The elder groaned with furious motioning of their hand.

“Love me, love my dog!” Sooyoung nuzzled her puppy for a while but realising that the Velvet was not moving an inch, turned to leave. “Whatever, you haven’t deserved to befriend my precious Haetnimie, Juhyun-ssi.”

“Oh, I’ll live with that!” They yelled at her with extreme annoyance. 

“Tsk, tsk...” Joy shook her head and disappeared as quickly as had appeared.

“Are they gone? Don’t trifle with me, Seungwan-ah, are they gone?” Juhyun asked, hope dripping from their lips. The entire life had passed behind their eyes, blinding them when they’d seen that creature so close to them; never would they want to experience that again.

“They are, come back here,” the woman assured and looked at the raven stepping down with unsteady limbs.

“That beast is gigantic!” Juhyun stressed, shuddering at the memory as they flapped their wear when on the ground.

Seungwan laughed, and it was a blessing for the Velvet’s ears, though they were not yet ready to endure joyfulness themselves.

“Ha-ha-ha,” they mocked the girl and bobbed their head as they did. They needed to calm down, and their beloved green candy served as the best means for achieving that. Juhyun reached for the box in their pocket and took a leaf out. Without a second thought, they glanced at the woman and asked, “Do you want some?”

Seungwan stared at the hand that the Velvet had stretched out — a tight pellet pinched in between their thin fingers. Her face transformed into an unreadable mask, and before any of the duo could see the complete image, she guided their digits to her mouth. What was she doing?

WHAT IN THE NAME OF THE SPIRITS WAS SHE DOING?! 

Juhyun screamed inside as a fiery tongue brushed against their pads, and cool lips clasped around their tensed sticks. The move was short-lived yet over enough. 

Seungwan shied away in a trice, cheeks reddening fast, while the elder struggled dead hard to understand what to do with their burning fingers. Their face flushed, but more for those implications and pipe-dreams their mind had risen at the action. That was so hot. 

Seungwan was hot.

No! No, no, no, no! 

NO, they shouldn’t think like that!

Why the hell did she do this? Had she got a sunstroke? Or was Juhyun daydreaming? 

The raven blinked, lost in astonishment. Their head refused to work, but they needed to figure out what had happened. 

They shoved the wooden box down into their pants and goggled at the girl, standing with her back half-turned to them. Again, they didn’t morph, so she was not implying anything, but how was she not if her damp tongue had licked their fingers? Was it normal for people to put hands into each other openings just for fun? Juhyun got no clue.

It was obviously an accident. 

No, it wasn’t. She’d guided their hand with her own. 

Ah, shit. The Velvet’s brain would leak out through their nose — so tough the gears worked in their skull.

“S-SeungWAn-ah?” Their voice broke in the middle of her name. “Wha-why did you do... that?”

Her face hid in her palms as the girl was embarrassed to the point she craved to disappear. How could she explain what she had done if she didn’t know that herself? She just wanted them to... 

Oh, she simply wanted them. She had found herself thinking about Juhyun in that way when she saw them in the arms of Joy. Seungwan needed to hold them as well. 

Perhaps jealousy tortured her. And she wished to show the raven she was a woman. Like Joy. That was the reason she had come to Juhyun’s table that night — just to discover if she could enchant them. It was a temerarious decision, and fear clawed at her, but once Juhyun stepped into her snare — it set the girl.

It went out of control presto, and she almost lost her head when Juhyun pressed her to the floor — she burned with thirst. But then they left, and it felt like they rejected her. It hurt, yet her longing was stronger. 

“Seungwanie...” The Velvet called again yet before they could say a word she was running away, heels sparkling under the setting sun. 

Her longing was stronger, but not that strong to face the raven after her boldness. 

Juhyun’s mind got in tumult — they didn’t understand how they had to act around Seungwan any more. She became so unpredictable it was breaking all their attitudes. They should explore again, find out why they were so affected by her lately and why she behaved like that. 

Juhyun sat on the tree and sighed a gloomy cloud as they watched the girl’s figure growing smaller. She picked her footwear, and without putting it on continued galloping as if demons chased her. 

Seungwan turned complex. 

Juhyun needed to solve her.

*** 

She had been avoiding them for three days. Juhyun was going nuts: Seungwan hid her eyes, found a thousand and one excuses to not meet them during the daytime, and the worst — she was doing more flirting with the guests.

All right, she wasn’t; Juhyun made that up for they were on the edge, but still: she was coquetting with the men and ignored their persona. 

YAH!

Joy jumped at the sudden sound and turned her head to the elder as they slammed the table with their fist. Seulgi was on a mission alone and Juhyun had nothing to do but come and watch another performance and another night of Seungwan’s inattention. 

“Is anything bothering you, Juhyun-ssi?” Sooyoung’s voice was sweetly bland. She took a slant at their face.

“No,” the Velvet cut with their lip arched up to the side, their nose wrinkling under the frown.

“I see.” 

“I’ll… go to my room,” they stated and prepared to leave when Joy grabbed them by the hand.

“Would you like me to join you?”

Juhyun glanced at the young woman and thought for a moment.

“No.”

Not cogent enough for Joy, yet she gave them one of her fake smiles and watched them striding away. Being busy with her business she had gifted little of her presence to any of the Velvets. And clearly, something was off: Juhyun seemed moody and petulant and Seulgi was morose, though the latter spent less time at the house these days than a full moon showed its face in the skies.

She gazed at the people scattered around the hall. Sometimes she felt so tired she wanted to give everything up and move somewhere else where no one knew her and where she could lead a fresh course of existence. She’d teach kids and walk her lovely puppy beside some tall, handsome guy. What a story that might have been! 

Not that she was not content with what she had. Sooyoung liked her life and her job, people around her. Sometimes she merely felt fatigued.

Joy spotted Seungwan unnie — she was bored to death by a man bending her ears, yet smiled at him with learnt sincerity and did her best to nod from time to time, pretending she was listening. Her behaviour had changed and as far as Joy could recognise that was because of Juhyun or at least something they’d done or said. Seungwan was always sensitive to everything germane to the elder Velvet. 

Sooyoung puffed. She should visit them. She wanted to, and they hadn’t realized they needed her just yet. She’d wait for a while. Thus, Joy got up and went around the hall, giving the guests her pearly attention for once.

***

Juhyun was staring at the wall when the door to their room slid open and Sooyoung let herself in.

“S-s, I want to be alone,” the elder voiced out without a second glance at the woman.

“Sure,” she answered, shut the entrance behind herself and proceeded into the place.

“Don’t try me, Bak Sooyoung, I’m in no mood for your games,” Juhyun growled and snorted their displeasure.

“Sure,” she repeated as she took off her overcoat and placed it at the hanger nearby. 

Then Joy scoured the room. Juhyun’s sword was right in front of them, forgotten as they contemplated something inexistent; a few candles were burning at one side of the chamber while the bedding was folded in a neat box at the corner. 

The younger smiled to herself and started stripping off. Once she was only in her underclothing she obstructed the view of Juhyun and sat on her knees. She picked the unsheathed sword up from the floor and put it on her lap, caressing the blade with her thumb. The weapon was deadly marvellous, incised with Juhyun’s initials at the blade collar.

“What are you doing?” The Velvet asked, brows knit and eyes set on the woman. She danced on the razor’s edge.

“Nothing... yet,” she answered and placed the sword back into the black scabbard carefully and with some skill. “Tell me what to do.” 

Her browns met with the amethyst and pink ones.

“Leave.”

Sooyoung leaned to the side and propped the weapon aside, then returned to her original position. Her gaze was determined, and she was not planning to give up.

“Wanna view me?” She parted her knees as her hands slid across her thighs.

“Joy, leave,” Juhyun sighed and averted their eyes, exasperated.

“No. I will do everything you wish for except that,” she should be cautious now so as not to drive the raven to quit their own room. “Watch me come for you, I know you like it, Juhyun-ssi.”

“Soo-“

“Cum over me.”

“-young...”

“Fuck me unconscious,” she moved a little closer. “Tell me what you need, I’ll do it.”

“Joy-“ 

She forced her finger to silence their flesh and took their hand in hers.

She kissed their palm, their fingertips, whereupon brought two of their digits into her mouth, sucking gently. Her thumb traced Juhyun’s lips and pressed to enter their torrid wetness, while her tongue did some crazy moves around sensitive silky tips.

“Ugh,” Juhyun squirmed and grabbed the girl by her wrists with an attempt to subdue her. “I’ve said I don’t want to play your-”

“I am so wet already,” she purred. “You don’t have to play, I’ll do it myself for you…”

“Enough! I’m leaving,” the elder raven grunted and pushed the woman away to stand up.

“Oh no, you’re not.” 

Joy jumped from her position and straddled Juhyun, pressing herself tightly against their body and kissing them. She clasped their face in her hands as her lips smashed against theirs.

“You’re fucking hard. Don’t tell me you don’t want me,” she breathed out when she broke their kiss. She slid her hands to her hips, undid her clothing and tossed it away to press Juhyun’s palm to her core. 

“I need you, Juhyun-ssi. Take me now, fuck me any way you want.” Joy sighed as she readjusted herself on their hand. “Punish me for disobedience. Make me scream. The way you do, Juhyun-ssi-oh...”

“Sssoyoung-“

“Shut up and fuck me!”

The woman yanked Juhyun’s arm from between her legs and grazed their fingers, tasting herself; kissed her partner with wild hunger. 

The latter hummed to her demand. Surrendered. 

Screw this. Their mind had been fogged with confusion and frustration for too long, and if someone was willing to return some light there — saying ’no’ would be a crime. Besides, this girl was delicious.

She moaned when Juhyun gripped her hair and drew her head to the side, leeching to her neck.

“No, no-h, ah... no ma-ah-ks,” she warned.

“I heard you suggesting I can do what I want,” the Velvet husked and bit her skin, following it with a strong lick. They returned their hand to her wet folds and shoved several digits inside, making Joy gasp. 

“I’ll cum onto your pretty face,” they thrust deep into her, “and into your sweet dirty mouth.” She groaned, nails digging into Juhyun’s upper back. “And then I will take you from behind. Deal?”

“Yessss...” The girl wailed as she swayed her pelvis to meet their palm.

“Don’t touch yourself, Sooyoung,” the elder raven ordered while they finger-fucked her. She couldn’t come without her clit being touched, so Juhyun decided to bring her to her peak and leave her hanging there until she begged for release.

“Hard-uh,” she ground against the velvety surface, trying to please her sensitive spot, but her lover was not letting her.

Juhyun teased and tortured, dropped more marks under her ear and attacked her mouth, banging it with their muscle until she howled continuously and needily. Joy shuddered when their digits left her depth and gasped when they entered past her lips. She liked it rough, and although Juhyun was not a big fan of that, they tried to play along. She was more than grateful afterwards.

They bussed her again, then lifted her from their lap and stood up, untying their pants. Sooyoung needed no words to lay hands on Juhyun’s cock. She stroked it with fondness and licked its full length, drawing a stiffened moan. She pressed the tip to her flat tongue, hugged it with her mouth as if kissing the cloud, sucked it and pushed deeper. Juhyun never blinked, watching her every movement with lecherous eyes — she felt getting wetter just under that look.

Sooyoung tilted her head and pulled her jaw as her tongue swirled at the glans when she released it from her hold. She pumped with her hands, but after moved one to her pussy and gathered some of her juices to spread all over her lover’s shaft.

“Shit, Sooyoung,” Juhyun growled low, throbbing with excitement when she kissed their slick end again and rolled her head to swallow it deep. Her mouth was so hot, and a mix of her wetness and saliva made the elder raven’s blood boil. 

She was always so unbelievably great at multitasking — sucking selflessly, fondling their thighs and ass, and moaning her content at the most enjoyable moments, sending vibrations all over Juhyun’s body. She looked so cute when gazing up at them, her lips stretched around their dick, and at the same time — sexy when she slapped their tip against her tongue before shoving it far into her throat. Sooyoung was a sucking goddess alive.

“I’m… now,” Juhyun forced out in a veiled voice as they impended their release. 

They grabbed their member and handled it until they spilt over Joy’s face. She jerked at the first shot, surprised, but then relaxed, feeling warm, thick mass streaming down her skin. 

“SO… HOT,” the Velvet hissed and right away guided their end to the girl’s lips, forcing it through. They placed their hands on her head and started moving their hips without loitering.

Sooyoung opened her eyes and peeked at Juhyun, whose face was beautifully contorted as they fucked her mouth tenderly. She put her palms on their sides to prevent them from thrusting too deep and sucked. Sucked so hard as if that was her last time.

For Juhyun was becoming impatient, greedy and possessive, their movements turned rougher and sharper while their grip on the girl’s head stronger. 

“Ah-uh, Joy-ah,” they cooed, brushing her bangs away from her forehead. “Come ON!”

They stilled as the woman bobbed her skull in different directions, devouring their tip and making them come again. Their shaft thudded with relish along with their entire body quivering in blissful agony as they watched their seed filling Sooyoung’s mouth. She spilt a little before swallowing, and a new creamy thread trickled down her face — another aphrodisiac for Juhyun.

“You are f-fucking dynamite, Sooyoung,” they whispered in a gruff voice. 

With their thumb, they wiped their semen up her chin to her lips, plunging it into her opening.

“Mmm,” she hummed and picked her teeth at the digit just to see Juhyun quirk their brow.

“Up, my little chick,” they helped her to her feet and turned the girl around, pressing her tight ass to their groin while their hands molested her scantily clad body. Juhyun removed her hair from her shoulder and neck, then kissed under the ear while Joy slightly flexed her knees and arched her lower back, forcing her butt vigorously to the elder’s phallus. “Bow.” 

Sooyoung moaned as she bent down and leaned her arms on her thighs, her frame shivering with anticipation. Juhyun didn’t make her wait for they planted their cock into her, garnering the sweetest astounded bawl. She fit like a glove around them — very narrow and drenched one, yet just peachy.

“Ah-uh! Juhyun-ssi,” Joy squeaked when they clutched at her buttocks, pulling those apart to watch as they sank into her and stretched her time after time. 

The elder raven moved in harsh, vast motions; skin slapping skin with random sloppy sounds filling the room on a par with heavy breaths and needful groans. A drop of sweat fell from Juhyun’s chin onto the pearly surface of the woman’s back as the former leaned forward and grabbed her waist, banging mercilessly. 

“...Juhyun-ssi-i-t!”

“Take your hands away, Sooyoungie,” they crooned and captured her arms, pinning them to her back. “I said no touching yourself.”

At this point, it was getting painful — she wanted to come so much her legs started tingling. Her hips moved hectically, vainly trying to get her sensitive spot some rubbing.

“Fu-uh-ck!” Joy yowled, distressed. “Please!”

“Sure,” Juhyun echoed her recent tone and continued humping. She wasn’t cogent enough.

“AH! P-PLEASE-uh!” Her knees gave up, and she almost dropped save that Juhyun kept her standing.

“Don’t do that, Sooyoung.”

“Please, touch me-h... Oh, please, make me come on you,” she sighed out. “Make me come, make me... please!”

“Cute,” the way Joy spoke in the tiniest breathless voice was a huge turn on. They loved her like that.

Juhyun pulled the girl up, and she leaned her back against their front, winding her hand around their neck and resting her head back. As she felt silky hands on her skin, she grabbed one with her own and guided it to her demanding spot. She lurched once Juhyun brushed her clit.

“Suck before I do you,” the elder whispered and put three of their digits into her opened mouth. “Come on, Joy, show me how much you want me.”

Her cool, red lips clasped as her muscle slid between the fingers while her free hand was grasped and rammed into her breast. Juhyun rocked slowly and moaned into her ear as she cajoled them into relieving her of the heat. She purred and peeped and groaned; digits pressed onto her tongue while her body hooked on the dick.

“Hyun!” She cried out and squirmed when Juhyun freed her mouth and ringed her blob of nerve. 

“Naughty duckling,” the Velvet cuddled Joy while playing with her senses. 

She wriggled and crouched, calling Juhyun by their name under one breath. She was too worked up and just yearned for her bliss which she got soon, as her lover fingered and tickled, and filled her for the last time.

Her body tensed, and she let it sink again, hearing her howls from a distance. She felt Juhyun shot inside her ere they pulled out, and a blend of their liquids oozed from her — something her partner enjoyed enormously.

When their breaths were steady enough, Juhyun bussed her on the neck and released her from their hold.

“I’ll get you a napkin, Bak Sooyoung.” 

They cleaned themselves first, then wiped their glaze from the girl’s reddened face while she dreamily eyed them. When Juhyun looked down to mop the woman’s thighs, they clucked. 

“Yah, you are dripping onto the floor,” one corner of their mouth rose in a smile. “I like it though.”

“Do all of your people enjoy watching this much or is it just you?” Joy asked, taking the napkin from Juhyun’s hands and cleaning herself.

“What about Seulgi?” 

“Not as you do.”

“They’re probably more into hearing then,” Juhyun readjusted their pants and shirt carelessly.

“Have you ever been jealous of me sleeping with your mate?” The woman placed her arms around the elder’s neck, looking at their face with an overt curiosity.

“No. You are your own mistress, you can sleep with anybody you want. We are not each other’s possessions.”

A coy curve moved her lips as she traced Juhyun’s jaw.

“Uh-huh. I bet you won’t get angry even if Seulgi fucks me right in front of your salad.”

She suppressed her smile from growing bigger and instead lustily kissed Juhyun, whose mind went out for a break after her words.

“You’re still hard and I’d like to please you more, but I’m dead on my feet. I hope you’ll forgive me, Juhyun-ssi,” Sooyoung pecked their cheek.

“Ne...”

With a soft smirk, the girl dressed up and left. 

What did she mean by that? Why would Juhyun be angry with such things? Joy could have sex and spend time with anyone she preferred. The same was with Seulgi. And any other person, because no one was anyone’s property.

Okay, such beliefs were not common among ordinary humans, obsessed with emotions and ‘belonging to each other’. (Lost in thoughts, Juhyun patted the floor with napkins, drying off the moisture their chick had left.) They differed from common people. What they had for Seulgi was incompatible and laid beyond earthly feelings — it was an exceptional, deep and strong connection. As to what they felt for Seungwan and Yeri, and Sooyoung — that was also unalike. They were a family. Sort of. 

All right, banging Joy was a bit out of the range, but the other girls still fit. No? And that thing they had suddenly experienced towards Seungwan was only obfuscation. She was yet their little Wannie, their little girl, even though she was not that little any more. She matured and turned into a young, desirable wo-

Woah, woah! Juhyun squatted low and sighed nervously. Fine, they did hit the table today because Seungwan was paying attention to everyone except them. But it meant nothing. Nothing at all! They just wanted to talk to her, for she had been avoiding them after she had licked their fingers in the park. 

Was it normal for family members to lick each other’s digits? 

Juhyun growled, a decision to take a much-needed shower bubbling in their brains. A pity their mind couldn’t wash off the intrusive thoughts as efficiently as the water washed off the sweat. And that was some hardcore thinking they were going through now. For the umpteenth time for the past weeks.

Seungwan. Son Seungwan, 21 years old, beautiful, caring, amusing and bright, feminine, calm and warm-hearted. Also lovely and remarkably handsome. Was Juhyun repeating themselves? No, yet the girl was indeed a highlight of a beauty! She had always been, but these days she appeared to be more attractive than pollen to bees. Like her eyes were twinkling, and her smile beamed on her kissable face. And her hands: soft and affectionate, and caressing and oh how much they wanted her to touch them again.

“SH!” Juhyun dashed a bar of soap at the wall. 

Okay, it could be that they developed a thing for her, but it occurred only on that night when they’d tried to kiss her. Had she enchanted them or something? Juhyun had always enjoyed her company, but since that evening they needed more of her, including her body. 

That thing was called lust — pure 100% lust. They had it for Joy. However, they felt fine when she flirted with Seulgi in front of them — that’s correct. Then why was the Velvet so displeased with Seungwan not paying attention to them? Was it because they hadn’t tasted her yet? Would they feel better if they take her? 

It was wrong. 

Juhyun should turn everything back to what it had been before: no dreams of Seungwan’s lips, no thoughts of tongue kissing her, no images of undressing her, pinning her and-

The raven dropped a bucket of cold water all over their body, but it seemed like it evaporated off their skin the moment those two touched. They should find a new job tomorrow, for they were getting psycho doing nothing. That’d help them distract their mind from the girl and their desires. Hopefully, soon everything would be tranquil again. 

It had to be.


	6. Chapter 6

“Come in!”

When someone knocked at their door, Juhyun was sitting at the low table in their room, doing calligraphy. The brush moved rapidly and precisely on the paper, leaving neat and smooth lines of blank ink. _Son Seung Wan_. She had a beautiful name. It was warm and melodic and tickled the mouth when pronounced. And it stuck in Juhyun’s mind ever since they woke up several hours ago after the tiring long mission. Their body was worn out, yet it wasn’t enough to silence their head — it continued to drift towards the girl the same way oceans were pulled to the Moon. 

“Juhyun-ssi,” Seungwan called and stood quietly at the entrance, waiting for the raven to pay her attention.

The latter put the brush down and inhaled deeply, admiring the inscription they made with a delicate curve over their lips. Beautiful.

They exhaled and turned their head to the young woman. She wore a soft expression on her face and a white plain hanbok with pants instead of a skirt; a violet box in her palms. 

“Hello,” Juhyun said and stared at their guest expectantly.

“Hello,” she echoed, knelt and set the box on the floor. “I came... to apologise.”

How interesting. The raven peeked at the present. She had never given them anything before, so they were intrigued by such a move now. 

They nodded.

“For what?”

“For avoiding you,” she bowed her head and hid her eyes. Shimmering light from the candles in the room enveloped her in their warmth and made her look seraphic.

Juhyun’s heart beat faster. 

“Why have you been avoiding me? Did I do something wrong?” They asked and crawled closer to the young woman still sitting at an aperture of the door.

“No,” she whispered as her hands tightened at the cloth of her pants.

“Then why?” 

“I was… embarrassed.”

“Is this for me?” Juhyun picked up the box.

“Ye...”

They opened the gift and saw a perfect, round, white-orange cake with cute little carrots on top. A most refulgent grin graced their face.

“Did _you_ bake it?” The raven inquired, marvelling at the creation.

“Yes,” the girl smiled in return, gratified at how the elder reacted.

“Will you try it with me now?”

“It’s still somewhat warm, but yes,” she said and adored her vis-à-vis, who gleamed with happiness at this point.

“Then hurry inside, Seungwanie,” they got up and put the cake on the chest of drawers, whirled the calligraphy set from its place and lovingly rolled the paper with the girl’s name, putting it in one of the drawers.

“I think I have a knife somewhere here,” Juhyun said as they moved the present to the table. Seungwan positioned herself at the other side of the furniture and observed the raven with a gentle smile. “Aha! Here!”

They were back, and soon the treat was cut into clean pieces. Juhyun also brought some napkins and placed them nearby.

“I didn’t know you could bake,” they vocalised and bit onto the crunchy carrot.

“You don’t know many things about me, Juhyun-ssi,” replied Seungwan and took a small bite herself. 

“Oh yah! This is so good!” 

“I’m glad you like it.”

“Of course, I do! This is the best carrot cake I’ve ever tried! Thank you~”

Juhyun squeezed the girl’s hand and continued devouring the dessert. Yet a scary expression appeared on their face. 

Enough of pleasantries. Time to get back to the problem.

“So, you were embarrassed...” They began and Seungwan’s heart fell to her feet. She hoped they’d not pursuit that issue as the raven seemed calm and satisfied. How fancy. Juhyun cocked their brow and glanced curiously at the girl. They still needed to find out the reasoning for her action. “Why?”

Seungwan stiffened a sigh. What should she tell them? That she liked them? Wanted to hug and kiss them? That she was losing it when she was around them and thus she did silly, unexplainable and previously unimaginable things?

It was fun, Juhyun thought chewing at the treat as they studied the girl’s face. She was so graphic with her facial expressions they could capture every second and each would differ from the others. The younger struggled to find a proper answer, her cheeks turning red. _Lovely_.

“Because you licked my fingers, Seungwan-ah?” Oh, the only memory of that evoked burning sensations in Juhyun’s gut.

She pursed her lips and averted her eyes, ashamed yet again. 

“It’s okay, Wannie. I’m not mad at you,” the raven cooed and finished their piece, kissing their fingertips away from the bits. “I just wish to learn why did you do that.”

“I… don’t know. I’m sorry, I-”

“You are sorry… Do you want to know how I felt?” Juhyun asked and without warning grabbed the girl’s hand, which she had used to hold her cake. 

The next second Seungwan’s breath was in a hitch as she sensed the insides of the velvet mouth with her own digits. Her eyes popped out and her jaw dropped while Juhyun worked their tongue to gather the cream. Once they were done, Seungwan was ready to meet the maker.

“Shocking, right?” The Velvet asked, widening their lids and cleaning their lips. They felt vengeful to some extent, and as they saw the girl lost a grasp of her mind, they smirked devilishly, content. “Then you ran away. And _never_ talked to me for over two f-king weeks!”

Juhyun took her hand in theirs and patted it with a napkin, although aggressively.

“But do you know what is more nerve-wracking?” They wrinkled the paper and threw it onto the table, irritated. “You play games with me and because of that I feel something I’m not sure I should, Son Seungwan.”

They sported the girl a stern eye. Their face was passive, but the gaze pierced her through like a dagger. She felt like a fish out of water. 

“I’m kindly asking you to explain to me what’s happening, Son Seungwan. Because I have no idea how to behave around you.”

She felt like a teenager who was scolded for her inappropriate behaviour. She had to stop such feelings and take responsibility for her actions _and_ arisen consequences as a grown-up person. After all, Seungwan came here to apologize; dot the i’s and cross the t’s.

“Am I talking to the wall, Wannie?” They sounded threatening, and it added to the girl’s perturbation; her heart raced even more. 

“Aigoo… Let’s discuss it. I need us to be at ease again. Tell me what is wrong.” The raven’s tone became softer, and they took her by the hand again, peering into her eyes.

“Nothing’s wrong,” she chirped.

Ah, not again! Juhyun was fed up and they burst out. 

“For fuck’s sake, Seungwan, you drive me crazy!” She shrank into herself as anger glistened in the pools in front. The Velvet truly didn’t understand how they had to act when there was ‘nothing wrong’. They let go of her, but the girl grabbed their forearm. “If you think this is fine, the hell do you want from me then?”

“K-kiss me.”

...Huh?

Juhyun opened their mouth, but the sounds refused to escape. They gawked at the younger.

“Eung?” They managed to mutter after a while.

“Kiss me,” a whisper passed. So Juhyun did not mishear.

“What?”

This is not what they expected her to say. They were thunderstruck, and everything was telling them she was surprised as well since her eyes widened, and she looked terrified. But then she moved and appeared right beside them.

Juhyun lost their heartbeat. And their breath when Seungwan cupped their face, gazed in their panicked pink-amethysts. Something was out of square with them as they could not move. 

Was that what it felt to miss a mind? Her lips pressed softly to their own, and Juhyun forgot life existed. The kiss differed so much from what they had pictured in their dreams. And it was too quick.

Seungwan detached herself and removed her trembling hands away from the elder. Her cheeks flushed, and she seemed frightened as she sent Juhyun the expectant gaze.

“What… are you doing?” The raven muttered. They had wanted her to the extreme before, but now that she kissed them herself, they were incredulously nervous.

The girl swallowed a lump in her throat and voiced barely above a sigh, “Sh-showing what… I want from you.”

“What?” Juhyun inflamed.

“Stop looking at me as if I am still a child.”

Gears in the elder’s brain overheated because of an intense run, turning everything into the red. Was this why she had been discontent with them? Because they treated her like a youngster? Was this the reason for her to halt calling them ‘oppa’? Was she thinking they considered her to be their younger sister?

So, the Velvet pondered, for Seungwan, their attention was that of a custodian for whom she was just a child. And she didn’t want that.

She wanted the other thing. The thing with kissing...

Unexpected. 

Exciting!

 _Mindblowing_ …

 _H._ _O. T_.

“You were seducing me!” Juhyun exclaimed with a smug smile as broken pieces in their brain formed a full picture. They felt highly aroused by this thought. Also, it meant they had been reacting that much because of her advances. The raven was blind to recognize those, for it had never crossed their mind that she could wish for them like a woman for a man. For the elder, she was still their little Wannie. And that was their biggest mistake — seeing people the same way after so many years. This girl had matured and now was of a certain age to think about such things. 

They had been so ignorant!

Juhyun smirked and turned their body to face the young woman. Their nervousness flew through the window as fast as orts were thrown away, excitement taking charge instead. The woman, on the contrary, felt even more uncomfortable as the raven glanced over her with the cunningest grin. She did not plan any of this. 

“You are right, Seungwanie, I know nothing about you,” the elder quirked their brow and leaned in towards the girl. “Let’s start my education.”

Full of dread, her eyes were swiftly moving around Juhyun’s face. She would like to run away, to hide in her room and never come out. As if reading her mind, the Velvet clasped their burning hand over her wrist, making her flinch. Juhyun chuckled.

“Now kiss me again,” they declared and stared her down. They solved only a part of the puzzle. The other still needed to be addressed — they were not morphing under her touch. It was mystifying. “Seungwan-ah?” 

The girl shook her head, and her breathing stilled. She tried to retrieve her hand, but those agonizing fingers clutched tighter.

“Then I’ll kiss _you_.”

They shifted their gaze to her mouth as they cradled her jaw and bent forward. Juhyun could sense her shaking like a leaf when they covered her lips with theirs. It was a soft touch, almost a peck. Until they moved.

Yet again the universe ceased its rotation. The world tapered to her sweetness, and it seemed like the Velvet had never kissed anyone up to now. They pressed harder and tweaked her upper lip, then smacked on the bottom one tenderly as if exploring the sensation it brought. They needed more.

As Juhyun put the other hand at Seungwan’s nape and pulled her closer to their frame, they turned into fire, and she melted on them — a sharp puff escaped her when they slid their tongue against her delicate flesh. And once she laid her hands around their head and parted her mouth, inviting for deeper inspection, the raven lost their wits. 

Yet, no morphing.

Their tongue glided across while lips shuffled with the ones of the woman. What was that word she had mentioned towards soju during the night she tried to seduce them for the first time? Discuss the taste? Right, Juhyun was discussing her the very best they could now. However, they found themselves being insatiable, in need of her sap.

And so they stung their muscly flicker into her heat with gusto, devouring her; hand gripping harder behind her head. That was a timely move as Seungwan flinched out of surprise. She had never kissed before, had never felt anything of what she was feeling right now. It was nagging in the most pleasurable way, sparking ripples of exaltation within her. Juhyun’s tongue — a tad fuzzy — caused titillating sensations, making her thrilled through her core.

Seungwan mewed as Juhyun tried to conquer her mouth. It was easy for them to do so as she was obviously losing herself to the world. The Velvet broke the kiss to sweep their body as close to the girl as possible. But Seungwan lagged to catch the absence of Juhyun’s lips as the latter returned to their primary task faster than the speed of light.

It was passionate and greedy this time. The raven did not leave any chance for the woman to get used to their pace or movements, for they dominated her mouth with hunger of thousand years. What Juhyun was doing was indescribable, and it made Seungwan weak. She failed to spot herself moaning, wishing for air, smoking with feelings she hadn’t had before.

And finally! Finally, they morphed. They should inspect such an unusual behaviour of their body, but sometime later. Now they were busy.

When Juhyun sensed her pushing them away faintly, their mind jumped back into the head in awareness — they almost sucked her in their kiss. The raven disconnected themselves from Seungwan, and she leaned slightly to the side. They stabilized her by her shoulders.

The girl panted hard, eyes clouded and lips damask and swollen. Juhyun observed her, gasping, and felt the urge to repeat everything again, but judging by the looks of Seungwan she was not ready for act two, clinging to the elder’s arms as if clinging for her life.

She was hot; she was sexy; she was alluring and the Velvet wondered when she had become like this. 

They nipped at the younger’s shoulders, peered at her eyes as they searched for her gaze.

“Seungwan...”

Her darkened irises rolled up under the heavy lids and set at the face in front, unfocused. Oh, how tempting she was. How would she react to other things if she got this much affected by a simple kiss?

“Seungwan...”

“Wai… Wait,” she breathed out and swallowed — her throat got dry, and she began burning alive. She shifted her browns to Juhyun’s reddened lips and licked her own. However, when the raven closed the distance between them, she pressed her fingers to their mouth.

Allowing a moment of rest, Juhyun took her hand in theirs and tilted it delicately. They kissed the outer side of her digits and kept them glued to their skin for a while. After the Velvet had tasted her, they were craving for more. They needed to study her to the fullest. They were so aroused, it seemed they had never been like this before. Seungwan was superlunary. Probably, they still should not desire for her, but knowing that she wanted this, they could not withstand temptation.

Juhyun ran another hand across her cheek and tucked chestnut tresses behind her ear, marvelling at how soft she was to touch. Their gaze travelled down to her delicate neck, to the neckline, and so did their fingers as they glided them along her glowing skin. Seungwan shivered and squeezed their forearm.

A new star was born somewhere in the outer space as their eyes met. The raven gravitated to the girl as no greater power existed at that second than her lips. She puffed through her nose at an alien tongue sidled in her mouth, gaped at the caress to her side when Juhyun tried to press her closer to themselves. 

It was an awful posture. She was so far away from them, they couldn’t feel her body against theirs, and they lacked that so much it hurt. It was not an exaggeration as their groin was literally bursting apart. And when Seungwan got brave enough to use her own tongue, Juhyun felt like hacking through their pants.

They kinked her in their arms as they moved their mouth to her neck, sucking on it and tracing wet kisses accompanied by bubbly licks. 

_Oh, wow._

“Ah, Juh… Ah-h,” Seungwan sighed at the fabulous sensations. She sank her fingers in the black hair, clasping Juhyun’s head in her hands and gaining a constrained groan from them. “Please...”

She didn’t know what she begged for. She wanted them to touch her everywhere, to kiss her here and there, to induce those heavenly senses to her and all the same she needed them to stop because she suffered under those lips.

The woman moaned at yet another buss planted to her mouth and floated into the waterfall called bliss. The girl tugged at the sleeve of Juhyun’s arm while her other hand accidentally landed on their thigh. Very close. 

No, _too_ close.

The elder shuddered and whimpered and started back — they were so high they’d come at any further contact. They had to end this, or they’d end possessing the woman right here.

“We should s-stop, Wannie,” the Velvet wheezed.

It stunned Seungwan. Her brain was definitely malfunctioning as she was not comprehending the reasoning behind that request. Just a second ago she was in their arms, pressed to the scorching body and coated by the most nectarous lips, and now they had to stop. 

“Why?” She whispered.

“Because I want you to a fault. _All_ of you,” Juhyun growled in desperation. 

Many thoughts buzzed in her head, but none of them matched the phrase.

“Then have me,” the words rolled off of her tongue so easily it surprised her.

She took their face in her palms and looked at them with the most amorous eyes in the universe. The Velvet shivered with their entire being at both caress and gaze. She kissed them sweetly after, with the passion she had for them. 

“Seungwan-ah,” they murmured and cupped her cheeks. “Oh, what you do to me.”

“I want you, too, Juhyun-ssi.”

She bussed them once again and sighed,

_“Take me.”_


	7. Chapter 7

The moment the back of the girl’s head touched Juhyun’s bedding the latter pressed Seungwan against it and battled her mouth, hands roaming about her body. She peeped so sweetly as a hot palm landed on her neckline and dived under her shirt. Juhyun pulled at the ribbon, bringing the garment open before releasing her bosom from the material tightening it. Perky breasts, free from previous pressure, moulded in the raven’s touch as they kneaded her bouncy flesh, hard nipples rubbing against soft skin, while her lover’s lips feasted on her collar.

“I want you so much, Seungwan,” they viewed her; she could cross her heart she was deflagrating under that gaze.

Juhyun merged into the woman, spreading her thighs, mouths mere inches from each other. It took her breath away, and she wished for the kiss of life, so Seungwan leaned in, cradled the elder’s face in her hands and bussed them. With a gasp, she curved forward as their fingers snaked along her stomach. Pressing themselves flush against her crotch, the raven patted her hips.

Their groin rubbed against her and they bit her neck, groaning quietly. As she wanted to lift Juhyun’s head and smooch them again, she tugged at the black hair, but the Velvet moaned even louder, all in a tremor. 

“Oh, what you do to me,” the elder respired as they backed away; hazy eyes piercing the girl. Juhyun would burn her out.

With a swift motion, they freed the woman’s upper body from her gown, then spent some time undoing her pants with an annoyed expression on their face. Seeing their indignation, she helped them with the item and the cloth on her private parts and now was completely naked before them.

“Ss... you’re so beautiful...” The silk of their hand slid across her collarbones, between her breasts and stopped at the waist, that contracted under the touch. Their eyes returned to hers. “Undress me.” 

And so she did, her fingers bashfully running over their chest, opening it to the view as the shirt got down. The Velvet’s body was thin but quite muscular — probably, the result of sword fighting for years or simply because of morphing; Seungwan didn’t know and it didn’t matter as she just craved to fondle them. She caressed their skin with her fingertips and nails, making Juhyun’s muscles twitch. The feeling their flesh gave was unique, for being exceptionally silky.

Juhyun smirked, watching the girl fascinating their body. She had no idea what they would do to her with it. As they thought about it, they lowered down and kissed her, while their hands travelled to her butt. It was tight and wonderful to grope. The woman gasped at the unfamiliar sensation as her lover squeezed her buttocks and drew her to their hips, where something solid was bulging out. She had felt it before, but not as distinct as now, being nude. Without a doubt, Seungwan wanted to learn what that was.

As if reading her mind, the raven shifted back and pulled down their pants. Their member resisted for a while but then bobbed up as Juhyun took off the last piece of wear. They tossed it away and simpered at the girl. Oh, how hard they would make her scream with that thing she was looking at.

“Touch me,” they husked and guided that shy hand to their cock, gripping it. The Velvet licked and parted their lips as they gave themselves several light strokes with her help.

That was so, _so hot_ , Seungwan thought when a venous shaft throbbed with intervals under her caress. It was strong, curved upwards and ended with broad glistening tip. She wanted to explore, but the elder pushed her fist aside, pinning her flat to the bedding.

They kissed her cheek first, then moved to her neck and shoulders while their palm rubbed at the sensitive pearl of her breast. Seungwan sighed and gasped, eyes shut, for Juhyun licked the way to her other perky flesh, putting her nipple into their mouth and sucking on it with appetite. Their tongue was stinging as it whirled around that knot of nerves, their lips tugging and nibbling until their teeth dug into it. That sent a wave of shock to her lower abdomen, where an ocean of heat had been created. 

Seungwan pulled at their hair again when the raven pinched and twisted her other nipple. They gripped the full volume before sliding their hand to her side, making the girl arch her back a little. So she was sensitive at those parts, Juhyun noted and proceeded with their caress towards her midriff, where they teased her with feather-like touches whereupon skimmed to her hip and thigh. The Velvet aimed to make the brunette breathless before they’d taste her womanhood.

As the former returned to her lips again, they savoured the flavour whereas their palm slithered between her inner thighs. When their fingers moved across her wetness, the woman hummed into Juhyun’s mouth, searching for air — a vocal sigh was ready to emerge under the sensations. 

They wanted to hear her voice, needed to learn how she would moan, and so they brought more of her juice on their digits and crossed them over the most sensitive dot, pressing and fluttering around it in search of the pleasurable feeling.

It was building fast; so fast, Seungwan was not ready for this. She got a dragging hot heaviness growing between the limbs as those swift and clever fingers danced over her raw nerves. It spread over her frame, and she didn’t know where to hide from those sensations as she tossed and turned on the bed.

What happened next was an out of the body experience. Juhyun was no more over her, but between her legs, their mouth pressed firmly to her core with tongue flicking at the clit. The woman yelped in surprise as the bolt of pleasure struck her, coming straight from Juhyun’s fleshy tip up to her crown; her back arched in the most visually thrilling way while her hands rummaged around looking for something to anchor to.

As Seungwan found herself whine she bit into her hand, quaking under the constant waves of rush washing over with every movement of the raven’s lips and tongue.

“Lift it away, I want to hear you,” Juhyun growled and carefully slid one finger into the woman’s excessive tightness. As soon as they started slowly moving in and out, they bowed again and resumed the feast.

It didn’t take long for Seungwan to reach her orgasm — that rough organ was truly sweltering. Bright colours appeared under her lids, and the girl’s lungs inflated with fire as she howled and gasped anon. That heaviness she had been amassing exploded into millions of raptures and plunged her into the seventh heaven of delight.

While Seungwan was returning to reality, Juhyun had knelt between her thighs and put their hands on her tight stomach, gliding along and enjoying her skin. She was so lost in herself it brought animalistic satisfaction to the raven. They watched their palm flowed down and traced the mellow swells that begged for more attention. Their penis throbbed in agreement and, guided to her entrance, brushed against inviting wetness, feeling the heat.

“Juhyun-ssi...” Seungwan croaked and her lover trembled at the sound. They crawled on top of her, touching her every curve with their body, and caressed her chin ever so lightly, placing painfully silken kisses all over her face.

“Call me Juhyun-ah,” the Velvet asked and pressed their mouth to the corner of her lips. “Please...”

Her cheeks were flushed enough but when Seungwan received the plea, she reddened even more — as if saying Juhyun’s name like that would be much more intimate than what they were doing now. She embraced them as tightly as she could, having them rock their hips against her while kissing. For some reason, she wanted to cry; her heart beat so vigorously she could touch it with her fingertips.

“Seungwan-ah...” Juhyun purred as they squeezed their cheek against hers. The raven swayed more, their sex rubbing on the girl’s lower regions with clear determination. They whispered into her ear, “I want to... come onto you... May I?”

They didn’t have to ask as she was ready to do everything Juhyun would demand. Seungwan hummed and ran her fingers through their hair. Juhyun might kill her with their own hands, and she would not flinch. 

“Tell me.”

“Come... on me, Juhyun... ah,” it was embarrassing but also unco hot to say both things. 

“Oh, Seungwan,” the raven leeched to her lips, torturing over and over again while they searched for discharge. Soon, they seated themselves up swiftly, hand gripping and stroking their shaft as soft moans escaped their throat.

Juhyun was so beautiful: black mane draping around their shoulders, chest rising and falling with fast shallow breaths while skin sparkled with sweat — they looked godlike and Seungwan couldn’t take eyes off of them. The way Juhyun bent their brows, the way their lips parted and tongue licked at them, their hand clasped at her side — everything was breathtaking. Yet there was something that the brunette couldn’t bear — the gaze; Juhyun’s gaze, boring deep into her as the Velvet stared at her with an unexplainable mixture of adoration, warmth, yen and lewdness.

“Seung... wan...”

Thick cream harshly poured onto her belly as the elder’s face contorted into the visual dream of delight. With a ragged breath, their eyes moved to the created art. 

“Ah sh... You’re so hot, Wannie...” 

Every time they called her name, the woman bloomed. Was it always like this? Was it the same five years ago or did it appear just recently? She was not sure, but she knew she craved to hear them calling her forever.

Juhyun suddenly stood up and walked away. They returned right after with napkins and wiped the seed off. Despite the view being very arousing, they wanted to play more things without making a mess. 

Then the raven touched her anew. Kissed her anew. Excited her to extra heights again before positioning themselves at her entrance at last. 

“Be gentle... Please,” the girl breathed out, already feeling too much because of the petting, yet longing for more. 

The elder stilled in disbelief.

“You... haven’t done this before?” 

“N-ne,” she sent them a tender eye, and it drilled an immense hole in their chest, that instantly filled with an ocean of endearment.

“Ah, Wannie.”

Her body dematerialised as her lover heaped it with their kisses and caresses. Even if she wanted to do the same to them, she was not able to — they cascaded all the love of this universe over her tiny frame, shone all the warmness over her skin, and she bathed in their light, their arms and their essence.

Juhyun slid a finger into her, then added a second one and waited for her to extend before putting out. Their other hand got busy with her clit as they entered her again and again, working her up quickly.

“Look at me,” the elder murmured and tentatively pressed their tip into the wetness unfolding under the intrusion. They bent over and observed her as they moved deeper, trying to catch any signs of pain. 

“You are so wet, I like it,” they continued, meeting nearly no resistance. She was so tight it was almost a punishment to go at such a snail’s pace.

“N-ng-wait,” the woman pushed at their shoulders as discomfort rose inside.

Her partner froze, but their cock didn’t — it still throbbed for continuation. They readjusted position by putting the girl’s legs around their waist, receiving the sweetest gaze from her, and Juhyun’s heart melted right to the ground.

“Juhyun-ah,” she crooned, and the raven dipped their head to kiss her. 

“You smell like blue oranges on the snow,” the elder said upon her lips and got her smiling.

“...Do those exist?” 

She leaned in for another buss, but the Velvet tilted their neck, avoiding the touch.

“Right now.” They pushed again and slid into the depth, their length covered by pleasant tightness. Her walls were stretching as Seungwan was getting used to the size, muscles twitching delightfully. “Ah, woah... sshit...”

Granted how she took them, the girl was fortunate to have no pain. Juhyun cradled her face one last time before rising above her and spreading her legs a little wider. Still being careful, the raven moved back until they left her and then thrust in again, watching with delectation how their member disappeared in her heat. They hummed and sighed with appreciation at the repeated action until the woman was taking them with no opposition at all.

As their palms crossed her thighs to the waistline, she became even waxier in their hands. Juhyun cupped her breasts that swayed under the impulse, and she grabbed their forearms, digging her nails into them. Oh, how much they loved how her body talked.

Velvets’ skin differed from that of a human also in a way the rubbing was more sensible, meaning pleasures beyond imagination to both sides. That’s why the brunette got to the top of the world in no time. She had heard women saying their first times were awful, and the following times brought little to no pleasure until they started enjoying sex after. But what she was experiencing now had no resemblance to that at all.

Seungwan failed to notice she moaned when Juhyun found a spot inside her and was constantly hitting it. The raven’s steady pace drew the most beautiful sounds out of the woman. They enjoyed how her eyes screamed seduction whenever she could open them and focus on their own; how her jaw hung ajar, gasping for the air; how she pawed about Juhyun’s body every time she could reach it; how helplessly her hips rolled to meet the thrusts. 

Brown hairs stuck to her forehead as she swung her head back and to the side, vulnerable and pleading expression over her — she felt bliss impending. It spurred Juhyun, and they bent to cover her and attacked her neck. They pumped harder, sensing how she turned uncontrollable, clenching around them, making them growl and groan.

Seungwan came with a sonorous wail that rang in Juhyun’s ears for several minutes after. She tried to distance, but the raven enlaced her in their arms and pistoned until she reached heights again, a silent scream on her lips. Her body arched and strung with severe shudders, and only then Juhyun released her from the iron grip. She was so wild; so _natural._

Her lover lay beside and revelled in the state Seungwan was in, captured by her very being. People were most sincere when out of control, when all their masks fell and they were left with only pure souls. 

The elder was so immersed in contemplation they missed the girl coming from the kingdom of delight. Only when her fingers brushed across their lips, the raven snapped back to reality.

“Mmm, how do you feel, Seungwan-ah?” They asked, dissolving into the caress.

“I thought... I’d go blind,” she answered with a tired chuckle. 

“That’s not what I meant but my ego is higher than the skies now,” Juhyun smiled and kissed her palm. “It didn’t hurt, did it?”

The woman shook her head ‘no’. Her cheeks dusted with red hues even more as she whispered, “It was... great.”

“Little lucky girl.”

She didn’t answer; her browns glanced down and returned to pink-amethyst ones fast, although with a curious spark in them. Juhyun’s face lit with a cocky smile.

“Want to touch?”

Seungwan rolled her eyes in sham annoyance but then nodded meekly.

“Come onto my lap and do whatever you wish,” the Velvet said as they sat up and leaned back on their arms, legs outstretched. “Now.”

“Oh, so imperious, Juhyun-ssi,” the woman spoke in a luring voice when she appeared where her companion wanted her.

“Shh!” Their eyes sparkled formidably, though only for a moment as their paramour ran her hands over their abdomen up to the chest. The look on her face was ineffable and her touch — torrid.

“It pulsates...” Seungwan mused as her attention shifted to the standing soldier waiting for orders, while her nails lightly scratched at the raven’s hips.

“Mhm...”

“I like that,” she said and watched it shaking again.

“...Mhm...”

“What should I do?” She asked, placing both palms around the phallus and giving it a good hug. The girl seemed excited as she unhurriedly slid her hands up and down Juhyun’s length. She peeked at the latter, “Like this?”

“HM...” The Velvet hummed in a higher pitch, fixing the younger with a gimlet eye.

Feeling encouraged by the reaction, Seungwan explored that interesting device. She padded the head with fingertips and rubbed it after, her other hand producing minor strokes at the base. As Juhyun tightened their body at her action, she continued, very much eager to find out more. The tip was oozing a viscous liquid, and she spread it across with a thumb, earning a sigh from her lover.

“Am I still doing it right?” She inquired and caressed again. She twined her fingers and enclasped silken girth between her palms, thumbs hitting their end time and again.

“MHM...” Juhyun’s assented in falsetto as they dropped to their elbows.

Seungwan was doing well considering her callowness even though the raven was an easy target feeling everything twice as intense as humans.

“Sssit on me,” the Velvet begged as they let their back fall onto the floor with a thump. “S-slowly, it still may hurt.”

They viewed the girl as she left their organ and glided her hands over their stomach, then lifted herself up. Juhyun guided her with their hands and gasped when they saw her fluids running down their cock as she descended.

“Fuck, fuck, _fu-uh-ck_ ,” the sight was tremendously salacious, but the brunette shot her lover a quizzical look. 

“You are SO _fucking_ wet and TIGH-,” the elder yelled with an angry inflection.

The woman bit her lip — she did not expect herself being so flustered.

“Don’t... don’t stop, Seungwan-ah, move, please,” the raven steered her hips, showing how she could wend and when the girl compassed it, they lay back, immersed in senses.

Lissome, supernal, voluptuous; her body curved and waved like a nymph while she moved, firm muscles danced under the porcelain skin of her middle as her nails dipped stronger into Juhyun’s torso. Her neck tilted and head swayed when delicious moans escaped her magical lips. 

The elder pulled her and kissed, seized her butt with both hands and stilled her only to thrust on their own.

“Juhyun-uh...” She groaned and her skull fell next to the raven’s, her fingers holding fast to the bedding.

This was what they dreamt of. The Velvet jammed the younger in their arms as they became rougher. The girl yauped.

“J-J… hyu-u-u-n-n......“

Seungwan would have wriggled out as her back bent sharply, but the raven held her in place. Dense tremors overspread her body and she cried out in ecstasy.

“Yes, Wannie,” Juhyun murmured and gouged further. They tilted their head to have fiery breaths on their ear and hurled all effort into giving her another orgasm.

Even her toes shivered when she hit the blue with a head tone to her voice breaking into ultrasound. And a rattling feeling washed over the Velvet as they went off several heartbeats later, spilling the pool under the maddening contractions.

Somewhere outside the building crickets chirred to each other, probably discussing the foolish flies swirling around the streetlights. The heat those were searching for was imitative unlike the one shared between the duo sprawled out on the floor after the dash. The room was filled with the smell of sex and sounds of frequent sighs. Some candles burned out, veiling the place under mysterious shadows.

Juhyun loosened the grip on Seungwan, who tendered and let the tears stream down her yet crimson face. Silky hands caressed and cradled her as the raven shifted them both to the side. 

“...Omo!” They gasped, brushing brown hairs from the girl’s forehead. “What’s it? Did I hurt you?” 

They placed soft kisses to her cheeks and temples and eyes. 

“No,” Seungwan sighed almost inaudibly, cuddling her partner. “I’m... wasted...”

Juhyun reciprocated the hug and pressed their nose to her neck, “Sowwy.”

She stroked their hair in silence, breathing in the earthy fragrance and trying to calm her heart down. Her lover purred with pleasure and liquefied in Seungwan’s arms. They planted a sweet peck to the woman’s shoulder, whereupon reached out to brush her side.

“No,” the woman shuddered under their hand, and the Velvet jerked away. “I will lose my mind if you keep touching me. It’s too much... Juhyun-ssi...”

“You’re too much, Wannie,” the raven replied in a gentle voice. Sat up. “I’ll go grab something-”

They never finished a sentence and just stared at the girl.

“Something?” 

“Eung?”

“You said you’d go grab something,” she reminded and expected elaboration. 

“Ah, ah! Something to drink. I have nothing here.”

Juhyun glanced at the woman again and stood up. They dressed, though struggled to conceal the boner, and quit the chamber.

Once they were back with a carafe full of water, they noticed Seungwan at the same spot, curled in the bedding and watching them filling two cups.

“I thought you’d leave,” the elder hummed once they sat beside the girl and grazed her naked body with eyes; they offered her a utensil.

She shot them a humble look, “Do you want me to?” 

Her voice was small and a little shaky.

“No,” Juhyun waited as she drank the water, then took the cup. “Stay.”

Seungwan was so tiny, so precious — absolutely “I won’t let you go” type. The Velvet returned the vessels to their place and lay beside the woman, covered her with a blanket and stared at her. She gazed back. It felt so natural to be in such intimacy, though neither from the couple understood how they escalated their relationship this fast.

“I still want you, Seungwan-ah,” whispered the elder, amazed by a powerful desire they had for her. “What are you doing to me?”

She hid under the blanket, leaving only the upper part of her face peeking out, eyes glowing with softness and a silent plea.

“Let me at least kiss you,” Juhyun puckered, but the younger shook her head in denial. The Velvet quirked their brow and leaned in closer. “Just one peck, Wannie...”

They tugged at the cloth and uncovered her mouth; minimised the distance and breathed out again, “Let me kiss you.”

Seungwan’s cheeks burned from that only motion. Her defence was breaking, and she unintentionally licked her lips — something that didn’t go unnoticed by the raven.

“Seungwanie, my Seungwanie, let me taste you,” Juhyun hovered close to her. 

“No,” it was a last try of resistance, and it worked for the Velvet rolled back onto their spine and sighed.

“Sorry, something’s wrong with me,” they said, gathered some tresses of their hair to sniff. 

“May I... ask a personal question?” Seungwan’s voice came out after a while as she watched the most beautiful profile ever.

Juhyun hummed and inhaled the scent again.

“How do you... morph?”

The raven released the black lints and rested their hands on their stomach, eyes looking at the ceiling.

“I don’t know. Nobody does. Our bodies transform according to the person’s perceptions. Well, when I’m around people, I am in my original form, but as something changes — I morph.” The Velvet fell into silence and pondered for a bit. “Usually it’s the physical contact that triggers it, but sometimes it happens distantly.”

“What if several people with different perceptions touch you?” 

“Sexual intention affects. And we don’t allow much touching in general unless we want that, Seungwan-ah,” the elder turned their head and looked at the girl. “Moreover, most of the times women perceive us as men and vice versa. Yerimie is in a minority.”

Brown eyes narrowed under a smile.

“She likes girls,” the woman uttered. “Maybe that matters...”

“Hm, I met people who liked both sexes but still my body morphed into one,” Juhyun turned away again and fixed their gaze at the void. “They say we are a better version of humans: we don’t have illnesses, we are universal, possess traits of both genders, understand both of them...” 

The raven took in a deep and long breath and held it for several seconds.

“But how am I a better version if I even can’t control my morphing? People do. And then use that to their advantage… Call us mutants.”

The tune to their voice made Seungwan’s heart shrink with sympathy. She snaked her hand from under the blanket and placed it on Juhyun’s shoulder.

“You’re not a mutant… Just different. There’s nothing wrong in being different.”

The raven faced her again. There was something in her gaze they couldn’t decipher, but their chest swelled with the warmest feeling at this remark.

“I wasn’t morphing around you until today,” Juhyun confessed. “I don’t know why. You aroused me so much that night, I was ashamed for jumping you. I thought you were innocent and had no sexual intentions. But you had. Sassy.”

The girl set her arm back under the cover while her cheeks gained some pinkish tints. The elder studied her. She had such beautiful elongated eyes with rather big irises, that hid under the dark lashes every time she blinked. They shimmered brightly as if she viewed a star and not Juhyun, while her hair scattered around her head. Seungwan looked so adorable, the raven experienced an urge to gather her in their arms and never let go.

They smiled to this thought, and the corners of her mouth tightened up in response. Her overlip was a literal definition of a bow: it curved so perfectly and had such a sensual outline, it was impossible not to wish for it. Juhyun reached out a hand and feathered a finger against her top fold.

It had been so long since they stayed in bed with someone after sex yet along had a possibility to behold them. And it had been even longer since they wanted anybody to. They had never imagined that anyone would be Seungwan, though. This whole situation still felt off the wall, but they were sunny being a part of it.

The flesh under their fingertip moved, as the woman spoke, “Would you like to spend a day with me tomorrow?”

Her fiery breath scraped against their skin, and Juhyun got a pulling sensation in the groin again. 

“I’d love to,” their digit skimmed across the younger’s chin. She smiled and her eyes crinkled, forming deep bruises in the elder’s heart without their realisation. 

The Velvet wormed their way to Seungwan, then pushed her onto her back and loomed over; her brows bent within a second, and she gasped through parted lips. Juhyun covered her throat with a hand, pressing just enough to still the girl as they opened her mouth wider with theirs. They twitted her, drizzled with light touches, never allowing her to capture them in a proper kiss. Her neck strained at yet another attempt, and as she failed, her hands seized the raven’s head.

The tip of Juhyun’s tongue ran across her upper lip, then sank deep behind her cheeks, and the woman felt excitement travelling all over her lower body. A familiar nagging pain settled between the legs, demanding recognition. The Velvet was indeed reading her mind as their hand moved from her throat under the blanket to her core.

“Oh, you like it so much,” the raven whispered between the kisses. “You’re soaking my fingers.”

Their talking made her even more whipped up, and Juhyun noted that, smiling into her lips. 

“My naughty Wannie…”

She gasped and craned her neck back.

“…Is so responsive.”

The woman bit her lip and stiffened a moan.

“Sings so sweetly under my touch…”

She pulled Juhyun’s hair in desperation.

“…And is so exquisite coming for me.”

The girl warbled and tried to push her lover away, but ended clasping them in her arms.

“Like the Moon in the sky.”

“Hyun~”

“My little moon...”

“Oh-Hyun- _ah_!”

“Shine for me, Wannie.”

_Shine_.


	8. Chapter 8

Early morning. Nature just had started waking up. A baby lizard climbed onto a stone, looked around and tasted the air with its tongue. It was cool, a bit dump, but overall very pleasant. The reptile blinked slowly, spotting something with its eye and rushed after it circling the corner of the building. 

The place was serene, apart from one room, where a young woman came to her senses after a restless, but splendid night.

Seungwan lazily opened her lids. Her body hurt and especially did her crotch. It was not severe pain, but a plain soreness, that evoked images of a titillating kind. Her heart stilled as the girl registered a warm figure pressed to her spine. She raised herself to slip out from under the blanket she shared with her lover.

Juhyun rested on their side, and Seungwan could only see their back moving with the wafts of the raven’s breathing. Even though they were dressed, she lapped them in the cover and stood up to take a cup of water. She shivered as her naked body met with the chill. Producing no sounds, the woman poured in the liquid and drank it. Oh _finally_! So refreshing. So reviving!

The brunette exhaled with relief but then gasped in surprise, being enclasped in the Velvet’s arms.

They forced her to their front and whispered into her ear, “Wannie.”

It felt like she was slapped — her entire frame shuddered, and her gut exploded with hundreds of fires.

“Morning, Seungwan-ah. How did you sleep?” The elder nuzzled her hair. “You smell so good.”

The woman squirmed and sought freedom from the searing limbs but to no avail.

“Good morning, Juhyun-ssi,” came out in a sigh. “I was out like a light after you parched me.”

“Mhm, I love to hear that,” they murmured and pecked her crown. “I’m thirsty, too. Give me a drink.”

The raven unbraced her and moved beside her. She filled the cup and held it out.

“No,” they shook their head and pouted. “Out of your hands.”

Juhyun bent down a little and waited for her to bring a vessel to their lips. My, how hard her organ was beating in her chest! For some reason, she was sent into a tizzy. The duo maintained intense eye contact throughout the process, and when the Velvet finished drinking they puckered up their mouth in a carefree way.

“Thank you~” They chirped and gambolled towards their bed, started folding it. They gave a quick slant to Seungwan. “I will be very demanding today, be prepared. You have to compensate for the time you avoided me, Wannie.”

The girl cracked a smile.

“Ne, Juhyun-ssi.” 

She picked up her clothes and began dressing.

“Wait!” The elder halted their activity and floated to the brunette. “I stripped you and I’ll dress you.”

They yanked her garbs from her fists and knelt.

“This is as intimate as undressing. Maybe, even more,” Juhyun cooed and stroked her calf, urging her to lift a leg so they could put it in the trouser. As she followed the behest, the elder kissed her thigh and caressed her skin with their fingertips. They repeated with her other limb and when they tied pants at the waistline, the raven pressed their lips to the spot over her bellybutton.

“Ju-huyn,” the younger moaned and twiddled with the black streams of silken waterfall.

“Hmm,” their hands slid to her back, and she twitched as a tender petal. 

Juhyun smooched her for some time, then stood up and put the shirt onto the woman, finishing with a doting buss to her forehead. They smiled.

“Shall we neaten?”

Staring at the partner with glistening eyes, Seungwan nodded and almost felt her heart jump out of her chest. 

“Come back when you are ready, okay?” Juhyun resumed folding the bed, and when she left the room they spaced out.

Perturbation spread all over them as they questioned themselves whether what they had done was right. 

They had sex with Wannie, the girl they had taken under their wing. Was it virtuous to sleep with her? Obviously, she did not have any problems with that as she started everything herself, but was Juhyun supposed to stop her? What was the reason for her to advance them in the first place? Was Seungwan just curious about sex? Or sex with the Velvet? 

The raven went to clean themselves. Even if she was, by all means, curious, shouldn’t they have stopped her? But then why should they? They definitely found her attractive and extremely seductive, otherwise, they wouldn’t have been so hyped for her. Seungwan grew up, transformed from a caterpillar into a beautiful butterfly and now charmed everyone with her magnetism. Juhyun was no exception. And to tell the truth, they didn’t want to be one. 

They should clear their mind from all the patterns of perception developed for the young woman and start taking her as she was right now. She had changed and so did they. What’s more, the Velvet liked those changes. 

And they liked being her first partner. For whatever reason, it made them feel special. It meant she not only wanted them but also trusted. They had to be careful as to not discredit this trust. 

When back to the room, Juhyun swept it with their gaze. The cake Seungwan had baked for them was still on the table, and they decided to grab a piece or two. It was delicious and from now on they would like the girl to bake it for them more often. 

Although the raven didn’t know what the future held for them, while being around the brunette, they wanted to take all from it.

Juhyun downed the entire treat in one breath. Pictures of recent events were brought to their mind as they licked the last morsels of cream from their lips. Did Seungwan like it when they mouthed her fingers? The Velvet unquestionably did. They should try again today. Yes, a _very good_ idea.

The raven spent half of the morning tidying up and the other half mooning about the backyard. They felt jittery and, in some way, hot to trot when they thought about the whole day filled with the warm, soft, sexy girl. Juhyun was looking forward to whatever they would do together, but most of all they wanted to diddle Seungwan again. In addition, they had to find out why they morphed so tardily around her. 

It was not a terrible thing per se, just atypical. The Velvets were not morphing with each other but always did with people and as a rule, it was instant. But Juhyun never had experienced morphing in delay. Was it because of Seungwan or her hidden feelings? The raven had no control over their body, so it had to be her and whatever she felt for them.

“Juhyun-ah!”

They looked over their shoulder, squatting at some unknown flower, and noticed Seulgi dragging their legs towards them.

“Morning, my dear,” the elder murmured and rose up to face their friend.

The younger suddenly put them in a tight hug.

“I miss you,” the bear-like one mumbled and rubbed their cheek against Juhyun’s. 

With the motion, softly rang their bell-earrings. Seulgi wore them on specific days, known only to themselves. Even Juhyun had no idea when would be the next time.

“We haven’t seen each other for two nights,” the elder said when they broke the embrace. They studied the younger Velvet for a moment.

“And still I miss you,” Seulgi smiled, their bright eyes no more visible under the squinting lids.

Juhyun beamed back and kissed their mate on the forehead.

“Let’s draw together sometime,” they suggested, watching how the younger’s face glowed even more. 

“Ne!” The taller nodded, slicked Juhyun’s hair near the ear and ran their hand through it till the ends. “What are you doing here, by the way?”

The elder used a moment of silence, enjoying the touch.

“Viewing the flowers. And you? It’s too early, you never wake up at this hour.”

Seulgi gazed at their friend — they were not telling something. Though, they did it all the time. 

“I’m going fishing with Yerim-ah. She said she had found the rods, so we can go today.”

“At noon?”

“Yeah? Early mornings are better, but I hate them. Besides, fishing takes time, and we will cook and eat as well.”

Juhyun laughed. Of course, everything should be accompanied with food if it was about Seulgi. 

“Tell her I asked her to take care of you, otherwise you’ll gulp that fish raw.”

The younger chuckled and jabbed their mate at the shoulder.

“Yah, I’m not barbaric!”

“Yah!” The elder struck a blow of their own. “Don’t ‘yah’ at me!”

Another Velvet chortled, “Oh I see the Old-hyun has awakened.”

“Oosh!” Juhyun hauled off their hand in a threatening fashion as their eyes lit with flickers of feigned anger.

The raven bear giggled even louder but stepped aside in case a punch would come their way.

“Seulgi-ya,” the elder started in a small voice after a while. “Have you ever morphed with a delay?”

“What do you mean?” They asked, surprised by the shyness of their pal.

“Ah... Like, not morphing under the touch right away? But much, much later?”

“Huh?” Seulgi rolled their eyes up to the side and tried to recall anything. “I think this never happened to me.”

Juhyun puckered their lips and nodded, their eyebrows jumped up desolately.

“Either they were not interested at first, or I don’t know, actually,” the junior added as they observed the expressions on the opposite face change.

“They _were_ , but still...” The elder mused and ran a hand through their hair. “Anyways, thanks.”

“No problem, Juhyunie,” Seulgi stroked the mate’s shoulders, then spoke again. “I’ll go to Yerim-ah. She’ll bite my head off if I am late.”

“Mhm,” they hummed and gave a half-suppressed laugh. “You better hurry.”

“Ne~” The younger sang out, leaving.

When Juhyun finished watching their friend disappear from the sight, they resumed the task of admiring the flower. They peeked at the sky covered with fluffy white clouds. The disc was high and hot, and the Velvet enjoyed the warmth it distributed. 

One once said ‘as above, as below’, but humanity tried hard not to associate with that. The sun, the moon and everything above were nonjudgemental — the stars shone equally for everyone on this planet. People below were different — they envied, hated, fought, killed; they were ugly. Skies were beautiful. If Juhyun could, they would like to become a part of those one day.

But at present, their little moon took shape and showed her way to them with a soft smile on her lips. Her pastel dark blue skirt was embroidered with flowers and butterflies at the bottom and waved with her every step. A light creamy shirt was decorated with a wide ribbon of the same colour as the skirt and with tiny pale petals.

Would she stop becoming more beautiful with each hour? Juhyun’s heart was jammed with a feeling of indescribable force, and the raven hiccupped as their breath was taken away by the belle.

Seungwan put a hand to her mouth to secrete a laugh, but her eyes glinted with gaiety. When she came closer, Juhyun lurched forward to cup her face and kiss her but stopped midway. Her brows knit up, and she sent them an interrogative look while her lips parted in soundless question. She was giddying.

Giddying to the point Juhyun sprang to her and drew her into a searing buss. Live today, kiss today; die and think about it tomorrow. She was here now, she was responding and she puled so sweetly into their lips, they felt intoxicated. Juhyun couldn't understand how they had failed to notice how magnificent she was until Seungwan started enchanting them. She was a siren, no less. And they would follow her voice to the end of the earth.

"N-nuhyun-ah," the woman hummed, pushing the raven away. She swallowed heavily, exhaled broken air and put her fingers to her burning lips.

Juhyun licked the corner of their mouth and fixed the girl with their original stare that always torched everything to ashes. Not that Seungwan wasn't already ashes.

She slid her eyes down Juhyun's face to their chest, then to her feet, abashed.

"We... could have been seen," she uttered in half a whisper.

The elder raked over the place, noticing no one, then looked back at the girl.

"Are you ashamed of me?"

"What? No!" She fired like a shot with a wild cast.

"Then why?" 

Seungwan felt turning red and she hid her face in her palms.

"You're too... too erotic," she spoke indistinctly.

"Hmm," Juhyun purred and clasped her forearms, pushing them away, lifted her chin. "I'm erotic, huh? You haven't seen yourself with my eyes, Wannie. The one erotic here is _you_."

With that, they bussed her with choking passion, then ended the kiss sharply, provoking the woman to gasp for their lips. Juhyun's smirk was sinful when they pecked her again and brushed the sides of her jaw and neck with the back of their fingers.

For the past 12-16 hours, Seungwan had experienced so many feelings and physical sensations she had never done before in her whole life. She did want to feel the touch of the raven, but she never thought she would be evanescing from that every time. It seemed the closer the brunette was getting to Juhyun, the more they were burning her to the ground. 

The girl didn't know what she should do. When was she supposed to tell them she liked them? Wouldn't she scare them off? A perfect time must exist for this purpose. Seungwan had just to catch it.

"Were you coming to meet me?" The Velvet asked, playing with the brown hairs.

"Ye... But you're here."

"I met Seulgi. They went fishing with Yerimie."

"I know," the woman sighed, melting into the touch.

"What do you want to do?"

It did not matter what they would do. Seungwan simply wanted to be around Juhyun, splash in their sunlight, see them, feel them; live in their warmth.

"Could we just... walk? Somewhere?" The younger asked, peering into the only.

"A purposeless journey? Sounds good to me," they smiled, and Seungwan got blinded. "Let me take my sword and we can go."

“Do you always carry it?” The girl inquired as the duo headed to the Velvet’s room.

“Mhm. When I’m out.”

“Why?”

“Some feel threatened when they see me, so I have to defend myself in case of an attack.”

“But... why?”

“Ah, Wannie... For many reasons. Some believe we still should be slaves, for others we’re mutants to be destroyed. And so on.” 

“Sorry...”

“Don’t mind it. There are people who also welcome us,” they entered their chamber and picked the weapon as well as the mantle and gloves. “By the way, I’ve eaten the cake.”

Seungwan’s face lightened up with a jovial smile.

“I’m glad you liked it.”

“It’s the first present from you. I liked it very much,” the elder answered and patted the woman’s butt as they prompted her to move forward.

Seungwan flinched and jumped in astonishment.

“Juhyun-ssi!”

“What?”

The younger shot them a screaming look, but the raven only shrugged; their mouth contorted into a lopsided smile as they put on the gloves.

“Oh my gosh, you’re so-“ She exclaimed, but did not find words to finish the sentence.

“So what?” Juhyun raised a brow and peeked sideways at the woman when both were out on the street.

“Perverted!” 

The elder gasped as if offended.

“I tapped slightly!”

Seungwan swung her head and looked at them with disbelief.

“Tapped? Slightly? You...” She did a grasping motion with her hand, emphasising it with her facial expression.

“I have no recollection of that,” the Velvet replied and pouted innocently.

Her face elongated even more with shock. But when Juhyun wreathed with a smile Seungwan could not hold herself from doing the same.

Once the couple reached the main street thronged with people, the elder locked their fingers with the one of their flame. 

“Are you hungry?” They asked smelling something delicious.

“Ne, but can I treat you?”

The raven cast her a glance.

“Why?”

“You always treat me, I want to do the same.”

“Hm... all right, Seungwanie. Regale me today,” they smiled and led the woman into the crowd.

***

The sound of the river lapping against the banks was calming. Juhyun was lolling on the ground with their eyes closed, feet crossed and bare hands resting on their stomach. As Seungwan sat nearby and feasted her browns on the raven, she crooned to them, stroking their black locks soothingly. The Velvet was in the heavens, among the moon, the sun and their favourite stars.

“Do you know I can feel my hair the same way you feel your skin?” They asked and sensed Seungwan paused for a second.

“Oh.”

“Don’t stop, please, it’s very relaxing,” they moved the girl’s hand with their own. “Seulgi and I sometimes brush each other’s hair. It’s like receiving a full-body massage, but better. Much, much better.”

Her caress became even softer, and Juhyun almost whirred with pleasure.

“How do you cut it then?” Curiousness drenched her tone.

“With blood and tears.”

The brunette froze and gaped at her companion whose face broke into a smirk, “I’m joking.”

They received a soft punch to the shoulder that livened them up.

“Did you know we are sterile? Except for when it’s a new or a full moon. On those days we also can cut hair without pain.”

“So... you make children under a full moon? Quite romantic, I’d say,” Seungwan replied in a mellow voice.

Juhyun tittered.

“Sort of. If it wasn’t that difficult to match the cycle in case a human partner is a woman.”

“Ye,” she mouthed thoughtfully. “Do you... have offsprings?”

“No. You?” To that, the younger chuckled and sighed a smile matching the one over the raven. “Anyway, did you know we are stayers?”

“What do you mean?” The girl twisted the hairs a little.

“It means I can do it as many times as you want,” Juhyun articulated pointedly and opened their eyes to look at the woman.

“Oh...” Her cheeks flushed.

“What did you like the most?”

“Hm?”

The elder sat up and inched to Seungwan.

“The sex. What did you like?” They got a load of her. “I liked everything. I enjoy watching very much. Hearing as well, but watching more. That’s why I was off my trolley when I saw you leaking.”

 _Why_? Why they were doing this to her! The brunette wanted to disappear into thin air.

“Don’t be so shy, Wannie. You came on me and moaned into my ear,” they took her hand in theirs. “Tell me what you liked.”

As she was not answering, Juhyun slowly kissed her fingertips, one after one; eyes anchored to hers tenaciously.

“Would you do a thing for me?” They asked and drew out the precious wooden box. “Repeat what you did back then.”

The raven extracted a leaf and held it with a curious expression on the face; and with a shade of hope.

Something changed in her gaze, and as Seungwan coiled their wrist with her fingers, she tackled the request.

Juhyun could watch this over and over again, and it would never be enough for them. They felt disconnecting from their body as her tongue washed over their digits and she pulled in the leaf.

Quickly she unhanded the elder and chewed the green ball, her browns avoiding meeting Juhyun’s pink and amethyst.

“Give it to me,” the raven asked, though it seemed their every request was more of an order, and the girl couldn’t disobey.

She picked a leaf up, and the way Juhyun hugged her hand with their palm sent goosebumps all over her body. 

“Keep looking at me.”

Her fingers sank in the humid heat, her gut tingled and eyes rammed into the Velvet’s mouth as she sensed the latter’s tongue vibrating and swaying over her pads. Seungwan recalled them between her legs, and instantly her thighs clenched tighter. 

She would die if she didn’t kiss them. When she leaned in, and their face was in her hands they smirked. When the brunette pressed her lips to theirs, they still smirked. When she won their tongue and brought them down to her knees it was not humorous any more.

The girl was leading this time. Exploring. Discovering and obliterating after. Her hand slid over their left ear and her fingertips caressed behind it. How a drop of water splashed and scattered all over the surface, the same way ice-hot sensations spread all over Juhyun’s head, making them moan into her lips.

An obscuring force eclipsed her at that moment and she moved her mouth to that same ear, bussed the elder’s tragus, causing them to squeeze their eyes so hard, they saw colourful circles under their lids. Unaware of what she was doing to them, Seungwan felt she had to lick their helix.

“A-ah-“ Juhyun quivered and grabbed the back of the girl’s head, restraining the movements. With a colossal effort, the raven breathed out a plea.

This time it, in fact, sounded like a request. Deep inside the brunette walked on air as she had just divulged she did possess some power over her lover. She fell out of her mind when she tongued the Velvet’s ear, heard them whining when she toyed with their lobe, sensed them panting as she nibbled and flitted about the sensitive hole.

Juhyun overlooked drooling as they climaxed with a constricted throat crammed with groans. Their bones crushed under the weight of elation. It sapped their strength, and the raven slumped against the girl.

They never morphed yet came under her caress. What hex was it? How could she do something sexual to them and they did not react physically?

The woman held them in her arms until they evened out their breathing. Juhyun wiped their chin from the saliva, and _oh_! They looked embarrassed!

“S-seungwan...”

She placed tender pecks at their both cheeks and poured so much warmth through her eyes, the Velvet could not wrap their brains around it.

“Sorry,” they mumbled under the soft touch of her lips on their brow.

“There is nothing to be sorry for, Juhyun-ssi,” her voice caught them and dragged to the stars. “I liked this.”

The duo stared at each other, hearts beating in ideal unison. If Seungwan wanted to tell something, now would be a perfect time. She only had to open her mouth and let out words, orbiting in her chest.

“Juhyun-ah,” she began and fought for breath because suddenly it was not enough air for her lungs. “I... I’m-“

A sound of bursting thunderstorm made the raven jump, and the girl froze onto their arm out of surprise. Rare drops of rain landed on their foreheads but soon transformed into a full downpour, drenching them through. 

“Oosh!” The Velvet hissed, leapt to the feet and helped the woman. “Where did it come from? The sun was just here!”

“I don’t know,” Seungwan muttered and was hauled away from their spot.

They scooted along the towpath until they reached an alley. The rain was icy, and the sudden wind blew it at an angle, making it hard for the couple to see the way as the water constantly hit their eyes. Their clothes became heavier, and the mud under their feet made them slower in their steps. The walls on both sides of the alley were bare, and there was no sight of anything they could use to hide.

It would not do much, but Juhyun unclasped their mantle and draped it over the girl, pressing her tighter to their side. For some unexplainable reason, the raven felt cheery. They tee-heed under their breath.

“I lost track of time with you, Wannie,” the elder laughed at the revelation. “And I missed the change of the weather.”

They saw people running somewhere, trying to find a cover as well. Some of them held small boxes over their heads, the others tucked necks under the hems of their overcoats. Seungwan spotted a couple dashing to the side.

“Juhyun-ssi,” the younger called, pointing to the other way.

They hummed and veered after the pair of people that had already hidden under the narrow tilt-roof of the wooden gates. Seungwan and Juhyun joined them beneath the cover, exchanging bewildered and playful glances with those.

“It poured out of the blue!” A young lady exclaimed, wringing the water out of her sleeves.

“I told you it would rain! My ears were itchy!” Another woman retorted and looked at Seungwan, who smiled politely at her but was pulled closer to the sturdy gates and pressed into them. Thus the raven hurried to protect her from the gusts.

Her expression changed to the worried one.

“Juhyun-ah!” The brunette whispered. 

“I’m okay. I won’t get ill,” they answered quietly and brushed their hair to one side.

“But you’ll get cold if you don’t step out of the rain!”

“Heat me up then,” the Velvet closed her in a tight hug, wrapping the girl with the mantle.

All three women under the roof blushed. Those of strangers not only had been struck by the beauty of the raven but also almost squealed with excitement at the latter’s action. Juhyun glimpsed at the gals and turned their back to them to block them from the view. 

The downpour rapped steadily on the wood and ground, producing a lullaby of the nature spirits. Seungwan shivered and was tugged even nearer. She sensed Juhyun’s heartbeat at her palm, felt their body that was softer than she remembered. Was it because they were in their natural form? She wondered what they originally looked like, yet thought it would be rude to ask about this.

Juhyun was the same as to the character of their regard, save for the fact they added sexual content to that. At least it was like this for Seungwan. She was one stride closer to the raven now, but still not close enough to her liking. She was greedy; needed all of their attention focused only on her. 

Nevertheless, the brunette understood well that she could not and would never possess the Velvet. They valued freedom in every aspect, and who was she to encroach upon it? If she wanted them to belong to her, she should show them she was worthy of it. And even if they had someone else besides her, she either would accept it or leave them for better. For now, that was how she felt. For now, she just desired them to be with her.

“Juhyun-ah,” Seungwan cooed and turned her face up to look into their eyes. They shone so brightly she thought the sun came out from behind the clouds.

“Mmm?”

“I want... to tell you something.”

The raven cocked a brow and leaned a bit as her voice became smaller. Drops of rainwater slid down their temple.

“I’m all ears,” they murmured, studying her features.

“I th- I... I am enamoured with you, Juhyun-ah.....” She forced out and felt nauseous from extreme fear and anxiety that washed over her.

Would it be the other situation, the elder would cavil about her choice of wording. But what she had just told was too fathomless.

It looked like their heart was stabbed, taken out and replaced by something else. Something that made them go through pain and happiness at the same time. Their mind yelled Seungwan should not fall in love with them. Their soul whispered Juhyun could love her back if they allow themselves. 

It was an unequal, desperate spiritual struggle they were living through at the moment. And it was written all over their face. 

The woman felt close to being heartbroken for the second time in her short life. She was not ready; did not want to be ready. 

“Don’t reject me... please,” she wheezed. The girl failed to stop the tears from obstructing her view as they gathered at her lashes and streamed down her cheeks. Her frame fevered with quivers and it was not because of the cold wetness. “I don’t... need anything. Just let me be with you... whenever you want me to.”

“You must not fall for me,” Juhyun rasped in despair as they brushed her tears away with their hands.

Seungwan shook her head, “I can’t... control my heart.”

“You can’t,” the elder sighed. 

They were not right for her. They were broken, spoiled, foul; they did not deserve her pure love.

But wanted to.

Whatever she was about to say was silenced with Juhyun’s lips.

They could bear it; deal with this knowledge and her feelings. They could lift them away from her shoulders and carry those on their own. Juhyun could not reject her. They would guard her heart that she willingly gave out to them. They would cherish it till their last breath.

And they would try to open their own disabled soul to her.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING

Juhyun held her by the hand as they were walking along the riverside after the rain had stopped. They were cold, but their insides were warmed up by Seungwan’s recent words. They still had to think them over, but now it was time to just enjoy the moment as the two of them headed back to the House of Joy.

The raven felt her palm slipping away from their touch, and then their mantle returned to their shoulders.

“What are you doing?” They asked, taking it off again.

“You’re shivering. Keep it, please,” Seungwan answered in a soft voice and drew the cloth onto the elder’s back. They opened their mouth to protest, but the girl anticipated them. “I’m warm enough for now.”

“Don’t argue,” came out in a commanding tone, and the Velvet wrapped the woman in the cloak. “You can get ill, I won’t. And I’m shivering because I want to kiss you.”

It was a perfect means to shut the brunette down because as soon as she heard the last words her face flushed and she kept her eyes to the ground.

“Let’s quicken, it’ll rain again,” Juhyun checked the gloomy skies and took her palm when they saw two people walking their way. “Do you know where to go from here?”

“There... should be a watermill further down the river and a bridge,” she answered, her grip tightened on their fingers. 

“Mhm.”

The elder frowned at the two strangers on the opposite side of the alley: both had weapons but neither looked like a guard. Something told Juhyun to stop and wait for the men to pass by.

They pulled the woman by her hand, making her turn on the heels, and hugged her, enclasping her head in their palms. She gasped, taken aback, but then the Velvet kissed her with unexplainable thirst, and Seungwan’s heart broke its rhythm.

As the males moved past them, the raven peeked at those, yet there was nothing odd in their behaviour — they spoke about fishing nets and paid almost no attention to the couple being intimate. With a quiet grunt, Juhyun parted from the brunette, dag eyes into her pinkish face. What was that funny feeling they had in their gut?

“You like it, don’t you?” They inquired, seeing her lost gaze. The younger blushed more and received another deep and breathtaking buss. “Me, too. And I’d like to taste other places as well.”

“N-not here,” the girl sighed out, pushing her lover away. They resumed walking, though with some difficulties for her now since her entire body kindled and legs refused to shift.

“Not here,” the elder echoed, looking over their shoulder and realising the strangers were not visible any more. “Good...”

The trail curved down as the duo entered the broadness of the river valley, covered with rare trees and bushes that swayed under the gusts of wind. Here and there thunder played its monstrous music, and the more it neared the pair of people the harder it resonated within their chests, which thrilled at every roaring chord of the spirit of lightning.

Walls and buildings of the town’s side were left far behind, and the air became clearer, opening surrounding noises to the guests that stepped over the thin pathway leading to the watermill. A wooden structure was creaking and whining under the passionate pressure of the water that flowed with urgent calmness. 

A sudden sound made the Velvet turn around, alarmed. They squeezed the cold hand in their palm and raked over the area, perking their ears to a maximum and trying to discern any other disturbance of silence.

“Ju-”

“Sh!” They hissed at her and put a finger to their lips, showing her to keep the mouth shut.

Juhyun seized Seungwan by the wrist and walked her closer to the mill. A bridge to the centre of a town lied several metres away from it, and three people ambled from that way.

Something strange, the elder thought, and slowed their pace.

“Wannie,” they began, kissing her fingers as they cast a glance behind themselves. She drew her concerned browns at them. “I need you to run when I tell you to. Do you understand me?”

Her brows knit together over the rounded eyes. 

“Why?” She asked in a whisper, following the gaze of her companion — they were examining the men with swords that were shortening the distance to them.

“Just do what I say,” came out in the deadliest tone the woman had ever heard.

Juhyun put their free hand on the grip of their sword and kept going along the trail, searching for any other way. They didn’t like those people.

Had they been spied on? Were those here to attack them? If they were to be robbed, the situation would develop differently. It was something else, and the Velvet did not know what it was. But everything inside them screamed alarm.

A whistle flew through space somewhere from the back, and the elder twisted their neck only to realise a group of humans with those two males with a fishnet talk charged onto them from the hill.

“Run,” the raven ordered and launched Seungwan into the dash.

The three strangers crossed the bridge and also sprinted for Juhyun. The latter did not want to fight because of the girl, so they yanked her from the path into the grass field.

They had to run faster, but it was not possible with her by their side. If only they could leave the brunette somewhere safe and lure the pursuers away!

The green, slippery from the recent rain, slowed the couple down but at the same time prevented those men from approaching it quicker.

Suddenly, an arrow swished above the elder’s head, leading them to bump into the woman as they changed the direction. She groaned being about to lose the ground under her feet, but the painful grip on her wrist steadied her. She was gasping for air as her lungs burned and pulse raced. What was going on?

Another missile whizzed to her side, and Juhyun cursed under their breath, tugging her between the trees. 

“Don’t stop,” the Velvet growled, plunging onto a footpath that arose before them after they crossed the field.

They had no clue where this would lead them, but now they needed to retreat from the pursuers as far as possible.

One. Two. Three. Four. Breathe in. Five. Six. Seven. Eight. Breathe out. Repeat. The girl’s steps faltered, and the raven shot her a glance — she would not last long. They had to stop for her sake.

The elder lugged her into the bushes. Bolted deeper into the greenery until they saw a gully. Jumped into it, speeding along its slopes. Pressed Seungwan to the side and covered her mouth with their hand. Listened. She couldn’t breathe, her head fogged, feet buzzed, heart rammed against her chest. What the hell was happening? 

The younger didn’t know. She did not feel her lungs anymore, and the only thing she could think of was her lust for air. Why were they running? From whom?

They were many. Juhyun discerned their footsteps. They were more than ten, armed. And they were coming closer.

Fuck.

A man slipped somewhere above the hiding couple, yelped as he fell into the ravine. His eyes grew bigger when he recognised the Velvet but there was no time for him to produce any sort of sound — a long dagger stabbed his throat with bloody spout following the soul that abandoned the body.

They just killed a person. Seungwan had never seen them doing this before. It was so fast she was not sure she spotted the movement of Juhyun’s hand.

The latter sprinted again, her wrist in their grasp. Snaked their way between the branches, heavy mud and stones. River was somewhere nearby, they heard it again.

An arrow was shot to the brunette’s right out of nowhere and she wailed in pain and horror as it wounded her arm, a straight cut to her sleeve turning red.

 _No_! 

A splash of heated fear welted the elder. She shouldn’t suffer because of them. And everything was developing because of them. Why would so many men hunt an unarmed woman? 

Right.

Once the duo ran into the shallow waters, another feathered shaft was sent after the Velvet and this time it hit the target, causing them to kneel at a sharp ache that spread over their calf.

“RUN!” They commanded, prompting the girl to go to the other side of the river. As she struggled to pull them up, they pushed her away and yelled at her.

She should leave them so they could fight the hunters, for otherwise she would become a hostage. That was unacceptable.

Gratitude to the spirits, their leg was not pierced! The raven rose to the feet and drew their sword at two men that grew before them. They were not attacking, though. Did they need Juhyun alive? 

The latter leapt forward, hand moving up diagonally with a flashing speed as they gashed a man’s throat. The other one howled and aimed to strike. ‘Block, move your left, push, propel and lance,’ the Velvet’s mind signalled while their body obeyed and reacted, respectively. 

In a minute, more men came. More weapons and clanking. More blood. And Juhyun was a wild creature. But they battled with grace. Every movement was fierce and accurate. A new stance followed their every breath. Every beating resulted in a perfectly angled swing. They strove as if it was a dance. 

A dance of death and life.

Until a hair fell from her head.

Seungwan shrieked as a person materialised beside her and tried to grab her. She ducked, tripped up, but managed to dash away from him. She was quick, yet he was quicker. At first, the girl felt him catching onto the mantle but being not fastened it slipped from her shoulders. She heard the man cursing, but the next moment he snatched her hair; pulled her backward so hard her neck cracked. The brunette sought to hit the abuser and twist free, but a powerful slap to her face and a sharp knife pressed to her throat made all her efforts vanish.

And then she was dragged back to the spot where her angel created a massacre.

“One more step and your lass will feed the worms,” someone cried out before the Velvet could make another turn. They shot an eye at Seungwan on the other side of the stream and their blood frothed.

“You killed five of my people, you bitch!” A loud raging voice whaled in the air again. 

Where was he? Juhyun didn’t see him yet. They were surrounded, swords pointing at them. Nine lives. They would have ended them all, but _she_ was a pawn now. 

The Velvet noticed a man flinching towards them and they swept their hand just a bit to scare him back. Their pupils were sharp, optics sensitive to all signals possible. Their body was extremely tight, ready to jump and strike any second. And their mind was clear, open to everything that could come, but their heart rested in her trembling hands.

“Do you remember our small talk?” The giant guy scraped through the circle of his men and smirked maliciously as he caught a look of recognition from Juhyun. “I promised you something, no?”

The raven felt dread creeping into them. It was that bastard that had hurt their Yerimie. 

“I’ve been planning this for so long. But I overlooked your wildness. And now five of my men are dead,” the Giant bared his teeth in a bitter grimace. “You’ll pay for this.”

He rose a hand and gave a cue to his sidekick, who was currently restraining Seungwan. She was pushed forward, but as soon as water lapped her shoes, she stepped on the man’s foot and tried a blow with her elbow. 

It was a moment of surprise for everyone, and Juhyun used it to attack the minion who stood the closest to them. They launched onto another man, cutting off his arm and finishing him before others stormed at them. Somewhere behind the brunette squealed being overpowered again.

“I WILL KILL HER, YOU CUNT!” The Giant bellowed, and Seungwan groaned in response as a knife grazed her throat once again.

“Kill her and I’ll kill all of you,” the Velvet hissed, pointing their sword out to keep the men away.

“I know. That’s why I need her alive,” the Mountain answered, watching his sidekick bringing the girl to his side of the river. “I would have had much more problems with you if she was not here. But how lucky I am today, huh?” The man simpered to himself and skipped towards the woman.

Juhyun moved with an impetuous skip, drawing their weapon from below when it met a strong counterforce of the jumbo. The blades clashed and screeched, yet only for a second as the raven was forced back. With astonishing coordination, the myrmidons instantly jumped onto the Velvet and the tips of their swords loomed at the latter’s face.

The sidekick pressed the knife harder and moved his other arm around Seungwan’s frame, clasping her with strength.

“Relax, I don’t need her. I’m here for you,” the ogre spit.

“Then let her go,” Juhyun spoke out, nostrils flaring from anger as they saw her being in pain and fright.

The Man approached them a little. “I’ll disembowel her if you do something stupid.”

“Let her go,” the raven repeated, almost sensing the ends of those swords picking at their skin.

“No. She will watch,” the Giant roared and his face wreathed with a horrid grin. He turned his head to the girl and looked into her eyes. “It’ll be fun, I promise.” 

He brushed the tip of his blade across her cheek, poked it till a drop of blood appeared on its smooth surface. It was like Juhyun’s heart was prodded. They were ready to move, but the monster-man’s glare stopped them.

And then he struck; his men by the side.

With a hiss, the Velvet swirled and fended off, falling deeper and deeper into new combat. The men blew and pushed them back; hit, causing them to ward off again. Assailed again and anew until the Giant was close enough to kick Juhyun’s knee.

It made them holler. Their leg buckled, and they knelt on the ground. This was not progressing well, they thought, as a massive foot landed on their wrist with a sound crack to the bones. 

Failing to register how their sword slipped from the grip, the raven covered their side from the other kick with crossed hands. It was so powerful it made them fly back and crush on the spine. Numb pain sharked their arms — the right one was definitely broken in several places, while the left quivered under the twinge. This was not going well at all.

The ogre was on top now, strangling them. It felt as if their neck was locked with the vise. Juhyun was losing it too fast. They let out a wail of anguish and hitched aggressively with their entire body. Their hands did not listen to them when they tried to unclasp the Giant’s arms. They jerked and writhed, legs hitting the muddy ground in despair. Blood rushed to their face, the pressure growing in the eyes and ears — their vision was dimming gradually and they heard a continuous noise somewhere inside their head.

Juhyun couldn’t end like this. They couldn’t allow this man stifle them. The raven scratched his forearms, dig their nails into his hard skin, but he never let them out. They needed air more than anything in this damned life.

With unknown power, as if something guided their hand, they took out the dagger and stuck it into the Giant’s thigh. He hissed, lurched, and compressed the neck in his fists tighter; bored his eyes into the reddened ones under him.

“You’ll regret being born, mutant shit,” he spat with such anger his saliva stung worse than venom. “I rarely touch old animals like you. Young flesh feels much better, but I’ll make an exception. For breaking my fun last time.”

The Giant took out the dagger and pressed it to the Velvet’s temple, lining it with a searing cut, his thick, red juice mixing with the latter’s.

“I’ll show you how slaves should behave with masters,” he snarled into their face and removed his hands from them, casting the weapon away.

Air, blood, cold fear and realisation rushed through the raven’s body, smashing them vigorously, making them stupefied, paralysed. 

Morphed.

“ _Sseulgi_...” they wheezed, and when Juhyun was rolled onto their front, they knew — this was going to be their destruction.

* * *

_Seulgi was deboning a fish which they had cooked together with Yeri when their breath was taken away from them. The raven choked, chopsticks falling from their fingers onto the table. They patted their chest, clasping at the fabric of their pants with the other hand till their knuckles turned white._

_“Unnie?” Yerim sent the Velvet a worried look._

_“Juhyun. Where is Juhyun?” They asked hoarsely, eyes growing bigger the same way terror spread in their soul._

_“I don’t know, unnie. Wha-”_

_“We need to find Juhyun,” Seulgi whispered and jumped to their feet._

_But as they made a step, their body strained rigid, and they fell back on their spine with a painful thump of their head against the floor; limbs stiff and trembling._

_“Unnie!” The girl yelled in shock and crawled to the elder briskly. She gathered them in her arms and tried to pull them up._

_“Where’s Juhyun?” They repeated in a shaking voice, their vision hazed by the deafening beating of their heart._

_“I don’t know!” Desperately cried out Yerim, petrified by a state her friend was in. “Maybe in their room!”_

_“I need to find Juhyun… Where’s my Juhyun?” The way they looked at their turtle made the latter squirm._

_Her eyes filled with tears as she said she didn’t know and watched Seulgi’s world shatter into pieces._

_“I need to find my Baechu…”_

_The raven got up and scarpered from the building, Yeri following them behind. They hastened to grab their weapon from the room, mumbling the only words to the self._

_“Unnie!” The younger called, then slid the door to Juhyun’s chamber open. It was empty. For some reason, her heart felt empty, too._

_“Search for Juhyun!” Seulgi shouted and bolted through the gates onto the street._

_Their Juhyun was in pain._

* * *

Juhyun was in agony. Seungwan could feel it as her own suffering. She was suffocating with tears, screaming on top of the lungs into that iron hand that had moved over her mouth only to watch her love losing their life under the yoke of the leering jumbo. 

Everything seemed to be a nightmare; she wanted it to be such, but the burning ache in her centre was telling the opposite. The blade to her neck was long forgotten as the only thing she sensed was knife-like fever through her being. 

Seungwan saw Juhyun’s face pressed into the mud as the Giant bent over them. Her veins shrivelled, plunging her into freezing, extreme fear when she realised what the man was about to do. 

She joggled again, savage and frantic in an attempt to free herself, but the sidekick was unswerving — he took the knife away for a second and instead forced the woman onto the ground, pinning her with his weight, pressing her head with his fist so that she could watch as the behemoth had ordered. Cries gurgled in her throat. The brunette thought she had already felt the whole suffering of the world when her parents had been killed, but she was so, so wrong. 

The man pulled Juhyun’s pants down in one rush of a hand, landed onto them with their mass. The raven flailed, hands grasping the frame at the back, trying to shove him away, but the latter effortlessly put those down, causing the Velvet to cry in shock. The Giant drew his prey’s shirt to himself, opening their shoulders, then pressed his filthy mouth to their skin, sucking and biting it until bruises started to appear. 

“You’re an untrained animal. I’ll screw you up, bitch,” he raged into their ear and pushed their legs open with his knees. “I’ll fucking tame you and use you like a whore you are.”

Juhyun gasped as their skull was pulled backwards by the hair. The jumbo snaked his brutal fingers to his groin, undoing his own pants, then spit onto his palm and moistened himself before thrusting violently into the person underneath.

Strength poured out of Seungwan’s body, from her crown to toes and into the ground. She was struck with a shedload of barbs that scraped her skin off. She felt dizzy, blazing with ache. Sharp pain travelled through her injured arm as the sidekick put his knee over it to stop her movements; knife under her jaw; a silent scream on her lips.

* * *

_Seulgi fell flat onto their face with their body strained exorbitantly yet again. They should find Juhyun. They would die without their mate. Juhyun was their oxygen. They would not live without them. They needed to find Baechu._

_The younger raven crawled forward until they were able to get up and run again. They didn’t know where they headed; where they were. They just knew they had to run. Run for their life; for Juhyun._

* * *

Scourging would be a blessing compared to that act Juhyun was pushed into. It was as if they were cut into small pieces, bit after bit, ache growing each second. The Giant seized their neck and made the raven bent back, ramming hard and fast. It seemed like a rough and harsh log was forced into them. The Velvet howled at their nails coming off as they ploughed the earth beneath them. They tried to wrestle again, but they were dying down, wilting, enervating. 

Suddenly, everything went blunt. Juhyun disappeared. Their body did not belong to them any more. The pain from intensive sandpapering didn’t exist to them either. They sensed neither broken arms nor bleeding fingers, calf, or heart. They felt nothing at all.

Time slowed down to the point one could perceive valves opening and closing with every heartbeat, letting the blood through.

Again the Velvet’s head was pressed to the ground, and Seungwan caught Juhyun’s eyes. Never before she had wished this much she couldn’t see. Those amethyst and pink she always lost herself in looked lifeless. Those were a stranger’s eyes; not those of an angel she had met many years ago. 

Her voice broke, but she failed to realise that; throat grinding her lungs, it almost made her gag.

The Giant was atrocious, slivering Juhyun as butchers carved up the flesh. He was grunting and groaning as he towered over the defunct figure, his movements vast and hawkish until he stilled and moaned his pleasure through gritted teeth.

Then he rolled to the side, panting, and wiped his forehead with a palm, pulled his pants back and stood up. He picked up his sword as well as the raven’s one and slid its end across their bottom. 

“Tight as a girl, huh! Fucking you velvet animals after the hunt is the best part,” the ogre spoke out. “You will remember this day, I promise. And now you know I keep my promises.”

With that, he swung his leg and kicked. Kicked. KICKED. 

Then he spat on the body, gestured to his men and walked away, followed by them. They took the bodies of their fellows and left. As if nothing had ever happened.

And the rain started again with a background thunder, pouring onto the two ruined globs.

Seungwan didn’t know what she should do. She was in such a terror, her limbs were not moving. Juhyun lay just several metres away from her, but it looked like they were on the other side of the universe.

She called them soundlessly and struggled to stand up. Oh, what she should do now? Her beloved sprawled over the ground, wheezing heavily as water and mud reached their mouth and nose, clogging them amok.

The girl felt like she was pushed by some force when she managed to scramble to the raven. She shuddered with every pound of her heart as she carefully rolled Juhyun onto their spine and cradled their head in her arms.

Raindrops started to wash the dirt from their face, and she gently wiped it with her hands, calling for the Velvet desperately, yet with no sound. Her tears mixed with those of the skies.

The elder looked dead, and their gaze was glassy and detached from the world. Seungwan wanted to cover them, heal and save them somehow, but she didn’t know how. She held Juhyun and keened for help, though her throat sensed like bleeding. 

There was not a soul in this goddamn place. Even Gods, if those existed, vanished from it, abandoned the couple, let all those terrible things happen.

But then she heard steps. Her head flung up and her eyes met with the yellowish, full of terror ones.

What Seulgi saw was unbearable, worse than anything they had seen before. Unwelcomed, salty drops began burning their skin.

“No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no...” They mumbled, realisation hitting them in the gut and causing them to lose breath. 

They beetled to Juhyun, hands gripping their own drenched mane as their mind struggled to process the situation. Apparently, their mate recognised them as the former wearily mouthed Seulgi’s name.

“Oh, please, no... Oh, no… Please, my love...” The younger raven squatted down and cupped Juhyun’s face, searching for answers in their dull eyes.

And as they found appalling acknowledgement, the taller Velvet started hyperventilating and kecking all the same as their own feelings merged with the ones of their friend. They discerned Seungwan croaking their name, but they couldn’t bear the sensations. It was the first time they felt so much pain; both Juhyun’s and their own. It was too much.

Seulgi spotted their leader gasping, and so did the brunette, a new wave of panic and dread all over her. Her mind refused to operate, to understand what was happening again.

The junior raven knew. They could feel Juhyun, and Juhyun could feel them. That’s how their bond worked. And right now they were hurting their companion even more. They should stop as soon as possible.

Stop feeling anything.

Seulgi looked at the elder’s frame — at their lingering female form. After the taller cautiously pulled their Baechu’s clothes to place and fastened them, they asked Seungwan to help and draped their pal’s spiritless body on their back. Picked up the latter’s dagger.

Seulgi would kill everyone. Everyone who touched Juhyun. _Everyone_. They’d tear them apart with their bare hands. Like a raging bear, they would demolish every single soul and feed on the wild fear they’d cause.

For Juhyun.

For the love of their life.


	10. Juhyun

Juhyun was a puppet; lifeless, broken, ugly puppet. They wanted to fall asleep and never wake up. They wished to rip their body apart and burn it down, to never return into it. Bae Juhyun dreamt to disappear. And never see those crying faces. Never hear those sobs and wails. Never feel those hearts break into pieces.

Once the raven was out from their fever, a doctor visited them and their arm was cast, wounds swathed. Seulgi tended them — fed, washed, brought out to fresh air and brushed Juhyun’s hair. Did everything to put them back onto their feet. 

Almost the same way Seulgi’s family had done many, many years ago.

Juhyun was five when their human mother died giving birth to their sibling, who lived for only six hours. 

When they turned ten they were left alone in this world. Being one of the Velvets, their father couldn’t bear the death of their beloved wife and a newborn — after all, depression and anxiety ate them.

Since those days, Juhyun’s life was only survival. To feed themselves, they started to rob. Were caught several times, beaten up, but eventually became better. They met other children of the streets and joined their little gang. Not for too long though, as the young raven was too different. And people did not like those who differed.

One day a woman spotted Juhyun stealing her belongings. She did not punish them, did not hand them to the guards, no. On the contrary, she nourished and cleaned them, and asked to work for her. 

Thus they began delivering things around the town. The raven did not know what that woman was or what they had to deliver, and they never inquired. They were simply happy they had a warm place to stay and hot food to eat. Besides, she was quite friendly toward them. Until one evening, that scarred the young Velvet for the rest of their life.

She presented them with a pretty boy’s dress and said Juhyun had to bring something very special to her close friends. The woman neatened them, tied their hair into the beautiful tail, cut their nails and even gave some sweets. The raven was the happiest person in the world.

When they arrived at that rich house, a man asked them to come in. He took a parcel from Juhyun’s hands and handed it over to his servant. Then inquired if Juhyun wanted something. They didn’t know what to say because never before during their work time the Velvet had been treated like this. But when another helper came, the host showed different kinds of desserts to the youngster. He said they could take everything they desired, however, to do so the raven had to meet his friends.

They never got those sweets. Instead, they were stripped down, gagged and raped by three vile men who favoured young boys.

When they were done, Juhyun was kicked out of that house; their new clothes were torn apart and covered with their blood and tears. They wandered around the streets for the entire night until early in the morning they stumbled upon the other Velvet child.

“Mom! Mom, look!” Seulgi pulled their mother by the hand and pointed their little finger at the haggard raven who hauled their legs in pain. They would remember forever how that beautiful woman gasped and clasped them in her soft arms, never letting them go.

Bae Juhyun was ten and Gang Seulgi was eight when the former was taken into the family. They took care of the new child, raised them and protected them. Recovered them from the horrors of rape and loss. And Seulgi became their close friend, their pillar and their love.

Being a swords person, Seulgi’s father taught both of their youngsters how to fight and protect themselves. Their mother gave all her motherly fondness, and in the end, Juhyun felt they were living again. They were finally happy. 

Nonetheless, they needed to avenge.

The young raven spent weeks searching for that woman they once had worked for. They gathered all the information possible about those filthy men. They prepared themselves the best they could, and one night they came for everyone. 

Juhyun was seventeen.

Their amethyst and pink eyes burned with rage and hatred when they cut throat after throat. The males screamed like pigs, gurgled with blood, tried to run, but the Velvet was ruthless. They killed everybody present in the house that midnight, be that a servant, a guest or a host.

And they cried their heart out to Seulgi after they returned home, covered in gore from head to toe. It was then the two Velvets decided to become mates. 

That day the full moon appeared closest to the Earth. Juhyun and Seulgi found a clearing in the forest, where they could see the skies with no intervention, and came there late at night, moonlight their only witness.

The elder put an empty bowl and a dagger onto the grass, spread a cover nearby and stilled.

“Seulgi-ah,” they called, watching their to-be-mate undressing.

“Yes?” The voice was soft and involving.

“Are you sure you want to do this with me?” Juhyun asked as they fiddled with their sleeve.

Seulgi stopped and looked at the other raven, whose face was lit by the silver light. They were so beautiful, so innocent, so loveable. Seulgi’s heart beat faster.

“I am, Juhyun-ah. Only with you.”

They came nearer and stroked their friend’s hair.

“And I don’t want to live without you,” they tenderly pecked the elder’s forehead, feeling them shiver. “I love you, Hyunnie.”

“I love you, too, Seulgi-ah...”

Juhyun kissed the younger’s palm and held it for a while against their lips. What they both were about to do was a rare ceremony of connecting their Velvet souls to each other. It would make them able to perceive each other’s feelings and emotions, find one another if separated and bond their lives together. If one died, the other would follow anon after. 

Once Juhyun and Seulgi were in a state of nature, they picked up the bowl and the dagger and stepped onto the cover, face to face. The elder held forward the vessel and placed it under their left hand that they opened for the taller Velvet to cut. With trembling hands, the latter slid the blade over the soft palm, and when the blood rippled down into the bowl and filled it a bit, the ravens exchanged the tools.

Juhyun’s heart was throbbing faster and faster as they cut through Seulgi’s flesh and their blood combined with the one in the bowl. The elder cast the dagger away, and the two of them took each other by the wrist with their left hands.

“Gang Seulgi,” Juhyun started, their voice low and hoarse but drenched with warmth and softness. “Blood to blood, heart to heart, soul to soul.”

They dipped their right thumb into the vessel in the younger’s hand and then pressed it to the spot between the latter’s brows.

“From now on I, Bae Juhyun, am your mate. From now on we are one. From now on your pain is my pain, your happiness is my happiness,” Juhyun sank their finger again and placed it tenderly to Seulgi’s lips. “From now on even death can not sunder us. You are me and I am you. Forever and ever.”

With that, the elder took the bowl into their right hand and waited for Seulgi to start their own speech.

The latter was hot; blood tickled their forehead, lips and wrist while their chest swelled with something unknown. It was getting harder to breathe, and it looked like Juhyun’s eyes glowed.

Seulgi plunged their thumb and brushed it above the elder’s nose bridge. 

“Bae Juhyun,” a lump in their throat hindered them and the younger had to swallow several times before they continued. “Blood to blood, heart to heart, soul to soul. From now on, you are my mate. And I, Gang Seulgi, am yours.”

The junior dipped their finger again and put it onto Juhyun’s mouth. 

“From now on your feelings are my feelings, your suffering is my suffering, your bliss is my bliss. From now on, I am always beside you. From now on I am your mainstay. From now on, even death can not sunder us. I am you and you are me. Forever and ever.”

Juhyun smiled at them just a bit, then rose the vessel and let Seulgi sip from it. After that, the younger reversed the action. As soon as the blood reached their insides, the ravens were hit by the flames of heat that spread all over their bodies to their connected arms and onto each other. 

It took their breaths away, their frames quivered, and for a second it seemed like they could read each other’s minds.

And then Juhyun’s lips were on the ones of Seulgi as they cupped the latter’s face and pressed their forms together. Suddenly, the couple was as if sticking to each other, unable to rend apart. Their skins melted, their sighs filled the surrounding air, and they felt odd and unique sensations expanding in their chests, drowning them.

“Baechu...” Seulgi puffed out as the elder’s tears smouldered their neck while they nuzzled it. 

As the bodies weakened, the newborn mates collapsed on the ground, holding tight to each other while their hearts came into the unison. From now on they would be always together. And when this life ended, they’d find each other in a different one again. Because this was what soulmates love meant — connecting spirits, souls, and centres in a bond that would never be broken. Even after flesh and bones decayed.

Time passed. The Velvets left their home, stepping on a new path, becoming soldiers of fortune. They met many people, made friends and foes, garnered experiences they never knew they’d need. The ravens learned humans, cognized sex with them and get to understand themselves better.

And Juhyun fell in love for the first time. It was not spiritual love as with their beloved and only Seulgi, but normal, ordinary one towards a human. 

Her name was Taeyeon. Juhyun turned nineteen when they met. She was a tad older and perceived them as a woman. Never before the raven felt so infatuated with love, never before they felt so good in the arms of a woman. Juhyun believed Taeyeon was sent to them from the skies, though did not understand how they deserved her. Those two years of being together were ones of the best in the Velvet’s life. Until the war began.

And Taeyeon disappeared. Despite the time Seulgi and Juhyun spent on her search, they never found her. They learned how to track people, acquired many new skills for their job, but it led to nothing. Since those times, Juhyun had never loved any human anymore. 

Being in the midst of war, the ravens stepped into its trap and got themselves involved, battling for no one in particular but their own lives. It was not even their war for people fought against people — the stupidest thing that happened on this planet. They could have lived in peace, helping and protecting each other, but instead chose to fight. Violent, greedy, unconscious human beings. Juhyun would never understand the reasoning behind people’s minds.

One day their path brought them to the town, where they saved two children; that was a new chapter in the Velvets’ story. They took the girls to the Aesam House and bought the child’s stay there. Among the ladies who helped the most to arrange things was fifteen years old Sooyoung — beautiful, caring, cute gal who unexpectedly snaked her way into the beds of both Velvets. She was their little joy throughout the year they stayed there and cared for their proteges. At one point in time, she would become Joy and rename the place into the House of Joy that’d be the most famous and prestigious establishment in the whole region.

As soon as the war ended, Seulgi and Juhyun left that town and continued their travel. Many things would happen to them, yet something would call them back to the house they gave their hearts to. In five years, they would return.

They would return and undergo new pain, new sufferings, new feelings and maybe new lives.


	11. Chapter 11

Juhyun didn’t talk to anyone. They just watched people doing something around them. Or to them. Silently. With the saddest eyes Seungwan had ever seen.

She brought some buckwheat tea to the raven and now was sitting beside them at the porch in front of Seulgi’s room. The elder was still sleeping there because their mate was afraid the former would harm themselves. Again. 

Juhyun was spotted cutting through their thigh with a knife. It was not a severe injury. Just a simple cut they believed would make them feel alive. But it didn’t. And besides, Seulgi got angry with them for what they had done.

Seungwan, on the contrary, became tenderer towards the elder. She did not talk much — her throat still hurt and her voice came out hoarse and weak. However, the girl managed to convey her feelings and intentions through the eyes and body language.

It was killing Juhyun. And reviving them all the same.

She poured the tea into the cups and held one out to the raven who didn’t pay any attention to it as they spaced out staring at the ground. How could she be so warm to them? Wasn’t she disgusted? Shouldn’t she be turned off by them? Because they were. 

“Juhyun-ssi,” Seungwan gently brushed her palm against their forearm, returning them to reality. 

It was a hot, late spring evening, the sun was already set but the skies still showed some colours. As the Velvet angled their head to the woman, she reached the cup out to them again. How soft her gaze was! How her every feature emanated warm concern! She was the moon on earth, and the raven wished she could gather them in her arms and move them to their beloved sky.

Juhyun was doing better. It’s been more than a week since the incident, and they were slowly returning to their senses. Yet, their heart was empty. Their soul felt hollow. As if they had a dehiscent hole in their chest. It had to be filled with something.

Something like love. Seulgi, Yerimie, Sooyoungie — they were giving everything they could, but Juhyun needed more. The other type of love. Seungwan’s love, that encapsulated and heated them up as the raven felt cold. Extremely cold.

The Velvet shivered and wearily took the steaming cup. Pleasant warmness sat in their bandaged hand, and it smelled very good. Since they were not eating often lately, their senses cleansed and became even more perceptive. Every scent, every flavour was much more intense whenever they decided to try something.

Seungwan studied them for a while. Then picked a blanket from behind them and put it over their shoulders, tugging it tightly at the front. She was so close Juhyun could taste her fragrance on their tongue. Blue oranges on the snow. So unique, so _her_.

The raven inhaled deeply as the woman gathered their hair and put it under the cloth at their back. Exhaled slowly when she distanced and took her own cup. Juhyun wanted to enjoy the caress of her soft and warm hands over and over again. But at once, the Velvet thought they fouled her every time she touched them.

It hurt. They closed their eyes and sensed tears building up. They hadn’t cried during the rape. Nor did they after. And they should not now.

A stifled mix of sigh and moan escaped the elder’s lips under their feelings getting out of control. Seungwan turned to face them when Juhyun tried to suppress their overflowing pain by taking a sip of tea. Having noticed their shaking hands, she felt her heart ripping apart. Some people needed to ripen before letting their emotions out, and right now Juhyun was ready to do so. They just had to stop fighting them back.

Seungwan set her cup away, took the other from the raven to put it aside as well, and cradled her partner in her arms. It was necessary to cry the pain away. The tears would cleanse the wound so that it would start healing. Juhyun should start healing.

They felt comforting hands around them. Sensed her quickened heartbeat as she pressed them close to her bosom. And when she placed her lips onto their crown, they finally let it out.

Juhyun could weep an ocean as their pain streamed with no end. Tears burned their eyes and cheeks, running down their face to only be soaked by the woman’s shirt. The Velvet ululated so hard it was physically hurting Seungwan. She herself had cried so much before the girl was not sure she could do that again. But apparently, she could — a sigh of sorrow left her lungs and brought waters to her browns.

Seungwan’s grip tightened as the raven quivered under the sobs. They felt so miserable, so small, so unwanted. They were a waste of this world, an otiose lump of meat wandering through life with no purpose. Juhyun was not worthy of this woman: pure, sweet, suffocating; addictive, desirable, inebriating. 

And they were one of those Velvets — mutants whom everyone hated and despised. And for a reason. There was nothing good in being of such a creature because they were repellent to everybody. Since the very childhood, the raven felt being untoward to existence. Even those whom they loved turned their backs to them. So unfair.

They grasped the girl’s clothes till their fingertips hurt, slumping further into her frame as their deep wails never stopped. Right now they pitied themselves. Right now they angered they had been born at all. Why would anybody choose to be delivered into a world that made people suffer? Couldn’t they all just stay there above the blues, among the stars where everything enjoyed its existence?

Juhyun fell limp in Seungwan’s arms. They were gasping jaggedly as they lacked strength; tears gliding inaudibly. The woman’s loving fingers combed through the raven’s hair as she was trying to calm both of them down. If only she could scoop up all the pain from them! For that, she would give up as much of her life as needed.

Seungwan felt guilty. If she hadn’t asked Juhyun to go out that day those horrors would have never happened. In addition, that monster had noted that because of her it had been easier to vanquish the raven. Right. She saw how they fought. Juhyun would have defended themselves if she hadn’t been there. 

Now they were vulnerable and needed attention and care. But would they like Seungwan to be around them later? What would she do if they rejected her in the end? 

The brunette noticed them getting quieter as the elder was drifting into the sleep. Sometimes she wished she could be as close to Juhyun as Seulgi. 

They had talked to each other the other night, and she had asked them about things she wanted to know. Not as much as she hoped for, but still that conversation brought her a tad closer to the Velvets; gave an insight into their souls.

Flashback start

_Seulgi wiped their tears as they slid the door to their room and sat near Seungwan at the porch. The raven was so exhausted, so overwhelmed by the shakes of emotions and feelings within them, it was getting harder to keep strong. They just had changed the bandages on Juhyun’s hands — new nails were not growing yet, and the elder’s right arm seemed to be too damaged to heal quickly._

_Once relatively comfortable against the wall, Seulgi sighed and wiped their cheeks again. They had been a mess lately: they had cried on Sooyoung’s lap; sobbed in Yerimie’s arms. And now they were tearing up in Seungwan’s presence. As if those people were not full of pain enough._

_“I’m sorry, Wan-ah,” the Velvet whispered and hid their face in the palms. “I’m a terrible friend...”_

_“You’re the best,” rasped out the woman and put her hand on the raven’s knee, patted it for a while. “I wish I could be at least a tiny bit as good as you.”_

_The raven sniffed to stop their nose from running, rubbed tears from their palm and covered the girl’s hand with it._

_“You’re better than me. It’s too much for me and I make people around feel worse.”_

_The older tilted their neck and put their head on the woman’s shoulder._

_“Instead of doing my best, I make everyone cry.”_

_“Sometimes, we need to cry, Seulgi-ah,” almost inaudibly replied Seungwan and watched the streetlight flicker._

_It was a late night. Juhyun should have fallen asleep by now, though the girl felt they would stay awake until Seulgi joined them. Nightmares tortured their poor soul._

_The duo on the porch spent some time in silence. The Velvet had already stopped crying and currently was snuffling from time to time. Their hand remained still on top of the girl’s one, soft and warm and tight. They did not want Seungwan to go yet, and it made the latter think about things she desperately wanted to learn._

_“Seulgi-ah,” the girl started with a broken voice, then swallowed to clean up her throat. “How... did you find them?”_

_“What do you mean?” Asked the elder, a bit confused._

_“How did you identify where Juhyun was that day?”_

_“Oh...” the Velvet patted Seungwan’s hand. “I don’t know. I just knew I had to get to them. My legs brought me there.”_

_“But… did you know what was happening?”_

_“No,” Seulgi sighed sadly. “I sensed fear and pain, and that’s all.”_

_“I’m so sorry,” the girl squeezed the raven’s knee and fell into her mind’s pit._

_“That’s what mating brings — you experience every extreme emotion and feeling your partner does.”_

_“Is it only for… the Velvets?” Seungwan felt awkward naming them like this, but she didn’t know any other way of addressing them yet._

_“Yes. Only my kind can mate. I think it’s because of our mutation. Something is in our blood.”_

_Seulgi pulled their head away from the girl and rested it against the wall instead, eyes closed. Their thoughts flew back to the night of the ceremony._

_“Juhyun was so beautiful when we did that. They are always beautiful, but that midnight they were breathtaking. Their eyes glowed, Seungwan-ah. Can you imagine? It was so mesmerizing!”_

_A warm little smile graced the woman’s face as she tried to draw the picture in her mind._

_“Could you tell more?”_

_“Oh… No, sorry. That is somewhat mystic knowledge. We learned that from an old monk in our city and spent so much time trying to prove we were worthy. And we swore to protect it,” Seulgi reflected for a moment, recollecting things in their head. “All I can say is I’ll never forget that. It was like feeling tremendous love scorching your lungs plus having the best orgasm of your entire life, yet without any sex.”_

_“You’ve… never?” Seungwan cast a look at the vis-à-vis. “I saw you kissing… I thought...”_

_A soft, quiet laugh escaped the raven’s lips. They patted the girl’s hand again, but this time more intensely._

_“That’s not even kissing, Seungwan-ah. Just a nibble. We don’t have sexual attraction towards each other. Our kisses are more like… Well, like a really good hug, but with deeper meaning. Heh!”_

_The Velvet laughed anew at how ridiculous their explanation sounded. However, they could not explain better. It indeed meant what it meant._

_“I know it sounds strange as, usually, you don’t do that to your friends, even best ones. It’s your lovers whom you kiss, but Juhyun had started it that night and we sometimes do it ever since.”_

_“Oh...”_

_“Actually… I can’t remember the last time we kissed. But if you say you’ve seen us, then it was… five years ago? He-he-he,” the Velvet giggled again. “So you assumed we were lovers?”_

_Seungwan’s cheeks blushed a little._

_“At first. But as… you both… slept with Joy… I thought this is not what usually couples do… Yet, I was not sure. Besides, you urged me to confess to Juhyun-ssi...”_

_“Ah, Seungwan-ah,” Seulgi shifted to embrace the girl in their typical bear-ish way. “We’re not lovers. At least not physically. And couples sometimes do sleep with third parties. Just for you to know. He-he.”_

_The raven breathed in the noise of air, waiting for the lines of thinking rearrange in their brain._

_“Anyway, we’re yet different. We don’t get jealous of each other or people. Jealousy kills the elegance of love. Or at least the beauty of intimacy, if it’s simply sex._

_“People tend to become possessive over everything they like. We manage not to because nothing in this life truly belongs to us. Even our bodies are given for a time,” the raven caressed Seungwan’s shoulder thoughtfully. “This is how my kind sees the world, at least. Yes, we can sometimes be irritated if the target of our concern does not pay attention to us. I mean… Joy always does this — she courts Juhyun in front of me and teases me. But I was never jealous. Provoked, maybe, but not possessive.”_

_“But if you feel irritated by this, doesn’t it suggest you already demand more of that person?”_

_“I think it’s different. I know I can be demanding and even greedy when it comes to things that I like, but jealousy means you want those things only to yourself. And in its turn, it leads to slavery. If one possesses, the other is in possession. When someone is the master, the other is a slave…”_

_Seulgi hummed to themselves and stared at the flies that gathered around the streetlight nearby. Those insects were slaves as they were possessed by the warmth and brightness of the light. However, they were blessed because they had no idea about any of those notions. They had no conscience, no deep feelings. Those flies simply needed something, and once they got it, they were — without realisation — happy. And exactly because of that, they were happy._

_“It’ll be difficult for people to understand your reasoning, Seulgi-ah. Even more difficult to live by that,” Seungwan mused as she deliberated over the expressed idea._

_“That’s why it is still uncommon for us to engage with humans. We accept polyamory in many forms, but the majority of people don’t. I’m not saying we are all practising polyamorous relations. My mom is an ordinary woman while my ‘father’ is of my kind and they have no one except for her.”_

_For a while, the raven listened to the sounds of the neighbourhood. The topic of relationships was complicated. Especially if that relationship was between the Velvets and humans. Seulgi hadn’t spoken about those with anyone yet._

_“If I fall in love with a human one day, I’ll be devoted to them. I want to be. I won’t get intimate with anybody except them unless we both agree on the opposite. But they will have to understand that I am inseparable from my mate and I love them with all my soul. My human love will have to accept the thought of sharing me with someone else, even though I’m not involved in a sexual relation with Juhyun.”_

_The Velvet chuckled._

_“My human love… Sounds weird, huh?” They asked._

_“A bit,” Seungwan agreed and tittered as well. “But it makes sense.”_

_“As to Hyun… And I know you are interested,” Seulgi smiled and pressed the girl closer to themselves. “They are complicated. But treasure.”_

_“I know...” The girl whispered, and her pulse increased its pace. “I’ve told them. About my feelings.”_

_Seulgi suddenly started and was all eyes on Seungwan._

_“Wait, really? When?”_

_“That very day...” Her voice came scarcely above her breath._

_“Oh, Seungwanie,” the elder cuddled the woman in an iron grip. They wanted to say something, but no words formed in their mind._

_“I realise it’s wrong, but Juhyun barely looks at me… As if I can kill them… As if looking at me will cause them pain...”_

_“Did you… get intimate?”_

_“...Ne...”_

_So it must have been she with whom Juhyun morphed in delay…_

_The Velvet pondered over the answer. They knew the reason for their mate’s behaviour. A sound sigh left their body._

_“Hyun was… ruined… before the eyes of a person who likes them… And since you perceive them as a male… But saw as a female… Oh, Seungwan-ah,” Seulgi stroked the brunette’s hair gently. “We… do not relate to any gender or sex, but our morphing is a very sensitive subject.”_

_“But I am not bothered by their gender or-”_

_“Yet they served as a male partner for you, right?”_

_“...Ye, but-”_

_“That’s enough. They know how you see them, and that’s enough.”_

_Seungwan was extremely close to breaking into tears again. She didn’t realise Juhyun could feel even worse because she had witnessed them in a different physique._

_“When people see us, they instantly get an idea about us. We are androgynous, meaning we are both feminine and masculine, but it’s people’s perception that defines us as a male or a female to them. For you I am a man, for Yerimie I am a woman, but in reality, I am none. I just possess both characteristics, so to say.”_

_“But I can’t do anything about it, Seulgi-ah...” Her pleading eyes looked at the raven as if asking for forgiveness._

_“And you shouldn’t because it’s not the point here. We feel how you perceive us; we even do not have to talk to you to understand that. And we can do nothing about it,” the Velvet brushed a tear from the girl’s chin. “But it’s only a perception. I haven’t mentioned morphing yet._

_“And this is where it gets more complicated. We don’t control it either. It just occurs when people want to get intimate with us. Look, I touch you and you touch me,” — the elder pressed the younger’s palm to their cheek as they did the same towards her — “and nothing happens. I’m not morphing because you have no sexual desire for me.”_

_“I know, Juhyun told me this...”_

_“Ne… Morphing is something very intimate. It’s the exaltation of our bodies when we obtain sex. And imagine someone destroying the purity of this,” Seulgi shuddered at the thought that crossed their mind. “When you are forced into the body you don’t want to have now. When the person who likes you sees you in another, different form._

_“Don’t be aggrieved at Juhyun, please. They would need time to renew their image in your eyes.”_

_“I’m not… I’m afraid, Seulgi-ah; scared to harm them even more,” Seungwan smeared the tears across her face. Juhyun had nothing to restore for her — they were as divine as before. She just wanted to love them and not make them pained. “It’s all my fault...”_

_“It’s that bastard’s fault, Wannie… Not yours-”_

_“I asked them to spend a day with me… And failed to defend myself… to run away from that man...”_

_“Stop,” Seulgi’s voice was stern and demanding — something that reminded the brunette of her lover. “Juhyun needs you. If you keep playing prey, they wouldn’t recover, and you understand that. They need you, Seungwan. Quit blaming yourself.”_

_“I don’t know what to do...”_

_“No one knows,” the raven returned their head on the woman’s shoulder. “Do what feels right. Whatever it is...”_

_The woman sighed harmoniously with her companion and they both spent some time in their respective headspaces._

_“Has any human ever perceived you as you are?” Seungwan asked after a while._

_“I’ve never experienced it. And even if there were cases I’ve never heard of any. Though, I’d love this to happen. Really. Yet we would need to learn how to morph consciously. Otherwise, our population would go extinct.”_

_“Can’t morph around...”_

_“Yes... We require people for childbirth, but even then it is very difficult for our species. Human women are stable and it’s easier for them. But if I, for example, got pregnant, I’m not sure I’d carry the child safely. Besides, the process of giving birth is twice as painful as for ordinary females, making it extremely lethal.”_

_“I didn’t know that...” It was heartbreaking._

_“To make things worse, often, our children are born into the world dead. I’ve no idea why. It’s a 50 percent chance that my baby would be of my kind. But only around 40 percent they would see the light.”_

_“How… terrible,” the woman’s voice was strained as ache rose in her chest._

_The elder kept mum for a tad of a time. They wanted to say so much as their mind flooded with thoughts, yet they had to arrange those first._

_“Yeah...” Seulgi slid along the wall and was half-lying on the porch and the woman’s side now. It was getting cooler as the shadows of the night fought the recent warmth of the sun. The raven yawned quietly, stuck their tongue out and bit it lightly. “Sometimes I ponder over the reason for us to exist at all.”_

_“What… do you mean?”_

_“Think of it — we were people once. The same as you, like everybody. But then mutation changed something and now we are different. But for what? Why? We even don’t know whether this was a natural mutation. Why does Nature need us? We are not males neither females, our original bodies are the ugliest things this planet bears, we can’t reproduce without losing most of our offsprings. That fact that we are attractive for both sexes or that we have no illnesses or many other so-called ‘improvements’ does not help us in this world at all. Some people place us on a pedestal saying we are the masterpieces of creation, the top evolution of human beings because of our benefits and blah-blah-blah… But the majority consider us as trash. You know we had been slaves many, many years ago, right? So lots still believe we should be ones, used for sexual pleasures and so on. I don’t want to be a slave, Wannie… Or a sex toy._

_“With all our ‘better blood’ we can’t coexist normally with people. Although we are more or less respected nowadays, many yet feel threatened, because they say we are ‘better humans’. Yes, if we wanted, we would have conquered humankind. I mean, we are perfect soldiers. Universal, strong, and all of that bullshit...”_

_Seulgi groaned in a tiny voice as they shifted on the wooden floor, trying to position themselves more comfortable._

_“But we simply want to live peacefully with everyone. We don’t need this label of being ‘better’, because we are not. We are much more broken than anyone. Maybe we are here as a result of a blunder, I’ve no clue, but I wish us to be more stable, to morph by will and give life to living babies. And hopefully, one day people will learn how to treat us without prejudice.”_

_“...I’m afraid we won’t see that, Seulgi-ah...” Seungwan breathed out with chagrin. It would take several generations to achieve that, and both the raven and the girl understood that._

_“Yeah… Sorry, I talk too much tonight. I am just happy I can discuss it with someone… And it drives my mind away from… Juhyun’s state.”_

_“No… I’m glad we talked. I now understand you a bit better, both of you… Thank you, Seulgi-ah,” the brunette said. “For everything.”_

_“Thank you, too, Wannie,” the taller mumbled and yawned again. “I’m so tired these days. I even fell asleep while talking to Yerimie yesterday…”_

_The woman let out a snigger._

_“Seriously… She said I was speaking and then… ta-dam! I’m in the land of Nod,” clear amazement oozed from the raven._

_“You should rest more. Let_ me _look after Ju-hYUn,” Seungwan requested, but her voice cracked in a very unpleasant way._

_“Heal your throat, Wan. You’re doing enough for them already.”_

_“I can do better.”_

_“Do better for your throat. And arm,” Seulgi stated and rubbed their eyes — hey were puffy because of crying and tickled due to tiredness. “I’ll go cuddle Juhyun now.”_

_“Ne,” Seungwan got up along with the raven. “Good night. Hug Juhyun for me, please.”_

_“I will, Wan-Wan. Good night.”_

Flashback end

A pack of wolves was hunting them. They were so afraid it seemed like their limbs refused to move. Juhyun was running so fast yet somehow stayed at the same spot, just watching the animals come closer to them with every blink of their eyes. They wanted to cry, but their throat got seized by something they couldn’t see. How did they appear here? Why were they hunted? A sudden wave of dread hit Juhyun, and it physically washed them from the place they tried to escape. They did not want to die. It was not their time yet.

The waves transformed into the real waters, and the raven sensed being dragged deeper into the dark, cold bosom. As their ears clogged, the Velvet jerked with all the strength they had in an attempt to grasp some air. But the more they swam, the further away the light appeared. Their lungs shrank, and bitter water filled their mouth and nose. Hearing distant howls and the noise of a whirlpool in their head, they twitched again. Could someone please save them? They were not ready. 

Suddenly, their chest burned and Juhyun started tearing their clothes apart, revealing their heart protruding through the flesh. The organ glowed with bluish hues and beat extremely slowly, yet the force that pulled it from their torso was gigantic. When their heart detached from their body, it floated away, and the water instantly replaced the empty inner space, drowning them even faster. Were they already dead? No one could live without a core, but still, they managed to think — their mind was working somehow.

Right after that thought crossed their head, the Velvet felt soft hands on their face. They saw nobody, but the touch was so real, so warm, _so_ familiar. Juhyun exhaled the last portion of air they had and closed their eyes. If they were already dead, at least they still could feel those palms and disappear into them. If they were about to die, the raven was not afraid anymore. 

She could take them. 

All of them.


	12. Chapter 12

Juhyun saw her in their dreams every night. Taking one or another form, she was there every time they closed eyes and fell into oblivion. She spent many hours with them during the days, yet it seemed to be not enough for the raven. They longed for more of her.

Seungwan got her voice back, and she carefully practised singing again. Right there she sat with Yerimie in the backyard discussing the changes to the newly composed song. The youngest girl plucked the strings of her pipa, making some notes on the sheet of paper from time to time. 

Juhyun watched them from a distance as they and Seulgi rested under the tree and drew something. Well, the elder was more gazing around than doing anything while their mate was immersed into the process. 

“She is beautiful, right?”

“Ne~” Juhyun mused, eyes glued to the chirping woman. But then the words of their friend registered in their mind. “Wha-what?”

Seulgi hid a smile and bowed lower, as if something in their drawing needed to be fixed. The older raven studied them, waiting for a reply. They felt their cheeks blushing a little.

“The song… is beautiful?” The younger Velvet asked and flashed a grin to the elder.

“Ah...” Such a relief! “Yes, very beautiful, yes...”

Juhyun pouted and returned their attention to their piece of paper. It didn’t matter how much they tried to draw something with their left hand, their mind was constantly running away from them to the girl on the other side of the yard.

Why were they so enraptured with her? Was it because she had confessed her feelings to them? Well, it had started even before, but when exactly? Juhyun did not remember. 

They thought the need for her would disappear once they tasted her, but it never happened. Everything they presumed in relation to that woman was wrong. Everything they expected about their own feelings towards her was wrong.

Juhyun wanted to learn her. And it appeared not only their sexual desire spoke within them. They wanted to know more of her, of her life, of her mind, emotions. They needed to understand her better, to sense her deeper, so to say.

But they couldn’t. Not after what they had been through. Not after what she had seen. Even though Seungwan was around them, cared for them, hugged and caressed them, the raven couldn’t shake off the idea that they tainted her whenever she was near. 

She shouldn’t have witnessed any of those awful things. Shouldn’t have experienced such fear. Juhyun had promised to protect her, but in the end, they became the reason for her pain. She cried too much because of them. This was not how the raven wanted to treat their little moon.

Juhyun sighed, put the brush away and stared at Seungwan. A soft smile of hers was aimed on her sister, and it made the raven’s heart warmer. Why did she affect them so much by doing nothing? Why did she make them think of her day and night?

Were they falling for her? Impossible. No. The Velvet shook their head, drew their legs closer to their chest and hugged them, propping their cheek onto the knees. It was not like it had been with Tae…  _ her _ . Back then, Juhyun had felt invincible. Now they felt threatened every time Seungwan’s name crossed their mind. It couldn’t be love or any other similar feeling, could it?

“I think about leaving this place after we finish… things here,” the elder spoke quietly and observed Yerimie poking a finger into her sister’s side.

Seulgi hummed something, but then tilted their neck to look at Juhyun.

“I hoped to stay here longer,” they said simply.

“I know, Seulgi-ah… It’s just… I’m not... I… ugh...”

The older raven snorted and frowned. This was exactly the reason they needed to go somewhere else — their mind didn’t belong to them any more. They moved their gaze to the mate.

“So where do you want to go?” Seulgi’s soft eyes flickered across Juhyun’s face.

“I… don’t know. Someplace.”

“Okay...” The junior Velvet raised their hand to play with the bell on their earlobe. It jingled a soothing tune before they spoke again. “Would you like to return and settle here after that?”

“Settle?” Juhyun’s brows jumped in surprise. They had never discussed the possibility of settling down.

“Yes. Why not? Here we have our own family. We can buy a house or two, find other ways to earn money. I like it here, Baechu-ah.”

Seulgi’s lips stretched in a delicate smile as they watched their friend genuinely considering their words.

“Think about it, love. I’d like to visit our parents if we go, but then let’s come back and start a new life here.”

“New life, eung?” With a heavy sigh, Juhyun turned to see the girls chatting afar. “I don’t believe I can manage that, Seulgi-ah. Not any more...”

They always thought they were strong. Their life was full of trials from almost the very beginning, and Juhyun had to start anew over and over again. It was exhausting, and they were tired. Tired to the point they did not want to live that much anymore. They were strong indeed, but even the most sturdy rocks would break once hit hard enough. Juhyun felt it was the last blow they had taken. They did not want to start something new. They should just exist from now on until they or Seulgi would die and either of them would follow right after. If Juhyun could, probably, they’d have let themselves bite the dust by now. Yet, they had Seulgi bonded to them.

The younger Velvet caught the eye of their mate when those turned to see them. And it was not the will to start a new life that was smouldering there.

They crawled closer to Juhyun and pulled them into the tightest hug they had ever mustered.

“I promise you we’ll cut that son of a bitch into pieces and feed them to him,” Seulgi whispered as tears pressured their lids. “I’m close to finding his habitat.”

“I’m not sure I can endure seeing him again...”

“You can. And you will make him regret taking his first breath.”

Juhyun shivered as their mind replayed the situation. Feeling the pause, the taller Velvet distanced just a little to cradle their mate’s head in their hands.

“I’m so sorry, Hyunnie,” the junior breathed out and held their partner closer to themselves, teardrops splashing out rapidly. “So, so…s-sorry...”

“Why can’t… I live happily, Seulgi-ah?” Juhyun hid their face in Seulgi’s hair, their hand desperately clutching onto the latter’s clothes. “Am I a nonperson?”

“No, love, no,” the younger cooed against the choking tears as they heard their only one gasping. They pressed them even closer, heart to heart, body to body. They wished to tell Juhyun they were the most beautiful soul in this forsaken world, the most adorable and lovable bunny for them. Seulgi wanted to impart all their feelings towards the mate, but they did not know how. 

The elder raven sensed a powerful grip around them tightening, a hand on the back of their head stroking softly. Their heart hurt. For both of them.

Seulgi. The beam of light in their black, impenetrable life. The only person who would love them no matter what. The only creature Juhyun could love no matter what. And they would always be together. 

Unlike humans, their mate would be there for them forever. People harmed, used them for whatever reasons, or simply made them feel miserable. Shouldn’t they stop being a victim in this relationship with humans? Shouldn’t they behave in a different way now? In the way that would command fear and greater respect. 

They had been turning their cheeks for too long. It was time for a change, wasn’t it?

And so Juhyun would focus on their recovery to take vengeance on those monsters. They had been wrecked before. And even though the raven did not want to live much, they were still going to do so. One couldn’t break things that had already been broken. Juhyun was strong, and they regretted that. But if this life was not welcoming them, they should not tolerate the world as well.

They had been too soft. It was time to end this.

“Promise me, Gang Seulgi. Promise,” Juhyun began as bile started rising inside them. They should stop feeling pity towards themselves. They were not some sacrifice. 

“I promise,” the younger said and sensed weak fingers at the side of their head.

Juhyun pushed them away to look deeply into their eyes.

“Promise me you’ll slaughter them for me if I weaken,” the elder’s pools were so dark and sharp that Seulgi felt a worm of fear quartered in their heart. 

“I promise you, Bae Juhyun, my love,” they nodded. If that erased the pain from their partner, they would debone everyone, scalp and resurrect them to kill again. “I’d do that with my bare hands if needed.”

A heavy, lonely tear slid down the shorter Velvet’s cheek, and then they pressed their lips to the ones of their mate. The whole calamity of their inner world was manifested with the kiss. Brusque, hurtful, but it opened the door to Juhyun’s feelings as Seulgi was forced through the whole gale of them inside their chest.

_ “I’m sorry and I love you,” _ thought the junior.

_ “I love you, too, Gang Seulgi.” _

***

“I’ll pay as much as you want, Joy, just bring me two of your girls.”

Juhyun fixed their expectant gaze on the young woman standing near their door. The Velvet’s depression and unwillingness to live was changing to bursts of rage and excessive need for sex. As if having girls swing on their dick would wash the scent of those bastards away. 

“Why?” Sooyoung inquired, taken aback by such a request. That was not what she had expected to hear at all.

For the last several weeks, everyone except Seulgi just tiptoed around the elder raven and cried their eyes out. Juhyun moved back to their room as they got much better, but at the same time, they became harsh and cold and demanding.

“Because I tell you so,” the raven’s gruff voice came out with aggravation as they patted their fixed arm with the fingers.

Juhyun was in a muck. So much they needed to dig themselves deeper into the other kind of dirt — to overwhelm themselves with other bodies in favour to forget the horrors. Their wrath was rising every day the same as their inner stem was unbending from the oppression. Juhyun craved flesh and blood. While Seulgi was scouting for the Giant and his men, the elder raven had to prepare themselves for the carnage they planned. Physically and mentally. Their sword was taken hostage, their arm was broken, and even though the Velvet’s bones healed better than everyone else’s, it dissatisfied them further. They became curt. 

“You know how it works here, Juhyun-ssi. I am not selling my girls,” Sooyoung’s voice was stern, her eyes — obdurate. 

“I know they want me, I’ve seen the way they look at me. It’s not selling, I simply suggest a quicker way out so that each side will be content. I give them all they want, they give me my pleasure.”

“You can have me if you desire to fuck someone this much. I will do everything you want. As always,” she said, trying her best to hide confusion behind the stretched confidence.

Of course, Joy could have been the first one to whom Juhyun would come if they needed to unload themselves. However, this was different. They wanted someone they were not acquainted with, somebody whose face they would forget or better even not see. Or someone at least distant. Sooyoung was too precious. Although, not undesirable at all.

“I don’t want you. I wish for two of your girls instead,” Juhyun came closer to the woman. “I won’t hurt them.”

“You’ve already done enough,” she hissed angrily, casting daggers with her eyes. 

“What do you mean by that?” The elder asked with a slight squint.

“By that I mean Seungwan-unnie. Have you seen her? She is like a ghost, not eating well, wanders through the nights… You’ve been rude to her. I’ve never thought you could be so… abominable!” 

Sooyoung didn’t know she was that hot under the collar until she let it off. Her body straightened even more as she neared Juhyun’s face in the bold provocation. But their expression never altered.

“I’m sorry to hear that, but it has nothing to do with my request, Bak Sooyoung.”

What was wrong with them? What had happened that they changed this much? Joy felt extremely fraught.

“Juhyun-ssi,” the woman sighed. She had to calm down. “I don’t know what you’ve been through and if you prefer not to tell, I understand and accept that. But please, do not be like this. You know we all are worried about you.”

“This is not about my request either,” Juhyun spoke with a deadly tone. “Send me your girls.”

“Have me! Want now? Take me now. Want later? Fine, any time,” she replied, irritated.

“I’ve told you I don’t want you.”

“You always say that and end up fucking me, anyway.”

“This time it’s different.”

“I am better than two of them.”

“This is not a competition, Bak Sooyoung,” the elder puffed through their nose, making their nostrils move with the gush of air.

“What is it then?”

She was too intrusive and stubborn all the same. Yet the Velvet was adamant.

“Just send me your girls. Once,” they should change their tactics — it was Sooyoung to whom they spoke after all. Juhyun placed their palm at the side of the woman’s neck, squeezed it gently. “Don’t oppose, my little chick. Let me do what I want and I promise I’ll get you to the edge of the universe.”

“I’m not s-”

“Seulgi and I will fuck you together,” they cut her off and slid their hand to the back of the girl’s head, gripped a fistful of her soft tresses and leaned in closer to her face. “We’ll be as rough as you’ll want us to be,  _ Joy. _ ”

Holy. 

Fucking. 

Shit. 

Their words hit her so hard she felt herself getting wet right away.  _ Instantly _ . Like some slut.

As her browns grew bigger and her breath wavered for a moment, the corner of Juhyun’s mouth rose a bit while their eyes hypnotised the girl with their bestial flickers. Press more and she would succumb.

“Come on, we’ll let you do everything, Joy. Just imagine,” they hovered over her ear, “two of us in your perfect juicy slit...”

“You’re... bluffing, Juhyun-ssi,” with certain difficulties whispered the woman, attacked by the pictures her brain drew. She was too close to accepting their swap, especially as they tugged her hair even more.

“I’ve never deceived you, Sooyoungie,” the elder raven blazed her ear with their breath again and moved back, eyes scanning the girl over. Did they win?

“You better never do, Juhyun-ssi,” Joy brushed off their hand and made an extra step backward to ease her excitement. “Search somewhere else. I…will not give you my girls.”

“I can see right through you, Bak Sooyoung. Don’t deprive yourself of such an opportunity.”

“I said no. Yet don’t you dare approach anyone here without my consent, Juhyun-ssi,” the girl crossed her arms at her chest. She knew they could do that. “That’s my last word to you. And by  _ anyone, _ I also mean unnie. Go find yourself some whore to f-” 

“That is none of your business,” for some reason Juhyun sounded threatening. Their voice had never been this cold before.

“Oh no, that’s exactly my business!” Joy snapped aggressively. “She  _ is _ one of my girls!”

The elder chuckled, but the woman was losing herself.

“Stop toying with her! Everyone here knows she deifies you! And you used it to  _ fuck _ her!”

“This is not your FUCKING business, Sooyoung!” Juhyun roared as they sprung to the girl, eyes glistening with ire. Joy did not understand anything! She had no right to act like this towards them! 

“She slept on the floor outside your door for several nights! She fucking cared for you! And you fobbed her off like some mongrel,” the younger felt her veins swell at her neck. “She-”

“I DIDN’T ASK FOR ANY OF THAT!” 

Juhyun’s breath was heavy as their heart was destroying their chest, beating hard, while Sooyoung was unshakable; her features sharpened, for she was alight with aggravation.

“I want to slap you so much right now,” the woman gritted in a low voice. She was truly stunned by the elder’s behaviour.

“Well, I’m standing right here!” Juhyun motioned to their figure with their hand as if they actually wanted to be hit.

“Stop it! Please.”

The ravens swished their heads to the mellow sound, both brains registering the unexpected person who came into the sight. How much had she heard?

“I even haven’t started yet,” Joy flashed a riled glance at Juhyun.

“Then don’t start.”

Seungwan had just returned from the market when she heard the duo arguing. As she approached closer, the girl understood she was the point of the quarrel. Juhyun’s words revoiced painfully within her but not because of their direct meaning.

“Unnie-”

“Could you leave us, please, Sooyoungie? I can take it from here,” she approached the building as she spoke.

“Are you sure, unnie? You don’t deserve such an attitude,” Joy frowned as she looked at Juhyun, who set their jaw under extreme discomfort and anger.

“It’s not about what I deserve or not, Sooyoung-ah,” she took off her shoes, placed a bag of fruits on the ground and came up the stairs. “Let’s talk later, please?”

Seungwan put her palm on the younger’s shoulder, and the latter thought for a tad before she shot the last gaze at the Velvet.

“Remember what I said, Juhyun-ssi.” She warned and covered the delicate hand of her unnie with her own, then turned to leave.

When she was out of their vision, the elder became even more agitated. Seungwan’s soft eyes pored over their face, and the raven wished she didn’t stand this nigh.

“I’m sorry,” she let out, and it hit the taller person like a ton of bricks. 

Why was she looking at them with those shining stars under her lids? She should have said something bitter, something that would have served as a reason for them to alienate her.

“You have nothing to be sorry about. Go away now,” Juhyun forced out and shielded their face with an inscrutable mask.

Seungwan knit her brows as she lowered her eyes for a moment, fingers fiddling with the fabric of her skirt.

“I understand why you are doing this, Juhyun-ssi. But you shouldn’t. I… still like you,” she lifted her head up and met the glassy gaze of the raven. 

“You don’t know what you are saying-”

“I know that perfectly well. And I know what I feel,” she caught them off guard by cutting them off.

“Forget it, Son Seungwan. I will leave this place soon and we’ll never meet again.”

It was the first time Juhyun watched fear so graphically covering someone’s face.

“Wh-what?” Her heart was carved out of her chest. No, not like that. It was ripped out with cruel hands.

Saying every word was heartless, but necessary. She should hate them.

“I am leaving and I’ll never return here. Now go away.”

They had to do this. Out of sight, out of mind. Right?

“Why?” She squeaked quietly and her stomach clenched as if she was falling somewhere.

“I said GO AWAY.”

“No! No one is banishing you from here! You can stay as long as you want. With me… Yerimie, with all of us,” Seungwan said, desperate. 

It was all her fault. Her fault Juhyun was mangled, wanted to leave. She didn’t mean all of this. She needed them here, beside her so she could heal them with her love, redeem herself. 

“I can’t.”

“You can,” the girl unexpectedly took the Velvet by the hand.

“Seungwan…” 

She pressed their palm to her chest, right where her heart went into hysterics.

“I was never scared that much, Juhyun-ssi. Not even the day my family was killed,” her eyes filled with tears of sorrow and she spoke pleadingly to the raven. “It’s all my fault and I’m so awfully sorry… It’s my fault they did it to you… But, please, don’t leave… Let me be around you… Please. I-”

The elder yanked their hand back. Panic creeped upon them along with disgust. She shouldn’t touch them any more.

“Sstop it, Seung-” 

“I lied,” Seungwan stated in a low voice as she examined the Velvet’s damaged arm, and Juhyun’s brows furrowed more. “I’ve said I want nothing from you… I lied.”

Suddenly, she stood too close and her palms cradled their face.

“I want you to stay. Please, Juhyun-ssi… Allow me more time,” her thumb caressed the raven’s skin, and the latter feared they would die from a heart attack, so much the motion affected them. “If you feel you cannot love me back, then I’ll… let you go…”

Petrified, Juhyun couldn’t move, breathe or think. They were wrapped into her orangy whiff, muffled in her warm hands and captured by her eyes — that was absurd, but they could do nothing about it. She had gained even more power over them.

“S-Seungwan… Sstop this.”

“I can’t… And don’t want to…”

With that, she stood on her toes and pulled them closer, her lips gently pressing against their chin, making the Velvet forget everything they had told her; all they had thought about.

Mayhap they would settle and let themselves be held by her. They would stay and allow her do to them whatever she wanted. Juhyun was in their darkest days; it wouldn’t be worse than it already was. 

The way her hands trembled out of nervousness, how she almost choked on tears as her lips grazed their cheek — all that made the raven feel their heart fester. As if her scalding drops were salt to their open wound. If the elder could hurt her now, where was the confidence they wouldn’t do that later as well? If they left, it would bring her pain, but only once. Yet if they stayed, they would make her cry again and again. 

Juhyun desperately did not want that. It was her smile that made them giddy, her dilated beaming pools of brown that caused their chest to heave up to a pause, her undivided attention that prompted them to search for her presence. Seungwan had indented her patterns in Juhyun’s soul, and they knew it deep, deep inside where they never let themselves descend. Because if they did, it would mean only one thing, and they’d have to fess it up — Juhyun was falling for her.

The thought beat them to the knees. Their legs got numb and with a stifled whine they slumped down to the floor; the woman unable to hold them up. She sagged before them the next second, her fingers still a feather to their skin as she painted it with smooth lines, swabbing tears down.

“You took good care of me… of us last time, Juhyun-ah… I want to…need to care for you now. You can’t leave,” her arms looped around the Velvet’s head as she pressed her own to its side. 

Unable to see her features, her crinkled brows and pursed lips, the Velvet could only melt into her welcoming warmth that she draped over their being. The curtains of their lids were heavy, all the way drooping to hide the brightness of the world from the raven, even though it was not as colourful for them as before. The shake of their inhale resonated in Seungwan, so she hugged Juhyun tighter, afraid to let go.

“You don’t need me. I’m a monster,” their voice was threaded with anguish, and it spurred the woman to place a chaste kiss to their temple before she bent slightly to look them in the eye.

“You’re not,” she murmured. “I need you. Don’t leave me… Please.”

Her soft lips enveloped the spot on their forehead, and the Velvet sank into her. Their mind struggled while their heart screamed for more.

“I’m not that Juhyun you liked… And I will never be.”

Seungwan shook her head, eyelashes fluttering as her gaze shifted between pink and amethyst.

“It doesn’t matter… Juhyun-ssi of tomorrow will differ from Juhyun-ssi of today, yet I still will love you,” she traced a finger along the sharpened brow, blew soft air onto Juhyun’s closed lids as if drying their waters away. “I’m not that Seungwan who confessed to you back then. Tomorrow I’ll not be the same as today. And I can love you every day like for the first time if you let me…”

“I can’t…” The raven wheezed out, and their breath was caught again by the girl’s lips on their cheek.

“ _ We _ can… together,” she cooed and gathered the Velvet in her arms, feeling how their hand gently fell onto her upper back as they reciprocated the embrace; her heart started in a full gallop.

_ Together _ .

While Juhyun was present, Seungwan could shine.

She would shine for them like a beacon so that they’d know where to go. 

And by the will of the Universe, 

one day they would come to her.


	13. Chapter 13

“Sooyoung-ah,” Seungwan called as she knocked at the farthest door of their long Г-shaped hanok.

“Come in, unnie,” the girl heard and entered the room.

Bright lights of many candles lit the space, turning it into a warm and cosy place amidst the chill of the night outside. Two beautiful paintings hung on opposite sides of the rectangle — Seulgi’s gifts from long ago. Joy’s bed was still wrapped and the young woman sat at her low table, hovering over the bunch of papers with a head propped on her hand. 

Haetnim, recognising a newcomer, sprang from her corner and came to greet, receiving a tender pat and a scratch behind her ears. 

“Hi, baby,” Seungwan said in a high-pitched voice, picking the dog up and cuddling her in the arms. “Your mommy is busy, huh? Left you all alone?”

“I’m here, by the way!” The raven protested, turning away from the work and focusing on her unnie instead. “You cried.”

The older girl clucked and walked to sit closer to the owner of the room.

“Thank you, I haven’t noticed.”

“Tsk...”

Sooyoung pursed her lips and stared at her guest, who washed her puppy in all the love possible. Seungwan was distressed.

“Do you want some soju?” The younger asked, stacking up the papers and cleaning the table.

“Hmm...”

“You want,” she replied to her own question and got up, put the documents into the cabinet and closed it with a key.

She went to the other side of the room and took the bottle of liquor and two glasses out of the shallow wooden box. Returned to her guest and poured the alcohol the next second.

“Now, drink,” she prompted and held out a shot.

Seungwan dithered but found no apparent reason not to drink tonight. She was tired and a bit of soju would not hurt her.

“Thanks,” she said and gulped, Joy doing the same to her liquor.

As fiery liquid streamed down her throat, the older girl squeezed her eyes shut and pressed the outer side of her wrist to her mouth. The raven took the glass from her hand and filled it again.

“One more, unnie.”

“It’s too much.”

“No, it’s not. Drink.”

“Ugh...”

“Drink this one and let’s talk,” the junior suggested, brushing up her fringe with a free hand.

Once the shots were down and empty vessels found peace on the table, Seungwan returned her attention to Haetnim, who gently chewed on her finger and licked it soon after. She stroked the dog’s white fur, lost in thoughts.

“So,” Joy began observing the interaction. “What are we going to talk about?”

“You sounded so confident a minute ago and now asking about it?”

“Well, I know we need to talk, but I don’t know where to start,” she explained, frowning, pouring more soju.

Brown hairs swayed in a light headshake as the elder woman chuckled to herself.

“Me neither,” she sighed, bringing the puppy closer to her face and kissing the tiny crown. Then she released Haetnim from her hold, but the latter refused to leave and flopped onto the floor, clever eyes beholding the women.

“Let’s have one more,” Joy nodded with a stern tone.

“I… don’t think I’ll be able to talk at all if I drink this much and this fast,” Seungwan snorted with a smirk, yet accepted the offer and killed a shot. This was totally the wrong way of drinking soju. Like, completely wrong.

“It’ll be okay.”

“For you. I’m not used to this,” she pouted, watching crystalline water falling and swirling into her glass.

“I’m not that of a drinker, unnie.”

“Still, you are better at it.”

“At drinking?”

“No, at not getting drunk.”

“It’s the same.”

“Whatever,” Seungwan’s brow cocked up but as she put an elbow on the table and underpinned her chin her gaze set at the vis-à-vis.

“That’s Yerimie’s favourite word,” Sooyoung declared, taking a sip.

“Oh my god, really? As her sister, I obviously wouldn’t know that!”

Joy waved a hand, rolling her eyes in fake annoyance.

“She has a much fatter influence on you than you have on her,” she chortled. “And it’s a negative one.”

“Are you saying my turtle is a demon?” The elder asked, her browns growing bigger in amazement. A smile threatened to capture her mouth.

“Considering your turtle can’t even swim, yes. She is a demon. Everyone knows it,” the raven nodded with a blank face, yet gleeful flickers betrayed her.

“She would have killed us if she heard it,” Seungwan whispered, putting an opened hand to the side of her lips as if telling a secret. 

“Ha! You see! This is exactly why she is a demon!” Joy burst out and hit her palm at the table. 

“Well, out of the two of us, someone has to be a demon. Because I am an angel.” She cracked a grin, but noticing it, took a breath and recomposed her expression into a passive one. It wasn’t a successful attempt, though.

“That’s right, that’s right,” the younger agreed, teeth shining brighter than all the candles in the room. She sipped again, and her guest did the same. “You are _an_ _angel_.”

Seungwan gasped, sporting a look of disbelief at her dongsaeng.

“Are you saying I am not?!”

“Who? Me? I would never! You are the angelest angel I’ve ever seen!”

“Is there even such a word?” The elder beamed, amused.

“Now there is. The angelest angel — Son Seungwangel,” Joy stated with a proving blink of her eyes and cackled.

The brunette laughed, a merry warble filling the dimension and transforming it into a lighter place.

“The hell are we talking about?” She asked in between giggles.

“HUH? You  _ shouuuldn’t _ say such words, Son Seungwangel! Hell is for demons!”

“I can say whatever I want,” was a reply accompanied by another chuckle.

“That’s Yerimie’s beloved word!” Sooyoung puffed, popping her eyes out as if she had discovered the sense of life.

“SHUSH! Are you trying to summon her or something!? She will send us to hell if you don’t stop!” The elder hissed, throwing nervous glances at the door. “I swear, she appears out of nowhere if you call her name three times!”

“Or something! Demonest demon — Gim Yerimon,” the raven tittered, all the more excited by the way her unnie’s face grew longer in incredulity.

_ “Unnie?”  _ A voice from behind the barrier reached the duo inside.

Seungwan swung her head to the entrance, then to the girl nearby, who stared at her in shock. Haetnim’s tail propelled in excitement, yet her mommy pressed her entire body to the ground. ‘I TOLD YOU!’ was screamed by the elder’s eyes as she hid her neck in her shoulders and stilled her breath.

_ “Unnie?” _ Yerim repeated, still waiting for a reply.

Sooyoung motioned to the door with her nose, trying hard to telepathically convey to her pal whatever thoughts she had at that time. But the brunette shook her head vigorously, pointing a finger at Joy and then at the door, beckoning her to answer.

“She is  _ your sister _ !” The younger whispered.

“At  _ your room _ !” Bickered the shorter woman even quieter.

“Tsk, fine,” her orbs swivelled under her lids as she tightened her lips to the side. And shouted, “Yes, Yerim-ah! What’s wrong?”

_ “May I come in?”  _

Seungwan was about to break her neck — so fast she joggled her head. Joy sent her a disapproving look.

“It’s not the best moment, dear. Sorry. What’s wrong?”

_ “Have you seen unnie? She went out and still hasn’t showed up,” _ the poor girl asked, and Sooyoung shot an even more disapproving gaze at the brunette who shrugged and spread her risen hands in an apologetic motion.

“I’ve seen her with Juhyun-ssi, she’s alright. Go rest now,” she responded and watched Seungwan miming something to her with a pleading face. The raven mirrored the latter’s recent expression of regret and puckered her mouth.

_ “Okay...” _ The junior sighed.  _ “If you meet her before I do, tell her I’ll kill her!” _

A devilish grin appeared across Joy’s lips.

“Oh, I’ll come to see that!”

_ “Whatever,” _ Yerim snorted.  _ “I go now.” _

“Bye-bye~” The taller woman chirped.

The couple inside the room kept mum for a little. Just in case. Before the older whisper-screamed:

“I TOLD YOU SHE WOULD APPEAR IF YOU CALL HER THREE TIMES, DIDN’T I?”

“I THOUGHT YOU JOKED!” Sooyoung echoed.

“HOW CAN I JOKE ABOUT DEMONS?!”

“QUIT YELLING AT ME! IT’S YOU WHO MADE YOUR SISTER WORRY!”

“I CAME TO OUR ROOM AFTER I LEFT JUHYUN-SSI! SHE WASN’T THERE AND IT’S NOT MY FAULT SHE LOST ME!”

“Tsk, tsk...” The raven arched her brows and wagged her head. “And you call yourself Seungwangel!”

Her guest almost choked at her liquor as she drew a loud gasp.

“ _ I _ call? It was  _ you _ who called me like that!”

“Tsk, tsk… Let’s drink.”

“I  _ was _ drinking a second ago!” The girl pointed out at the wet spot on her skirt — the supposed evidence of her telling the truth.

“But now you are _ not _ ! So drink again!”

“ _ You _ drink!”

“I  _ am _ !”

“ _ Good _ !”

Arms swished, lips wetted and intoxicating liquid slid against the tongues, adding fire to the warmed bodies that broke into a peal of thick laughter as soon as the glasses kissed the surface of the table.

“How,” Seungwan rasped out after the pair calmed down. She was fiddling with her vessel, ”How do you know I’ve slept with Juhyun-ssi?”

“This is  _ my _ house. I always know who sleeps with whom here,” Joy said and studied the woman nearby.

“I… don’t want you to sleep with them anymore,” the elder lowered her voice, looking at Sooyoung dead in the eye.

The latter smirked, “Why? Because  _ you  _ slept with them?”

“No.”

“Then why? I like sex with Juhyun-ssi. I bet you know the reason for that now,” Joy made a mini-vortex out of her drink.

“Because it’s just sex for you… And I have feelings for them.”

“What about Juhyun-ssi?” She asked and her friend’s face fell. “I see… So, what if they come to me?”

“Turn them down,” was muttered, and the girl pecked her glass, trying to hide her emotions behind it.

“Very undemanding.”

“Sooyoung-ah...”

“Do you know what Juhyun-ssi once said when I asked about them being jealous of me and Seulgi-ssi?” The raven quirked her mouth. “They said that no one belongs to anyone and that everyone can sleep with whomever they want.”

Seungwan’s gloom deepened, and she bit her lip, staring at the drink in her hand.

“What if they ask for any other girl here?” Joy recollected her recent talk with the subject of the current conversation. “You can’t guard them from everybody only because you like them.”

“I’m not… guarding them...”

“So what is it about?”

“It’s about you and me… And I’m asking you to stop sleeping with them.”

“What will you do if I say ‘no’?” The younger sipped again, taking time to scrutinise her unnie, who cast her a gaze full of confusion.

“Will you?”

“Don’t know. Yet. I am not your rival, and I also have Seulgi-ssi, though I still don’t get why I should stop that.” 

“Because you are my friend.”

“Good point,” she nodded and emptied her glass. “Just explain to me one more thing: how can you have something for Juhyun-ssi when they treat you like some… like...”

“It’s nothing, Sooyoung-ah…”

“Nothing?! Are you crazy?” The raven snapped, feeling a recent rage swallowing her. “How is that nothing when they behave like a piece of shit?”

“It’s not what it looks-”

“It’s exactly what it looks like! They  _ hurt _ you! And not even once!”

“I told them about my feelings, Sooyoung-ah. They think if they hurt me I’ll recede...”

“ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW!?”

“Sh! Don’t yell,” Seungwan hissed as she placed a hand above the one of Joy’s.

“WHY the hell do they do it if they KNOW how you FEEL?! It’s even worse than I thought!” Joy was trembling with anger. She needed a drink. “Fucking… I should have  _ slapped _ them!”

“Stop it, please. You don’t know the reason-”

“Then tell me!”

“I… can’t,” the girl’s voice cracked at the memory. She couldn’t explain. And didn’t want to. If it was possible, she would have forgotten that for the better.

“Fuck those reasons! If they do not want you, they should have just rejected you straight away! But they even got into your pants!”

“It’s… not what it looks like... Actually, I… asked for it...” The elder confessed, suddenly embarrassed. She put both of her hands into her lap and started wrinkling the fabric of the skirt. “And it was before I revealed my feelings...”

“SO… It was you who fucked Juhyun then?” The raven wondered, squinting.

“I… initiated...”

“And how was it?”

“What?” 

“Sex,” the taller girl draped over the table and peered at Seungwan who squirmed under the attention. “How was it?”

“I’m… not going to talk about it...”

“Why? Was it that bad?”

“No...”

“So it was good?”

“Sooyoung-ah!” The brunette flashed, inwardly relieved that her friend’s mood shifted to a more positive spectre.

“I want to know how it was for you! I can tell you my-”

“Oh, no, no, no! Thank you, I’m fine with not knowing anything,” she cut off and refilled the glasses again, her dried throat aching for moisture.

“So tell me, how was it? I bet Juhyun-ssi did something dirty with that innocent baby face on.”

“Uuuughhhh… Okay! Fine! It was amazing! Wonderful! I cried! Happy now?”

A sly grin wreathed over the younger, and she straightened her spine, pleased.

“For now, I am. Of course, I’d prefer ins and outs of the story...” She trailed off, slurping from her glass with shimmering eyes. “But that tongue is out of this world, right?”

She guffawed at the saucers that shone instead of browns, Seungwan’s ears reddening so much she must have been burning under the images in her mind. Haetnim barked, noticing something was going on and got caressed the next moment by her owner.

“I give you my word, those two are the best at eating out! I’ve felt nothing like that with men,” Joy added, cackling, for her unnie had placed her hands over the ears and screwed her face.

“Stop, stop, stop! I don’t want to know this! I need _ not _ to know!” The elder groaned, skin melting from the heat that seemed to come from the bones.

“That’s exactly why it gets addictive with them. You just can’t get enough of those lips and-”

“AAgghhh, stop it!” Seungwan leapt forward and shut the younger’s mouth with her palm. “Why do you all have to talk about such things?!”

She could sense lips curving under her hand and the raven’s brows wriggled suggestively.

“OH, no, that was a rhetorical question! I  _ don’t _ need an answer to that! Please spare me from any comments!  _ Please! _ ”

Joy giggled and snorted, tugging at her pal’s wrist and moving it away from her mouth.

“Why? Are you getting wet?” She asked and roared with laughter as the shorter girl’s soul fled from her body.

“Oh my god, Sooyoung! You have no shame!!!”

“And  _ you  _ shouldn’t either! So next time you have sex sit on their face. You’ll never forget that! I swear!”

“You’re unbearable...” Seungwan sighed, hiding her eyes and cheeks in her palms.

“Unbearable will be their tongue and lips, unnie,” the raven spelt and broke up after the grunt of defeat from the woman. 

The latter tasted the liquor and sprawled on her side across the table.

“I’m getting drunk, Sooyoung-ahhh,” she sang, drawing absentminded circles over the wooden top with a finger. “I’m getting drunk whenever I see them. Have you ever felt like this?”

“No...” The junior exhaled, cradling the dog in her arms. “I felt thirsty, but never drunk...”

“I can’t think straight… Sometimes I want to hug them to death. Not that I want them to die, but just hold so tightly...”

“What...” Joy paused, adjusting her thoughts yet again. “What if they want only sex from you?”

“I’ll give them what they want...”

“But what about what  _ you _ want?”

“I want to be around Juhyun-ssi. As long as I can... To love them. I’m happy simply with that.”

Her voice was soft and sentimental, and her eyes sparkled with fondness her friend had never seen before.

“You’re drunk,” the raven stated.

“Very much, Sooyoung-ah. So very much...”

“I didn’t know it was  _ that _ serious for you,” the girl squeezed Haetnim and kissed her head. “I suspected you had something for them but never expected you to approach them.”

“If I hadn’t got jealous at some point, I would have never acknowledged my feelings. You helped me.”

“You’re indeed an angel, unnie,” came in a whisper.

Seungwan smiled, warmth spreading from her every fibre.

“When everybody is a demon, someone has to be an angel.”

“So bold of you to say such things to one of the demons then! Aren’t you scared we’ll spoil you?”

The brunette chuckled, raising her head and pillowing it over her arm.

“You do that every day. I must have been the angelest angel in this demoniacal world to withstand it!”

“You’ve never been closer to the truth!” Joy tee-heed. “And stop hypnotising the glass! Drink it if you want!”

“I feel like you’ll have to catch me later if I drink more.”

“Do I look bothered?”

“No,” she chortled.

“Then let’s make someone else catch us later, huh?”

“ _ Huh _ !”

-

The door to their room slammed open, and Juhyun jumped at their table, spilling a cup of freshly brewed tea all over their front and hissing at the sensations it brought. They cursed under their breath and craned their neck to check who had the courage to behave in such a manner so late at night.

Their face elongated while their brain stopped working for several seconds as two girls broke inside the space holding onto each other’s arms. The taller one straightened her spine, pulling her companion up as well, then put on a so called clever expression and gazed around. When her eyes fell over the stunned raven, she pursed her lips and smirked, clucking her tongue.

“Found’ya!” She exclaimed with such a triumph the owner of the room wondered whether they had been hiding all this time.

The shorter woman smiled once she also recognised Juhyun. Without distancing from one another, the uninvited guests shut the door with the same loud snap as before, giggling at that as if wood banging against wood was the most humorous thing in this world.

“Why… are you both here?” The Velvet asked as they gathered their mind back into one piece. With a wrinkled up face, they loured at the liquid over the top of the table and at an empty vessel in their hand. What a waste of precious flavour! 

Sighing, they put the cup down and stood up right when the girls wambled closer to them with unexplainable looks on their reddened faces.

“Are you drunk?” Juhyun squinted at the women, patting the wet patch on their clothes. They smelled alcohol now.

“I’m not. SHE’s!” Joy blinked slowly and embraced Seungwan’s shoulder.

“Mhm...” The elder’s brow quirked as they studied the intruders. “What are you doing here? Go sleep.”

“Pfft! No! I mean… yes! We’re sleeping here! With you!”

With that she pushed her unnie towards the Velvet, forcing them to catch the girl, and walked around them, suddenly back-hugging.

“Wha- Yah! What are you doing!?” The older raven tensed as soft hands slid over their chest while an even softer body melted into them from behind. They still kept unsteady Wannie in their hold as she was stargazing them with a dreamy and adoring eyes.

“Exactly what’ya’sked for,” Sooyoung breathed out into their ear, and they morphed to that. 

“Wh-? Wait! Stop!” Juhyun panicked, unhandling the woman in front and clasping a sneaky hand on their frame. Okay, clear as a day it was Joy’s idea to come, and they understood that, but why was Seungwan here? How could she be here? And why was she bringing her palms around their face with those dimmed browns? Were these two  _ that drunk _ ?!

“Hyun...” The brunette rasped, her gaze falling to their lips, making them hot and scared and sidetracked. These women shouldn’t be here… Shouldn’t touch them like this…

No, no… It was wrong. So wrong!

SO VERY WRONG were those hands that snaked into their pants!

With a desperate grunt and a stiffened moan, Juhyun shoved Seungwan away from them, seized the naughty girl’s wrist and yanked it out of their trousers; bitter sensations spread over their mouth and throat; heart darkening and bleeding out.

“Why?” Sooyoung cooed, rubbing her fingers over their abdomen. “Don’cha like it? I remember you were  _ very  _ insistent earlier today...”

“It’s not funny, Joy,” the elder pulled her around and now both women faced them. “Leave. B-both...”

The brunette pouted like a child deprived of her favourite toy and leaned into the junior raven who licked her lips with victorious flickers in her orbs causing Juhyun to wince at that.

This was not what they wanted. They should never touch these adorable and perfect girls, never even dream of them lecherously; some other no-names would fit for their filthy sex needs, but not these little birds. They couldn’t taint them with their dirty desires.

“We’re not makin’ fun,” the youngest replied and ogled the person in front as she untied the ribbon on her unnie’s shirt. “Though, it’s fun.”

Seungwan seemed to be in a vinous trance as she barely responded to the outer world, just gazing at the Velvet with hearts for her browns. Sooyoung embosomed the elder woman from the back, opening the latter’s garment enough to reveal billowing collarbones, took her hands and pressed them to the elder’s chest with a devilish smirk. It was amusing how the taller raven froze onto the ground, ragged puffs bursting forth and internal war depicting over their face. Joy put her head on the shorter girl’s shoulder, slumping a bit to glide two pairs of palms down the tightened stomach of the person in front.

Juhyun’s limbs turned into stone as their body strung with spine-tingling memories and feelings — they disconnected from it yet again and observed everything from a distance. 

“It’s us who caught someone, huh,” Sooyoung sang in a steamy voice, her unnie’s hands in hers as together they aimed to the Velvet’s waistband. 

“Is it fun?” Somebody but not Juhyun asked, and the youngest turned her head at Seulgi, who stood behind her with an inexplicable expression on their face.

They had been in the room for some time already; those drinkers simply overlooked their presence. They came because of their mate experiencing strong and confusing feelings, and it worried them. 

“Oh, yes, my tiger cub… Wanna join?”

“Leave them,” Seulgi shot a glance at their friend who looked worse than a corpse.

“Baaaad idea...” Joy returned her head on the woman’s shoulder. “Busy.”

“Leave them! Wannie won’t appreciate this when she sobers up,” the younger Velvet uttered, pulling long arms of the raven girl away. They tore her from the shorter one and dragged to the exit.

“She won’t remememember… She’s dr’nk!”

“I hope so,” they mumbled and forced her outside, closing the door with no sound. “What the fuck are you doing?”

Seulgi hauled Sooyoung down the stairs where she wiggled free and picked up her shoes, waving them in front of monolid eyes.

“Nothing… They asked for other girls! Dickhead...” She cast her footwear onto the ground, “SHH!” 

“...I see-”

“Piece’o’shit!” The woman yelled, falling into the arms of the Velvet and pressing her cheek to their chest, tearing up as she cuddled them. “I also wanna ge’drunk… this much…”

“Joy-”

“I’m her friend! It’s the las’time… I prom’sed. Going to be a good’riend… I’ve no one… just’er...”

“Sooyoung-ah,” the taller crooned, stroking her hair as they reciprocated the hug. She cried, and they couldn’t identify the reason; her speech was too blurry for them. “Let’s go to your room. You need to get a sleep.”

“No,” she shook her head and hid her face, clutching them, digging nails into their back. “Can I… stay’in your’oom? Please? I’ll be a good girl...”

“Come,” Seulgi sighed, carefully prompting her to move so they could put shoes on her feet. They sent an eye to their mate’s door, hoping the brunette would not worsen the situation, and led the mess of a woman to their chamber. 

Seungwan was bad at controlling her movements. When the figure from behind her disappeared, she had nothing to do but stand on her own legs. Yet since it was too difficult, she floated, collapsed on the floor, disoriented. Shirt slid down her shoulder as she gasped; tall and rigid frame standing still in front of her.

WHY? Why was she here? Why did she come? Had Joy told her about their request? If yes, why had she agreed to come? Did she want to test them? Play them? Or was she just drunk? She looked so plastered... 

With significant force of will, Juhyun made an unsteady step back but landed on their butt with a wallop, hand grasping the fabric at their sternum, where heartache grew with every second.

The woman’s head rolled around, and she sprawled on her side with a soft groan against her parted mouth.

They should run right now. Run and leave her alone. Or else they’d die from overthinking. From her closeness. Appearance. They wanted to cry how bad they felt now.

They were so dirty, so guilty, so unforgivable all of a sudden. 

Disgusting.

Like an animal.

Untamed and ugly.

_ Run _ .

Juhyun clawed their way from the room, flying over the stairs, falling hard on their knees as their legs buckled. Fear clogged their throat and acid tears trenched their skin as they scuttled to their mate, who by the grace of the spirits had just left their chamber. Joy had fallen asleep, and they decided to take a walk to cool down the turmoil of their friend’s feelings.

“Seulgi!” The elder husked, bumping into the tall frame. “I’m a monster, Seulgi! I’m a  _ monster _ ! Monster...”

***

It was a warm sunny day. Juhyun was returning from the pond where they had spent the entire morning from the very dawn. They had developed a poor sleeping schedule lately, mainly because nightmares invaded them each time they closed their eyes. It was common for the raven to experience changes to their resting hours, yet they were not accustomed to such real and cruel dreams. It felt like they lived another life during their sleep.

The Velvet rose their hands and rubbed their face and lids, sighing from constant tiredness that became their second skin. Even the fact that their arm had healed quite good and they could use it for trivial matters did little to brighten their mood. Their mental and emotional conditions got worse with each night they spent under the terrors of their mind. At one point, Juhyun started hallucinating after the wakening, stunned with such a horror they couldn’t let out a sound. 

Today was the same story. They woke up and spent several minutes under the invisible pressure pinning them down to the bed and making them gasp for air. And when they returned the sense of their body it was covered with sweat as if they had showered in their nightclothes. To say it was terrible meant to say nothing.

So the raven had lugged themselves to a beloved spot and spent the whole morning drawing lines and circles over the surface of the water, contemplating their life and pacifying their heart.

When they entered the backyard, a tickling sensation appeared in their nose, making them sneeze loudly. They glanced around in search of somebody and laughed at themselves as they realised how ridiculous they must have looked doing so. Nevertheless, a good, strong sneeze made them relaxed. 

As their legs toted their body back to the room, Juhyun’s attention swayed to the girl whom they hadn’t seen for several days already. Did she forget about them? Had she understood they were odious? Did she remember what had happened that night? Or was she simply busy? Even if she was, didn’t she have time to come and check on them?

“You’re getting greedy, Bae Juhyun,” they mumbled; pouted, suddenly sad and dispirited.

They wanted her to check on them and at the same time they didn’t. Further from them she was, the better. Yet it burned craters in their heart, caused their thoughts to travel to her whenever the Velvet had free time. 

And they had it a lot.

Out of nowhere, a sound breathed through the air, and the raven flinched, unable to control themselves. They swung on their heels and looked at the direction of the noise. There was no one. With a troubled frown, they sped up and cornered the building. Maybe it was someone from the new lodgers who had been living here for a few days. And they were all men, so Juhyun would prefer to not meet any of them for they weren’t ready yet.

Another sound reached their ears, but much closer this time, and they boggled, staggering to the side. It was not funny anymore.

“... _ animal… untamed animal... _ ” someone whispered over them.

They jumped, a strained yelp stalled in their throat, blood rushing to their head so fast the world wafted before their eyes.

And then they hit a foreign body, fell backwards, unable to recognise to whom that belonged. They saw it was big and wide, and it made them freeze with fear. It couldn’t be  _ him _ , right? This place protected them...

The figure spoke to them, and it cut their skin with thousands of knives. Juhyun huddled up, pressed themselves into the ground and tried to grip onto something, but nothing was around them except dust. Their heart worn itself out drumming inside, bringing icy blood to a halt in their veins. And when that body bent to them and grabbed them by their wrists, the Velvet lost connection to their physical form.

They screamed on the verge of tears, but they knew nobody would hear them because it was their inner voice, an inner plea to stop whatever was going to happen to them. They wouldn’t live through another ignominy. It’d be better to die than to have those mares repeat.

“The  _ fuck _ are you  _ doing _ to them!!!” Seulgi jumped from the porch with a blare, storming to push a guy away from their mate, who turned into a broken statue.

When a heavy pain tugged the younger raven, they woke up and the next instant rushed to the door. Juhyun was so small, lying there with a face full of unadulterated terror when a man from a neighbouring room curved over them, saying something the taller Velvet couldn’t discern.

“She bumped into me and… and I tried to pick her up,” the guest responded, confused, as he regained stability and pulled his shirt back after the shove had misplaced it.

“Shhh, my love, it’s me,” Seulgi purred, cradling the shivering elder in their arms. The latter was soaked in a cold sweat, their body stiff and numb; tears pouring down in silence. The younger leaned in and hid Juhyun’s face in their chest, pressing a hand to their dead-white cheek, then turned to the guy who stood there not knowing what to do. “Go wherever you’re going to! And don’t fucking ever touch them or I’ll rip your fucking arms off!”

“I didn’t… I-”

“I said go the FUCK  _ AWAY _ !”

The man bowed down as he crawfished, then skedaddled; clouds of smut following his steps.

“Hyun-ah, it’s me, Seulgi. I’m here, love, you’re safe… No one’s around except for me now,” tigerish eyes searched for the amethyst and pink ones, but the elder seemed to be deep in shock, not responding to anything. Moreover, they were hyperventilating. “Please, Juhyun-ah, look at me. Don’t cry… I’m here, I’m with you, my love...”

The taller Velvet pressed their lips to the mate’s forehead, stroked their hair with soothing motions, murmuring to and comforting them. And if the former thought it couldn’t get worse, they were wrong — their only one coughed, for their nose started bleeding. 

Seulgi gasped, moved Juhyun into a sitting position and tilted their head forward to facilitate breathing; red streams covering the latter’s mouth and chin and clothes on the front.

The younger moaned, several sighs away from the anxiety attack. They sensed extreme pain inside, both from the person beside and themselves.

“Slower, love, breathe in slower,” they urged and also did as they had told. “Exhale… Now inhale, two, three, four, exhale, two, three, four...”

After noticing Juhyun was getting back into senses, Seulgi cupped their face and turned to check whether those eyes would focus on them. The entire world’s weight was taken from their shoulders as the elder looked at them, although with panic and endless woe. 

“It’s me, Hyun-ah...”

“Seulgi...” They wheezed almost inaudibly.

“You’re safe. I’m with you,” the younger kissed their mate’s forehead again. “You’re with me.”

“Seulgi… He hw’ound me, Seulgi...” They cried, lips sticking to each other from the blood. “Bu’ I can’ any more, Seulgi...”

“Shhh, love. He won’t touch you, I promise. Don’t think about him. Think about me and tteokbokki, how we’ll eat it under the blue clear skies, okay? You’ll love it so much, and tteok will be so chewy, you won’t get enough of it,” another peck came to the shorter Velvet’s head along with soft palms caressing their hair while a mellow voice drew pictures of pleasant and tasty future. “And the sauce… Can you already smell it? It’ll be delicious, with a perfect amount of spiciness. Exactly what you love.”

“P-promise?” 

Seulgi’s heart broke at the tiny sound which had escaped that dark red mouth. 

“Promise,” they reassured, pulling Juhyun into an embrace. “And if you’d like to invite someone else, then let’s have an entire picnic together. With fruits and drinks and cakes you like. Everything you want, love. I’ll get the Moon for you if you need it...”

“Yes, I need moon...” A light nod was felt over the younger’s shoulder as their friend weakened against them — last bits of strength sapped by too much feelings. “I miss her...”

“Her?”

“ _ Mmmoon _ ,” they emphasised, disoriented by the woozy mind that throbbed in their skull. They missed her  _ so _ very much, and she had just disappeared from their welkin; left them mooning around, lost and forgotten. Was she shining on the other side of the world now? Why couldn’t she reappear sooner? “Me moon’s boo’ful...”

“Shit,” Seulgi hissed when they parted from their mate. “Still flows...”

“...Ah? Look me...”

“You’re raving, Hyunie.”

“...turning round-uh...”

“I’m taking you to my room, you need to sleep off,” the taller Velvet cooed, gathering Juhyun in their arms. 

“...shiny… warm… sof’n curve… mooooovin’...”

“Oh, I see where you’re going...” They chuckled, listening to burbling getting a pinch more explicit as they climbed the stairs. This was better than recalling about rape and monsters; than being immobilised by fear and suffering. 

“...Ah love Ddeulgi...”

“I love you, too,” they smiled, settling nid-nodding Juhyun against the wall. 

“...bu’me goin’ love me moon…  _ hard-eu _ ...”

“Let’s stop your nosebleed and then you can love both of us the way you want, okay?”

“Mm… Ah can love?”

Hope threaded their naif tone and it sounded more like a plea. The elder sighed so heavily with their mouth open as if to exhale all the blackness that plagued their soul.

“Me animal… Ah’ate… animaws… Scary animaws,” they whimpered, sloping to the side. Tumbled onto the floor. Snuffled and coughed. How could they love anybody? Such animals couldn’t love; weren’t allowed to love. 

Their eyes closed, tears cascading as their mate returned to them with rags and water. 

“I love you, Hyun-ah,” Seulgi murmured, transferring their friend’s head onto their knees. They wetted the cloth and wiped the blood away. “ _ She _ loves you. Many other people love you. You’re not an animal. You’re-” — their voice broke and lips trembled — “a phoenix… Beloved, beautiful, the only. And you… can love, Hyun-ah...”

“... Ah can?”

“Yes, my love… Your heart is so big that you can love as many souls as you want...”

“Promise?”

“Promise...”

“Ah wan’to,” Juhyun gave a weak nod and placed their palm over the mate’s hand. “Help me.”

“Always, my love… Always.”


	14. Chapter 14

Juhyun stood near the fence that separated the backyard from the women’s quarters. Even though the raven was not defined as a male, they decided not to tempt their luck and not to enter the premises. 

It was a hot sunny day, the bright ball in the skies was high and potent, pressing its rays onto everything on the ground, making a mess out of it. 

As Juhyun ran a hand over the sable hair to show more skin of their face to the soft breeze, they leaned against the fence, waiting for Seungwan. It was the day they were finally going to visit her parents. 

It would also be their first time going to the town since the incident. 

“You look troubled,” a melodious voice reached the Velvet’s ears, and they turned their head to the owner of it.

A girl. One of working here. 

Juhyun’s brow arched on their forehead as if living an independent life on the map of it; confusion darkening their eyes. 

The woman smirked and came closer, her light brown hair streaming along her upper body, creating a wavy curtain around her tall figure. Quite a beauty.

“Pardon?” Juhyun vocalised, watching the girl float towards them to stop right in front. 

“You seem stressed, Bae Juhyun-ssi,” she sang as her head tilted to the side just a bit, gaze curious and piercing. “Would you like me to help?”

The raven blinked, gears in their head turning rapidly to translate the meaning behind her words. She examined them keenly. Her monolid eyes stopped to rest on Juhyun’s lips before she returned them to meet the latter’s soft squint.

“What made you think I need help?” The elder asked, and their hand delved into the pocket for the carved wooden box.

When it set comfortably in their palm, they flicked it open with a thumb, dear treats peeking out to be savoured.

The girl kept mum as she observed the Velvet collecting a tight green ball with their mouth, and as soon as Juhyun closed the lid with a sharp sound, her lips stretched into a smug smile.

“You are here alone,” she reached her arm out and dusted off the specks from the raven’s collar; and the latter was sure their clothes were perfectly clean. “I see in your eyes that you’re lost.”

“Ah’m waiting for someone,” they remarked, pretending not to care about what she had done.

The leaf untangled in their mouth after a round or two of tossing, and now was pressed flat against Juhyun’s tongue, oozing bittersweet flavour to their delight. They put the box into the pocket with attention shifting back to the girl who opted to take a step closer.

“It’s not a problem,” she shook her head, lips curved slyly. “I can make you relax quite fast, Bae Juhyun-ssi.”

She pressed a finger to her bottom lip, white pearls of teeth visible beneath the plump redness of her flesh.

_ Oh _ . As usual.

It was appealing considering the swings of mood Juhyun was still going through, and their need for piacular sex was yet to be satisfied, but the thing was they did not want it in the present circumstances.

The corner of Juhyun’s mouth twitched to the side; a bit of tea swept to their cheek.

“Thank you for the offering, but I’m not interested.”

“Are you sure?”

She made another step and threaded her fingers into the ends of the Velvet’s hair, her eyes dark and luring under the quivering lashes. Her touch was coloured enough to make the raven morph and frown. 

She played with the curls, but once she grew tired of them, her hand travelled up to the elder’s neck. However, the latter caught her by the wrist, interdicting the girl from any further attempts at seduction.

“I’ve told you, I’m not interested right now,” Juhyun crumbled their words to permeate them into the auburn, their hold strong and dominant.

The woman pouted in mock hurt, making an innocent face at the raven. Her other hand landed on Juhyun’s, touching so soothingly to unclasp their fingers. Their lour deepened, forming two wrinkles above their nose bridge; an annoyed expression beaming across them.

“Why? I’m good,” she breathed out and bit her lip, watching the Velvet cockling their nose.

“Go away,” the elder grunted, letting the girl free, and swung their head to the side, fatigued.

Seungwan stood several metres aside from them, hands folded politely at her front.  _ “How long has she been here?”  _ Juhyun thought as they set their gaze at her.

“Well,” the auburn noticed the younger woman too, yet returned her attention to her interest. “Later, maybe.”

She smoothed the ribbon on the raven’s shirt, making sure her digits lingered on their chest, blew them a kiss and took off with a smirk, winking at Seungwan as she passed by.

Once her skirt was hidden by the fence, Juhyun sighed and swallowed the tea leaf.

“You appear out of thin air lately, Seungwan-ah,” they mused and chuckled, hand raking through their hair. They felt somehow uncomfortable in her presence since that odd night.

“To save you, apparently,” a soft smile graced her lips as she finally moved to approach them.

Juhyun chortled, brows jumping up as if amazed. 

“True. She was in my face.”

Seungwan hummed, though hid her eyes from the elder, looking at something beneath her feet.

“Why? What’s wrong?” They cupped her chin and turned her face to them, studying it closely. She instantly melted into their touch, her bright browns focusing just above their cheeks. 

The brunette hugged their hand with her own, bringing it to her lips to kiss, albeit it was protected by the glove.

“Nothing, Juhyun-ssi,” she spoke into their fingers, making the raven hot with burning tickles all over their body while their chest was overloading itself with thick sweetness.

She reddened rapidly, a smile playing at the corners of her lips as if she knew something Juhyun didn’t. They puckered their mouth, taking time to soak in all the little details of her features, realising they once again fell under her spell. Whenever she was this nigh to them the raven was swatted by her aura, and every day it became harder and harder to resist.

“Shall we go?” She inquired, enlacing her fingers with theirs.

Juhyun hummed with twinkling eyes, their grip tightening on her hand as she led them away from the backyard.

Her hair shimmered under the sunlight, cascading around her face, thrilling her shoulders and Juhyun’s heart. Today she was sprinkled with melancholy; darkened clouds of sorrow touching her lungs, causing her to breathe slightly faster than usual. 

“You’re staring, Juhyun-ssi.” 

Seungwan smiled, suddenly shy and adorable, looking at them warmly. She was squeezing the air out of the Velvet.

“Yes, I know,” the elder nodded with a grin, continuing to etch their brain with her looks.

A laugh escaped her lips, settling in Juhyun’s head to ring on repeat. She was doing something to them again, yet they had no clue what exactly.

“Oh, okay then. Didn’t mean to disturb you.”

She was brighter than thousands of stars gathered in one place. 

The duo walked in silence, only the ambient buzz following them to the centre of the town.

“Juhyun-ssi,” her voice came out meekly, and the elder surprised themselves when they drew the girl closer to them. “How- When will your…body unmorph back? I mean… How long does it take to return to the original state?”

“How do you know I’m morphed?” 

“…It wasn’t hard to see  _ how _ she touched you, so...” Her words almost died away while her fingers twitched on the raven’s hand.

“It differs. Someday, it’s just several minutes, sometimes — more than that. If to leave me be. Why?”

“Curious.”

Juhyun hummed, slightly bothered. So... Was she uncomfortable around them? Would she prefer them to never morph in her presence?

“Are you…disgusted by me, Seungwan-ah?”

She stopped and so did their heart. Her brows knit together and she eyed them as if seeing for the first time.

“I’d never- How- I am totally not,” she finally formed her line of thoughts, her chest heaving up and down. “And I’d like you to throw such ideas away from your mind.”

Juhyun managed a sad smile and nodded, wondering whether they could do so — their fear gripped them, making the task difficult. And them not knowing whether she remembered that night with Joy was adding even more concern. She had been very drunk, and they had morphed because of Sooyoung, not  _ her.  _

The duo started walking again, keeping comforting silence between them, though their frames continued communicating through their connected hands.

Suddenly, Juhyun hissed as a stranger bumped into their right arm, hurrying somewhere.

“Hyun-ah!” Seungwan yelped, alarmed. She gripped the hem of their shirt with her free hand.

But it wasn’t only her expression that caused the elder’s gut to burst in warmth.

“I’m fine, I’m fine,” they reassured the woman, a smirk stretching to the side of their lips. “How did you call me?”

As the girl made a step back, her face lit with pinkish hues.

“I think I’ve heard it from you before, though, I’m not sure,” the raven needled their arm around the one of hers, tugging her very close to them. “But I love it. You can call me like that more often, if you want, Seungwanie.”

“Isn’t it too informal?” She asked quietly, ready to shrink into herself at any moment.

Juhyun chuckled, their fingers sliding along her forearm.

“You’ve told me enough informal things to ask such questions now.”

Their mellow voice seeped out into her like the sunlight spread over the surroundings, peeking into the darkest corners of her soul. She should do something to stop herself from losing her mind. For example, say anything; yet no words gathered behind her teeth.

All that because Juhyun was still staring at her with their deep hypnotizing pools, paying no attention to where they were going. Seungwan thought that if she let them go, they’d stumble onto a thing and probably not notice that. The picture in her head made her smile, and the raven pinched her, eliciting a squeak.

“What’s so funny?” 

“Imagined you tripping up,” she said and laughed when Juhyun snorted.

“Should I? If it makes you so merry,” they chaffed, bathing in the warmth she was diffusing.

“If only over my heart.”

The elder popped their eyes out, not trusting their ears. Seungwan bit her lip as scarlet kissed her face, and she turned it away from the Velvet.

“AH, Seungwan-ah!” They bent a little to peek into the woman’s embarrassment, yet she averted her gaze.

Slowing down, they walked the girl to the side of the pathway, pulled her by the arm and swung her to face them. A sudden wave of confusion abruptly changed into painful swelling in their chest that tickled their nose and eyes, threatening to spill in tears.

Seungwan was  _ so _ close. It was terrifying how rapidly she was nearing Juhyun’s heart with every minute; she was a flash of lightning, aiming to strike a lonely tree in an open space. And she had to do nothing special for that — just to breathe the same air. Yet when the girl was near the raven, when she made them joyous, simply held their hand and brought up her browns to look at them (like she had done a second ago) — Juhyun was at sea, forgetting the world existed beyond them. 

“May I…embrace you, Wannie?” 

They could see how her features softened as she lifted up her hands to put them around their neck, hugging warmly.

“You have no idea what you do to me,” Juhyun breathed into her hair, closing their eyes and disappearing from the universe.

They felt her chest rising and falling unsteadily against them, her heart pounding with such a force, she literally quivered with every push. Her fingers curled at their upper back, digging into their clothes until knuckles turned white as if it was the last time they held each other.

“Sorry,” Juhyun murmured, planting a kiss into the woman’s locks. She clung onto them, and they hadn’t promised they wouldn’t leave. They couldn’t yet. And they had answered none of her questions so far. “I’m sorry I make you feel bad all the time...”

“You don’t… I’m happy right now,” she uttered above Juhyun’s shoulder, her voice thin and sweet, and hurt.

“You sound pained-”

“I’m painfully happy,” Seungwan pressed the elder tighter to herself before she let them go. Seeing the muddled and upset face of them, she cupped it in her palms. “No one said what happiness looks like. Mine is...with a pinch of pain and it contrasts because of that.”

She traced the line of Juhyun’s jaw with her thumb, her lips relaxed in the kindest smile. She was right, the Velvet thought. Everyone had their own type of contentment.

“Let’s go, H-Hyun-ah. People… are staring,” Seungwan bolted a glance to some humans, then wrapped her hand around the Velvet’s.

“Not my fault,” the elder pouted and shook their head, pretending to deny the fact that most of the time it was them who drew too much attention. But of course, intimate hugs on the crowded streets were not that common.

Seungwan chortled, “It’s mine. I’m a smasher today.”

“Ha! That’s Yerimie’s influence I see here,” Juhyun laughed as the mood lightened.

“What do you mean?” The girl fluttered her lashes at the elder, mouth puckered cutely. “Are you saying I am not?”

She was teasing, and the Velvet adored this side of her.

“I’ve said nothing,” the raven smirked, watching the girl’s brows shoot up.

“Do you know I gather hearts as easily as apples fallen from a tree?” She grinned widely, however her cheeks turned deep red. “It’s yours that’s green up high, yet.”

A brook of laughter burst through the elder’s lips, melodious and warming to the brunette’s ears. She loved how Juhyun’s one eye was fully closed each time they cracked up while the other glistened with fiery sparkles.

“Said a sprout.” Another chuckle freed itself from the raven’s throat. 

Seungwan drew up her lips, keeping herself from clucking, but then her browns glimmered strangely.

“Don’t you want to put me into your pocket?”

“No,” Juhyun shook their head, their smirk growing even bigger at the face the girl made. “I think you’ll prefer me putting you into my heart instead.”

“And here I thought I’ve rooted there already,” she sighed in a sham pity.

“Mhm,” Juhyun pulled her hand to their mouth and kissed it.

It was so easy… No,  _ too _ easy to make her flame, ergo too tempting to do that time and again. The Velvet couldn’t forbid themselves to witness how she shied away, how her hushed gasp caught her off guard. Yes, she had rooted in their heart. And a long time ago. They simply could not discern that before.

They smooched her hand for a jot until she squirmed from excessive attention — both from the raven and people around. Yet the elder seized her fingers in a death grip, refusing to unhand her.

“Juhyun-ssi...” Seungwan moaned, a tactile feel of strangers’ eyes made her exceedingly conscious while full lips incited her to go ablush. 

“Aigoo,” they exclaimed and let their hands drop to their sides. 

The rest of the way the couple spent with the woman’s dulcet crooning and Juhyun’s periodic swaying to the music of hers; smiles shared between the two of them.

They escaped the bustle of the town and were heading to the hilled suburbs, where a special tree was growing. Since the fire had almost destroyed the neighbourhood five years ago and the military had burned all the remnants of the many bodies later, Seungwan and Yerim had planted a tree as a memorial to their parents. 

It had grown much, and it seemed healthy as bushy branches waved at the duo under the wind’s breath, welcoming the guests.

“I’ll stay here, Seungwan-ah,” Juhyun cooed when they let the girl go with a forward motion of their hand. All in all, she needed some time alone to talk to her parents.

“No, come with me,” she requested and looked at them expectantly, clearly dissent. 

Her arm hovered in the air as she waited for the elder to accept it, which they did as they acquiesced after a moment of consideration. Yes, they had helped the girls to plant this tree, had taken responsibilities towards them and became their second family, yet somehow they felt severely out of the place. Once they had installed this living memorial they had never returned here. 

If Seungwan’s parents were alive, would they have approved of how Juhyun was taking care of their daughters? Would they’ve accepted the Velvet’s behaviour towards Seungwan? 

They wouldn’t have because Juhyun could have done better. And now they were ashamed to appear before them, even if they were just a lone tree on top of the hill.

The younger must have felt the raven’s reluctance, as she sent them a little wink when both of them knelt at the thin trunk where several initials were carved along with simplified faces — Seulgi’s work of art. 

“Hello, mom. Hello, dad,” she said under her breath as she bowed; her pads slid over the notching faintly, a lull settling around. “I hope you remember Juhyun-ssi.”

Her lips tightened in a taste of a smile when Juhyun bowed awkwardly, and as they bumped their head against the trunk, a lighthearted chuckle tickled her tongue. She pressed her palm to the itching spot on the elder’s head, soothing the impact to zero.

“They’re not usually this clumsy,” she trailed off at the Velvet’s pout. “But…even when they are... I love them.”

Her eyes watered, yet an uplift curve never left her mouth. She folded her hands on her lap, fingers trembling, heart throbbing, thoughts pulsating with images in her head as she took some long deep breaths of the genial day.

She was the warmth, the essence Juhyun couldn’t get enough of, enchanted and pinned with the utmost fondness that was stitching the gaps in their inner crumping organ, their own breath bated. 

“Juhyun-ssi and Seulgi-ssi took good care of us. We have everything we need thanks to them. So please, keep an eye on them,” Seungwan paused, looking up at the leafage that whispered kind melodies as if understanding every little thing the girl had said. The sound was so distinctive, so pleasant ere it faded into the sunlight, dissolved into the flickering shadows of green tinges and greyish strokes.

_ They _ were listening.

Juhyun saw it from the way the atmosphere misted with white, and it was slightly difficult to take in the air. Unfortunately, only they could contemplate it — their perception was more sensitive to such things.

The raven opened their palm for the girl to notice, “Your parents are here now, Seungwanie.”

And before she would ask anything, Juhyun nodded and smiled at her, “Trust me.”

With a tender gasp, she nestled close to the tree, murmuring something the Velvet would not pick up. And they had no need to.

Their hand landed on the woman’s back, patting and caressing gently, the knolls of their palm absorbing the swells of her chest whenever she sighed; the shudders of her heart knocking at the surrounding walls, aiming to break free.

“Cuddle me,” Seungwan whispered when she let go of the tree and turned to the Velvet.

And she fell into their embrace; pressed herself flush against their side, an arm draped over her frame, her head lying on the raven’s shoulder with her brown locks dishevelled from the motion. A current of air kissed her crown and so did Juhyun, their lips softer than a cat’s paw. 

With all the terrifying things that Seungwan had lived through, she still found herself lucky. Yes, she had lost her parents, her house, many of her friends had disappeared — and that was hard, very hard. However, something or maybe even someone was looking after her because she was given a new family, a new home, new friends and an entirely new life. It was not cloudless all the time, yet Seungwan could not wish for more. She was grateful. Grateful for having all of this. 

For having Juhyun.

Juhyun.

_ Juhyun. _

Would she be able to extend her happiness if they left? Could she forget them and follow her own path if they set sails in a different direction? 

Juhyun was her personal sun. If they disappeared from her physical or optical horizons and remained on just a mental one, would she be capable of keeping herself warm and living? Or would she pass into the hands of sempiternal rime? To tell the truth, Seungwan had no intentions to learn that; the mere act of imagining pooped her enough. And she hoped she would never learn because they would never leave.

“Are you performing today?” Juhyun asked quietly, their fingers twirling brown hair right beneath her ear. They felt how she warped at their touch, leaning into them with each lick of their pads against her skin.

“No~”

“Then you are mine for the entire day?”

Seungwan shivered and shifted in their hold.

“Ye~”

“Sing for me, please,” The elder kissed her head and received an approving hum, whether to their request or to the caress. Or even to both. 

And the moment her voice flowed into them, Juhyun was gone.

— 

“Wannie!” 

The Velvet whispered, stepping closer to the girl as they both stopped at a local market shop. She wanted to buy some cherries. 

“Wannie!..”

They breathed out again, looking beside them, for several metres away two men were gazing at them with smirks Juhyun didn’t appreciate. 

The males draped themselves against the wall, watching the raven and talking to each other from time to time, crooked smiles never leaving their faces. Their eyeballs gleamed under the evening lights, and it seemed something unpleasant was hidden behind.

The brunette hummed, immersed in picking up the best batches of fruits she liked. These big dark red globes talked to her as if asking ‘eat me’. Seungwan didn’t realise her companion called for her until their fingers dug into her forearm, and she gasped in pain.

“ _ Wannie _ !” 

She spun to them and saw pale cheeks with tightened lips under the screaming eyes. Their grip hardened, making her grimace.

“You’re hurting me-”

“Please, let’s go...”

They turned around and their breath halted as they met the leers. 

“What’s wrong?” The woman inquired, pulling iron digits from her arm. The Velvet was shivering by this time.

“I don’t like it here… Please, let’s go,” they replied in a hushed tone.

The girl followed the look they shot again, and two unknown men grinned at her.

“Please...” Juhyun glued to her and tugged, panting.

They were terrified, she realised. Was it because of…those strangers?

“Keep the change!” Seungwan spoke to the vendor as she took the cherry-filled basket made of lotus leaves and rice straw, and hurried away.

The raven swept along the rows of shops with her hand in their icy one. She sensed that even through the layer of their glove, and her heart shrank.

“Hyun-ah,” the woman murmured once they ran into the alley leading to the House of Joy.

Her partner unhanded her and leaned into the fence, rubbing their eyes. The streetlights wobbled, and she saw dew gathered at the elder’s forehead and temples.

“Sorry… I felt…unwell,” Juhyun’s throat dried out and their voice came out croaky. They tried to even out their breath.

She wanted to come up, but they sprang from their place and moved past her without a glance.

“Hyun-”

“Sorry,” they repeated and walked, not aware of how much she craved to gather them in her arms and stay in an embrace forever.

Crickets chirred in an ensemble, serving as background music for the couple that ambled along the alley. Occasional people occurred on their path, either wending to the centre of the town or returning from it. It was a quiet evening, despite the recent vexation.

The Velvet relaxed, mainly because they used the method of counting their breaths. But also for the fact that Seungwan kept mum, not asking or saying anything. 

What had she thought about their behaviour? Had she noticed the reason for it? They wanted to know that, but… What if they saw disappointment in her eyes?

Why…did they want to be so perfect for her? No, wait… They were not perfect at all. Had never been. And after that day… They were in total odium. Even if she had said that they did not disgust her… 

“Do you…remember the night you drank with Joy?” The raven asked without turning to the brunette.

“...Not really...” The younger replied, ashamed of herself because it was for the first time she had drunk so much. Her last memory was of Haetnim biting her sock and Sooyoung throwing the bottle out of the window. “Why?”

“...Nothing.”

“Did I do…something?” She mumbled, hanging her head.

Juhyun stopped. She did as well. Both of them still could hear the cacophony of crick-cracks and rare chatter of night birds. 

“No,” they answered, studying her now. It was convenient she recalled nothing.

Her face changed; the girl looked nervous and dispirited. The same was their heart.

“Am I beastly?” They whispered, regretting this question the moment it rolled off of their tongue. “No, forget it...”

The raven waved off and sped up, irked at themselves for being such a…pantywaist around her. Yet she followed them, clutched onto their sleeve, stopping them.

“No… No, you’re not...” The woman said in a tone softer than a souffle. “I love you, Juhyun-ah... Love you despite these thoughts you have…”

Her hand slid around their arm and in a second Seungwan tenderly hugged them, warm love seeping into them, heating their insides, making them alive again. They wanted more of her.

Being careful to not hurt her, the Velvet turned around and pulled her in a proper close embrace.

Blue oranges on the snow...

She was their vitamin. Giving strength, making them happy by just breathing her in. 

They cradled her head, turned it up and looked at her shadowed face that shone so brightly they were getting blind. Her brows curved up above eyes that jumped between their pink and amethyst. Their gaze fell to her mouth, and her lips parted as she forgot to exhale.

Wouldn’t she mind..?

They shot a glance at her browns, but she kept staring at their lips. Waiting...

Juhyun’s heart ignited in an instant, forcing itself into a race when they inhaled the distance to her and melted her sweetness on their longing flesh. It was a full solar eclipse for the raven as they forgot what they should do further, yet as soon as the brunette lowered her jaw just a bit they seized her and developed the kiss. It was as if she knew how they would move because the more they captured her, the more she responded, inviting and allowing everything they wanted of her. 

She didn’t mind. 

With a soft groan, the Velvet licked her pliant folds, tickled her tongue and sank deep inside her welcoming openness, almost wolfing her down. And when she puffed, they felt insatiable. In need of more. Of  _ her _ .

Lust clouded their perception, boiled up their blood and burnt their skeleton as they pinned Seungwan against the closest fence. Her little basket dropped from her hand, several cherries scattered around the ground. She gasped and grasped the shirt over their chest once their wet mouth danced over her neck. Juhyun loved this part of her body — the best sounds were born here. Like her singing. Calling their name or...

Moaning.

They needed a reminder of that as soon as possible.

Gloved hands left her frame for a moment until returning to her, naked and touching her skin, snaking their way under her clothes. The column of her throat was so thin, so delicate, and those hollows formed above her collarbones…  _ Ah _ !.. They’d drink wine from those. Again and again. And forever.

The raven slid their pads to her nape, played with small hairs there while pressing infinite amounts of busses over her jawline, coming back to her lips. A strong fusion made them weak at the knees, the world began swinging even under their closed lids. Noises of the neighbourhood faded, and the elder heard only heavy breaths that blew up whenever lungs shrank away. 

_ Animal. _

A sudden word appeared at the back of the Velvet’s mind and they shuddered. The rotation stopped, the pounding in their chest stopped. Everything stopped.

Untamed.

Wild.

Animal.

Who was not allowed to touch the moon. They could only howl for her. Dream of her. Nothing more.

Especially such a sordid monster as Juhyun. 

They leapt away from the girl, a pillar of realisation hitting them with a force of a blade piercing the air. They…did this to her with their dirty hands and mouth… And black coveting mind.

Forbidden. She was forbidden. And they even forced her like this!

“Sorry...” The raven rasped out, guilt eating them alive. Anger bubbling under the surface, ready to emerge any given moment. “I’m so sorry, Seungwan… I...”

They were about to say ‘I didn’t want it’, but it was a lie. They wanted her. And they wanted her now, right under that fence, on the street. Like a typical animal.

“Forgive me...”

It came on the verge of tears and as the phrase reached the astounded woman Juhyun darted off, away from her and her eyes. Lips. Soft hands and luring voice.

They pretended to not hear her calling them, to not discern hurt settle between the pauses she made. They only ran. Ran somewhere they did not care.

Just further away.


	15. Chapter 15

“You have a visitor,” a woman with a bright red mouth said as she knelt at the sliding door to a cosy dim room. Her eyes fixed on the sable-haired person who sat against the wall in the most relaxed state. They turned their head and looked at her with a piercing and heavy gaze.

“I’m… no’ waiting for anybody-uh,” came the answer, followed by a soft groan as another girl rolled her hips over her guest.

“They insist,” the woman replied, biting her lips when images of the other night with this raven made her hot and wanting again.

A new moan filled the space but of a higher pitch as it belonged to the gal who clenched her arms around her client and sped up her movements, pressing herself close to the body in front. Silky hands slid further under her skirt and seized her buttocks, forcing her to go harder every time she rocked forward.

“Ah-m… busy!” Came in an angry croak and those colourful eyes shot indignation-filled flashes of lightning at the intruder near the door.

“I’ll inform them,” red flesh danced in response, and before the woman left her coworker to do the duty, she added, “Sorry for the interruption. Please, enjoy your stay.”

As soon as no one was disturbing them, the Velvet returned their attention to the young girl whose face lit with pink hues as a vocal sigh caressed her wet lips. Her small pointy breasts, supported by the waistband of her skirt, stuck out in the most prurient way and brushed against the black and purple shirt of her partner.

“Do you… h-hear it?” The raven puffed out, fingers digging into thin thighs, drawing more grunts and whines from the lass who nodded to their question and threw her head backward, cursing under her breath. “Squelching… Has anyone made you… s-oh wet before?”

“No… You’re the only… one, Bae Juhyun-nim...”

“Mhm...”

The Velvet slumped back against the wall, observing the human riding them with hooded unfocused eyes. She didn’t look or sound or feel like  _ her _ at all. Didn’t have that angelic voice to call their name the way  _ she _ did. Wasn’t innocent like _ her, _ despite a very young age and acting skills.

Because this girl was nothing like Seungwan.

And that was why the raven could fuck her with no painful thoughts — she would not get tainted with their grime and smut. They could do whatever they wanted, and she would spread her legs and open her mouth any time of the day or night — whenever they pleased. 

Yet… She was not enough. The smell was not what Juhyun needed, the flavour could not nourish them, the touch wasn’t warm like they remembered. Everything was alien, and every time they had sex,  _ she _ was before their eyes — beautiful, tempting, vulnerable and unreal. 

So unreal they cried every time her voice resonated in their altered mind.

“Talk.” The Velvet ordered, tensing more and more as they neared the release.

And so this girl did, saying things they needed to hear, to believe in. The harder she straddled them, the louder she screamed — the quieter  _ his _ words became, the fainter  _ his  _ phantom touch grew. His kisses didn’t burn their skin that much while his retching scent was slowly washing away by the many bodies they used. Just a bit more and they could return the sense of their body back into its frame; restore the connection between their inner and outer self. 

Just a bit more…

“Fuuuck!!!” The woman yelled, so desperate and wild in her harsh movements that the raven involuntarily kicked the table nearby, toppling over the bottles of liquor and several dishes; clinking and rolling over, the vessels fell onto the floor, spilling the remnants in an arcuate sweep.

Her mouth opened wide, and she convulsed with such a strength, Juhyun thought it must have been her first real orgasm since a very long time. Her fists wrenched the garment on their shoulders as she tugged it onto herself, swinging and moaning as if burning in the fire. And when she froze, clenching around them, they finished as well; a pleasant feeling spreading all over their figure in a jumping motion. 

The girl melted into her guest, smelled the fragrance of their hair while trying to put them into a tight hug, yet the Velvet shoved her away. 

“Clean me an’ the mess an’ leave,” they commanded, motioning around with their finger. They paid for sex, not cuddles. 

Though, they wouldn’t reject  _ her _ if she was here to embrace them. Her thin but strong arms always made them feel protected, covered with something more than just warmth. Would  _ she _ hold them close if they paid-

No.

She was not like these women here. Seungwan was doing everything because she wanted it. She spent time and bathed them in her attention because she liked them, not because they were one of her clients who came to admire her, court her, coax into an intimate relationship. Juhyun was not her client, and she was not behaving the way the other girls did. Right? 

Was she only doing her job? 

Of course she wasn’t! 

The raven felt their trousers being tied over their stomach, and then the gal picked up the bottles, soaking in the liquid with a cloth she pulled out of thin air.

Of course not! Wannie was special for Juhyun and vice versa. She genuinely liked them; her hands trembled whenever they neared her, her eyes — painfully beautiful and haunting — shone brighter than the moon in the darkest nights every time she looked at them. This was not similar to this fleeting impulse of affection from all the women in this damned establishment. They wanted caresses and hugs because they had the best sex in their lives and it had nothing to do with an aspiration to simply have someone in their arms, to feel the heaving chest, the cloggy heart jamming every time the breaths were shared between the two of them.

It sounded so wonderful, so sweet… The two of them... 

The Velvet sighed, an invisible line drawing itself over their cheek as they reached for a cup and gulped at the liquor; fire turning red every inch of their body.

They wanted  _ her _ . Extremely. To kiss and see her die from ecstasy in their arms. But also to exist next to her and sense her presence, watch how she turned into heavens and made Juhyun forget about the world. The latter didn’t welcome them, anyway.

“I can’t...” The raven shook their head and slid down the wall onto their side, finally alone in the room. “I’m ugly’n’broken… Monstrous, not even a proper human like her…”

Not stable, morphing under the touches of other people, fitting their preferences instead of matching  _ her _ perception. And their hunger for her… So queer, mighty, animalistic — not tantamount to her noble soul. They were the complete opposite of what she deserved, but they realised it only in her absence, for when she was around they became frenzied.

Uncontrollable. 

Their entire life was uncontrollable. As if someone and not Juhyun chose what would happen next. They found themselves somewhere, among people they often despised, stuck in problems they didn’t want to solve. The universe pushed them in the back and simply ordered to live, and they didn’t even ask for this. 

“Aigoo...”

They sighed, tired of the moths of thoughts invading their throbbing head. Being a bit swollen, their hands distanced their frame from the floor as the Velvet needed more drink; the one on the table was finished.

A groan passed darkened lips as heavy steps crossed the room, and soon pink and amethyst gazed around the lit hall, searching for anyone who could bring several bottles of alcohol. But instead of local girls, a familiar face appeared before the raven who clucked and snorted in recognition.

“Ah… It’s you,” they spoke with a brow wriggling on their forehead. Juhyun leaned into the nearest wall and focused their attention on their mate.

“Good. You still remember me,” Seulgi replied, arms over their chest. They wore mantle, and the hood hid their features under the dark shadows.

“Ugh,” the elder pinched their nose bridge, black lashes flattered for a moment before they vocalised again. “Don’bother me. I’m resting here-”

“Yes, I see. Drinking non-stop and fucking every whore under this roof.”

“Yah… What’s wrong with it? I can do whatever I please,” the shorter person answered, moving past their friend along the hall — they needed another drink urgently. 

“Are you happy?” The younger asked, following their leader a bit behind. “With what you do.”

Juhyun stopped and turned around, staring from under their brows at the annoying creature they secretly craved to hug. Accepting that yearning was difficult, though.

“I am.”

“Then why are you crying?” Seulgi closed the distance, and with a thumb, brushed off a lonely tear that treacherously ran down the hot skin of their mate.

The latter pushed the caring hand away, clinging to the wall with their own. They didn’t need this affection, this pity glimmering in the tigerish eyes. No, no… Nothing of this!

“I- I’m nn- Somethin’ got into-”

“Aha,” the taller Velvet cut off, returning their arms onto their chest. “You’re getting even better at hiding your feelings, but no matter how hard you try, I still feel you, love. Though I always wondered how you could be so exceptionally amazing in guarding your heart...”

“I do nothin’s just how I am,” flowed from the elder’s mouth as they crinkled up their nose and resumed trudging along the hall, hoping this uncomfortable conversation would end.

Seulgi huffed, “Where are you going? Come back home-”

“Ah’ve no home in this world,” Juhyun interrupted, turning around the corner and opening the door to the room where these whores stored all their alcohol and stuff. As soon as their gaze raked over the perimeter of the pantry, they opened the cabinet and took out several bottles of soju.

“You’re stealing… and not for the first time,” the taller commented, checking the hallways for any unwelcoming presence.

“I’ve paid them’uch more, they shouldn’ complain, Seul-ah,” the raven replied dismissively, going past their friend with hands full of desirable liquid. “My precious… Look at them, so shiny!”

The elder smiled lovingly to the glass vessels pressed close to their chest, then looked at their mate with bright eyes. If only there were no woes behind that unhealthy radiance... 

Seulgi managed a tight smile, yet their brows furrowed even lower into their nose.

“It’s too much, Hyun. Leave it and let’s go...”

They reached out their palm and tried to pick a bottle out of the secure hold, but their beloved was deft enough to shy away, protecting their prey.

“You know it’s never too much for us,” the shorter person reproached, adjusting their burden. “I can drink all the soju in this damned world and it won’be too much.”

“I’ll get you everything you want back at Joy’s-”

“AH!..” Juhyun sighed out in exasperation, staring down their friend. “Stop it!”

They wouldn’t return to that house where  _ she _ belonged. It was too scary, too dangerous. Even though they wanted to see and hear her like a necessity. Even though they’d die here from this yen. The raven would not return there no matter what.

“No, you stop it!” Seulgi’s tone rose just a bit as they bore a hole in the person's face in front. “Stop this… everything. It won’t lead you anywhere!”

The elder snorted; a corner of their mouth tugged to the side while their colourful orbs shimmered with menacing flickers. 

“I know. That’s exactly why’do this,” they gritted through the teeth, sent another wild stare at their friend and stomped past them to their room. They made this choice on their own and they would stick to it.

The next moment strong fingers dug into the shorter Velvet’s shoulder, making them swing on their heels and hit the wall nearby with their back. Yellow and orange burnt right above their forehead, and Juhyun felt blazing heat all over their front as Seulgi trapped them with their lissome body. Something new…

Blinking slowly, the senior examined the shadowed face, which seemed to physically glow with anger and concern and something else they couldn’t understand. The grip onto their arm was painful, and it kept them still in place.

“What are you doing?” The elder raven asked, articulating every single world in a low voice.

“You’re wrong,” came as an answer.

A smirk lined their mouth, “So what?”

The younger bit their tongue, brain working hard, trying to find suitable phrases they could throw at their mate to return them to their senses.

“You hate being wrong. And you are very much wrong right now, Bae Juhyun. Change it.”

The shorter Velvet snorted yet again, eyes travelling down to the curved lips of their friend. True, they hated being wrong, but for the first time in their life, it didn’t bother them. 

“I don’ wan’to,” they sighed out with an unimpressed expression. They would descend into this darkness until they hit the bottom. Nothing more, nothing less.

“I… miss you,” Seulgi murmured suddenly, fires in their eyes quenched and replaced with soft and doleful cotton of affection. Their hand moved from the elder’s shoulder to the side of the latter’s face, caressing most gently, tucking onyx hairs behind the perky ear. “I miss my Baechu. And I want you beside me, as we promised. I need you.”

Their voice, mellow and quiet, bellowed inside Juhyun, scuffing their numb heart, causing them to lose their attitude, while warm digits brushed aside all the sorrows they had been stashing away.

“No...” The shorter rasped out, denting into the wall behind, recent yearning to be hugged by this bear coming back with even greater force.

“Yes, my love, yes,” they stepped closer and cupped the reddened face of their leader in their palms. “I’m sorry for being so emotionally unstable, but… I miss you and can’t help it…”

With that, Seulgi pulled their mate into the tight embrace, arms cradling the heavy head while lips pressed to soft hair; favourite earthy fragrance filling the younger’s senses; darling warmth covering their being. When they said they missed Juhyun it was an underestimation.

“Come with me, love… I want to bathe with you, to eat with you… To watch the stars and hug as we always do. I can’t concentrate on any work because all I think of is you, Hyunnie. Please, return to me?”

Their soft vibrations seeped through the elder raven, resonating with the strings of the latter’s soul, awakening them, making them feel whatever they tried to drown in alcohol. They knew those words were sincere, they had been sensing that longing with all their heart, but instead of acknowledging it, Juhyun decided to numb the pain and drink.

Liquor for their mind, sex for their body. 

Two people not to think of.

Pathetic.

“I can’t go back...” The shorter Velvet cried, letting go of the bottles to anchor to their beloved. “I’m… terrible.”

“No, you’re not,” Seulgi crooned, melting into the frame of their partner.

“Yes, I am… I-I,” they paused to swallow a lump of emotions stuck in their throat. “I want her… I want’er so fucking much but I can’...”

“Why?”

“I’m bad for her…”

“Who said that?” The taller raven asked, stroking their friend’s nape.

“I-”

“Why are you bad for her?”

“...I make’er cry...”

“Why?”

“Eung?”

“Why do you make her cry?”

Juhyun sniffed, hiding their face into the crease of Seulgi’s neck. Why did they make her cry? They didn’t know for sure. Whenever they were together, she seemed to be happy, but still…

“‘cause I’m terrible,” a note of uncertainty coloured the elder’s quiet voice.

“Why?” 

They were not going to stop with this question, were they?

“I feel’ike this...” 

“You’re wrong, my love,” the younger concluded, distancing from the mate a little to look into their teary face. “You can have her if you wish and you’re not bad for her.”

“Bu’-”

“Turn your head off and listen to me,” Seulgi pressed their index finger to the temple of their friend as they spoke. “If you don’t want to make her cry, then don’t make her cry. If you want her, just say this to her, and accept whatever she would answer.”

Pink and amethyst lingered over the tigerish eyes before Juhyun knit their brows and placed their cheek over the shoulder of their beloved. Sighed, thinking over the words.

“Ah’m afraid,” they admitted almost inaudibly, fingers digging deeper into the figure they cuddled.

“Wasn’t she afraid to confess to you?”

The elder Velvet shivered and parted from Seulgi, peeking into their face.

“How do you know?”

“I urged her,” they said, and a tiny smile appeared on their lips as a rounded expression grew over Juhyun. “And now I’m urging you. Heh… You’re like two peas in a pod...”

“Wha’do you mean?”

“Seungwan likes you, my love. And she waits for you. The question is whether you like her back.”

“It… doesn’ matter… I’m no’ right for’er,” the shorter Velvet puffed, shoving a bottle — surprisingly unbroken — with their foot.

“Maybe she doesn’t need the right person. Maybe she just needs you. Like  _ I _ need  _ you _ , the way you are — snotty or all smiles, savage or affectionate. So far you are still you.”

The elder stared at their mate with a new portion of tears ready to be born. Their heart beat so fast and hard, almost the same way it had done on that ceremony night. Seulgi cupped their blushing face again, planted a tender kiss onto their forehead.

“Why… are you like this?” Juhyun asked, unexpectedly shy and full of deep feelings towards this creature in front. 

The taller smiled, “I’ve realised I’m not telling you enough of how I feel. You may sense it but not understand the real meaning behind, so… I’m going to be like this more often.” They drew a curve under the pink eye with their thumb, wiping teardrops away. “Besides, it’s so fun to see you flustered.”

“Yah...” The elder mouthed, pretending to scold, yet the way their figure curled into their dear screamed they were more than pleased. 

“No one ‘yahs’ at me, you know… Didn’t you miss doing this as well?”

“Ah did,” came out with a hushed snort.

“Then come back home and ‘yah’ at me as much as you want?”

“No-h,” they shook their head and tightened the hug. “Bu’ stay with me tonigh’... Let’s have a bath an’ everything...”

“Mhm… Several minutes ago you asked not to bother you-”

“No, bother me,” Juhyun murmured, basking in the warmth of Seulgi’s arms like a cat in the rays of the sun.

This was what they needed the most — loving hands and caring attention, physical connection to someone who would not affect them in any way but express fondness; wise, kind words that would settle down in their heart and produce light. 

Because descending into the pit of the darkness was better with something that could illuminate the path.

“Ah lob’you,” the shorter mumbled, rubbing their nose against the collar of their friend as if trying to find the most comfortable position to merge into them.

“Ehe,” their fingers raked through the black tresses before they pressed their mouth to that tipsy head, saying, “Love you, too, Baechu-ah...”

— 

Their skin, matte and silky, seemed to absorb every little pressure applied carelessly to it as numerous bruises showed their ugly tints on its surface. So far Seulgi could remember, it hadn’t been this way before. 

With intense caution, the younger slid their hand over Juhyun’s shoulder and collarbone, tracing several dark spots with their fingers. Was their mate asking or seeking for those engaging in ruder intercourses, or was it simply their body’s negative response to an excessive amount of intimacy? The elder used to  _ leave _ marks, not  _ receive _ ones. Besides, their skin became much paler, and it was dreadfully easy to irritate it.

“This… does not look good, Hyun-ah,” the taller raven whispered somewhere above the other one whose back rested against their front as the two of them lay in a rectangular wooden bathtub. “You’re not sleeping enough… Have you been eating at all? You look like a skeleton...”

Juhyun shifted in their mate’s arms, moving the latter’s palm from their collarbone to the stomach.

“I’m fine,” they echoed, caressing the wrist in their hold.

“Gaunt is not a definition of fine.”

“Tsk.”

“They’ve been wild on you. Why are you not stopping them? It must have hurt...” The younger continued, examining the midriff of their friend that wore another set of purple blots and scratches. “Do they have claws for nails, huh?!”

“Yah, Seulgi-ah… It’ll fade, no needdo react-”

“These whores are all out of control, aren’t they? No respect for their client whatsoever. And they even get paid!”

“Why are you so triggered, eung? I’m fine with th-”

“I don’t like you marked.”

“Categorical.”

“And don’t want you hurt.”

Quiet and unostentatious sounds of water hitting the slopes of the bathtub filled the small room as its guests fell mum. Steam made farewell to the cradle, flying high into the hollowness and wrapping limpen figures with its kisses.

“I need it… now,” Juhyun brought their partner’s fingers to their mouth, touching them with every movement of their lips. “I want them to wash… h-him… off. I-”

They paused, cutting themselves off, and Seulgi used this moment to tug them closer, sploshing around. 

“He mus’ die. I can’t sleep while he’s awake,” was rasped out after a while, and the shorter Velvet balled up, pulling their knees to the chest; the other body accompanying their movements to keep the cuddles tight.

Only the heavy breathing of the younger served as a silence-breaker while the whirlpools of their minds consumed both ravens.

“And so he will. As painfully as he deserves,” they gritted through the pearls of white, clutching a smaller fist in their palm. “I’ve almost found him… Just a bit more and I’ll bring you there to seal his fate.”

In response, Juhyun hummed; an oversubtle nod of their head following their verbal confirmation several moments later. Seulgi had never failed them, and this time they wouldn’t either.  _ He _ would bite the dust and become the food for those exact worms he once had threatened to feed. It was just a matter of time.

“You’ve done it as a woman here,” the taller began after a while in an attempt to change the direction of the thoughts. They combed the other’s hair with their fingers, observing thick locks undulating in the water. “Right?”

“Because they’re all women here.”

“What about men?”

“For now, I don’ wan’to try.”

“Okay.”

“Was it that strong?” Juhyun asked and carefully turned around, clasping their mate with all four limbs.

“Mhm… I couldn’t stand up when it had flowed over me and I collapsed. Yerimie was shocked. Poor girl, she’s around every time I’m overpowered by feelings,” they chuckled, closed their eyes as their beloved messed with their fringe.

“It grew quite long...”

“Ne~”

“How did you explain it to her?”

“Just said you were having sex, what else?”

“Yah! She’s still a child!” The elder flamed, somewhat abashed.

“Joy was one year younger when she slid onto your dick,” came back from Seulgi, and that very second they received a slap to their shoulder.

“Yours was not far behind, by the way… And she is not Joy.”

“But grown enough to take part in such discussions,” the raven retorted, yet seeing their mate’s mouth opening, quickly added, “She lives and works in  _ that _ house! With  _ Joy _ herself! I’m pretty sure she knows much more than we can imagine.”

“Seungwan won’ like this,” the shake of their head accompanied their broody voice.

“Isn’t she a dark horse herself?”

“I… don’ know yet.”

“Yet,” Seulgi smirked.

“ _ Yet _ ,” another Velvet repeated in an annoyed tone, rolling their eyes.

“So, you’re planning to study that?”

“I’ve no plans… I just want her, that’s all,” the elder slumped, observing their hands under the water with a troubled face. “I like’er, but sometimes I think it’s only sex I seek. Ever since we’ve done it… I’m like an addict, always in need of more. Preposterous.”

“Where do you learn these words, Hyun?!”

“AH!” They sighed, grasping the air between the two as if choking someone. It made the taller raven chortle.

“Okay, well… I can’t blame you. Or anyone. She’s a sex kitten. Have you seen how men look at her? And she knows of it!”

“Oh yes, she does,” Juhyun reaffirmed, recalling their last conversations with that girl.

“Is this a problem?”

“Yes. She gave me her heart and I’m just… there to fuck.”

“I don’t think so.”

“What?”

“Even if, then fuck her. What’s the problem?”

The elder straightened their spine and stared their vis-à-vis dead in the eye. They were not getting it.

“That’s not right,” their voice sounded unsure as they tried to see more behind that sharp yellowish gaze. The owner of it shrugged, looking away for a split second.

“Why? Because you’ve fallen for her? Or because you’re afraid she’ll abandon you once you open up to her?”

Thousands of knives pinned Juhyun’s heart to their chest, causing them to lose their breath, their guard to the deepest feelings, fears, desires. They jerked away from the person in front, their insecurities ordering them to escape.

“Or both?” Seulgi continued, grabbing their mate’s wrists to keep them in place. “Getting sex is easy for you — just either pay or beckon with a finger, and they are already in your bed. But with her, it’s somehow becoming complicated. Why? Because she’s given you her heart? You’ve been given lots. Is hers special? Why? Maybe because your own heart craves for her? But you’re suppressing it since you’re scared she’ll leave you?”

“Stop it-” They tried to let themselves free, but their beloved transformed into the powerful bear that tolerated no objections.

“She won’t wait forever, you’ve seen her. She can get anyone, but guess what? She wants you, and you’re avoiding her, and that’s why she cries, Hyun. Because you keep her on a leash, yet not saying what you need from her. If it’s really just sex, fuck her as long as you wish. Will she reject you? I don’t think so. No one has ever done. But,” they made a pause to take more air into their lungs, “but if it’s more than sex, then go and find out what it is. Yes, she can leave, but also stay, yet to learn it, you need to let her in. 

“Don’t hide because you’ve been hurt, love. Do what you want, what you feel like doing and see if people want the same. If not, then they are not for you. Besides, you always have me, I’ll be by your side literally forever, you’ll get tired one day. Do you remember: ‘Sometimes you’ve got to be bold to rock the world’? I tell this myself every time I wake up, I’m doing it right now and you should, too.”

“Enough,” Juhyun inserted in a stern tone while Seulgi took a break. “I’ve got it. So, enough.”

“NO! I can’t fight this world alone. I need someone with me, and if you’re falling down, it’s my responsibility to pull you up. Not only because I’ve promised — I want it; want  _ you  _ next to me. Yes, I’m that selfish,” the younger fired out, their grip weakening on the other’s flesh. “Actually, no, I don’t want to fight anymore. I want to settle, create things, eat delicious food and just live. Happily, freely, with no attachments to anybody. And if someone joins me, I want them to be like you...”

“You’ll go bananas from two Juhyuns,” the elder noted in a softened voice, taking a turn to pacify their agitated friend with gentle strokes of their fingers against the latter’s forearms. It appeared Seulgi had been hiding their own troubles exactly the same way...

“I won’t. I’ll be glad because you’re the best person I’ve met in my entire life… And I want you to be happy because your happiness is my happiness. Your pain is my pain and I hate pain. I’m selfish, that’s why you must be happy all the time. I failed this time, but I’ll be a better mate from now on. You shouldn’t suffer, and I’ll do everything to end this suffering. Just... don’t avoid me...”

“Look at me,” the shorter Velvet requested, peeking into the teary face of their partner. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I left you alone with all those feelings. I was so absorbed into my own misery I forgo-”

“It’s not what I m-”

“Sh! I’m talking,” they hissed, yet not angrily. Having cupped Seulgi’s head into their palms, they continued, “You’re not selfish, you’re... totally right about everything… But I- Look at me. I can’t… handle things… now-”

“I’ll bbbutcher him down!” They erupted. It was nearing hysterics at this point, and Juhyun tried to allay themselves to affect and ease the state of their mate.

“I know, I know, my dear, shhh… No need to cry,” the shorter raven placed feathery kisses over their friend’s eyes. “I’m sorry for running away from you… I still find it hard to open up, don’t know how to do it properly...”

“Just come and ask for something, there’s nothing bad in this… I’ll be ha-appy if you do it because it means you trust me enough, and I’ll kill for you, just... tell me what you need, I’ll do everything.”

“I... know,” Juhyun sighed, wiping salty rains away with their fingers. “I’ll try.”

“I am supposed to make you... ca-alm and decisive, but instead I’m so-o-obbing,” they snivelled while falling into the comforting embrace with tender pats to their back.

“Aigoo… Aigoo... You did well, dear… That was quite a motivational speech, must admit… Since when do you give those, eung?”

“Yerimie is teaching music to some children out...side work, and I’ve done painting… several times and resulted… telling those kids how to live diligently… I’m not a perfect example but those faces look so bright after our talks,” the Velvet replied, relaxing under the caress of their Baechu. 

“So, I’m one of your stray tots?”

“Yes,” they nodded and felt Juhyun smile. They had lied — smiling Juhyun was better than snotty, crying Juhyun...

“How bold of you.”

“Sometimes you’ve got to be...”

Right. The two of them had learned this phrase at a very young age and it stuck to them, served as a leitmotif throughout their lives. ‘Be bold, never be afraid of anything, do what you want to do and be compassionate to yourself’. When had they started doing a complete opposite of this? When had they forgotten about themselves, about their own soul that sought love? Self-love, self-care, self-respect… 

Living like a puppet, ruled by this world, by circumstances, situations and even people — was not what Juhyun hoped for. The illusion of control was their last buoy, yet when it was destroyed nothing left. Only darkness and emptiness they were currently sinking into.

They were neither the first, nor the last to get into this pit of sorrow. But doing nothing while going down was yet again letting something else rule their life. 

Maybe it was time to stop this circle of limpness and become desperate to live the way they wanted. All in all, they have already reached that bottom...

“Th- Hm… Thank you… for everything,” came out in the tiniest sound.

“Heh,” Seulgi wreathed the elder in their bone-crushing hug. The weight was lifted from their chest and they felt so much better now, they could fly. “Will you come back home?”

“I’ll... think about it.”

“Promise?”

“I do...”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, let me know what I need to improve in my writing! I will be very grateful


	16. Chapter 16

Boring. Everything was getting boring with each rotation of the Moon around the Earth: drinking, sex, girls’ attention…

Juhyun sighed; chin over their hand, elbow on the table cluttered with alcohol, food and whores. It has been the nth day since they saw Seulgi and life couldn’t get duller. They had somehow changed, and staying at this place served no reason any more. No satisfaction, no relaxation (neither physical nor psychological), no interest at all, as if they absorbed everything this house of sin had to provide.

Should they return to Joy’s? Their mate was there, waiting for them with respect for their choice. Entertainment of higher quality was provided at that establishment and the girls…

The raven gazed over the bunch of gals gathered around them. Two of them clung to their sides, brushing against them in the most suggestive way, causing them to be morphed but with no excitement. Another two talked to them and if several days ago such a conversation would have gained their attention, today it would not. 

With a free hand, the Velvet picked up their glass and sipped on the soju that tasted so bland it brought no pleasure. Even drinking water seemed more delightful. Such an absurdity.

“Bae Juhyun-nim!” The fifth girl called as she entered the room with a black shawl in her palm. When had she gotten out?

“Hmm?” They replied, lazy eyes traveling to her approaching frame. The other women shifted their stares to her as well.

“Let’s play a game!” She exclaimed with too much enthusiasm to their liking. Her browns shimmered under the lighting while red lips wore an enigmatic smile, creating dimples on her pretty face. The raven liked her the most here. She even could sing…

“Why?” They asked, tongue heavy and rebellious in their mouth. For some reason, those two leeches to their figure got all thrilled.

“To tickle you pink. It’ll be fun, hon.”

“Ai’no mood for games.”

The lovely girl pouted, knelt at the table and bent over to appear closer to her client.

“Please?” She begged with an appealing expression that always helped her in such situations. “Please, my little honey bunny, you’ll like it!”

“Ugh...” Such familiarity from her was a bit annoying, yet something in her voice piqued the Velvet’s curiosity. All in all, they were bored and if this game came to be as good as they had been promised, they would give it a try. “Okay.”

With a cheery shrill, the woman jumped from her place and waved her hand, going to the furthest corner of the room. 

“Come, dear, come here,” her tempting tone filled the space as she waited for Juhyun to shed their drags and sweep their legs to her.

“What’s the game?” They asked, towering over her small frame as if trying to overwhelm her with their presence. Their brain, quite pickled and unsteady, launched them in a gyre, forcing them to place a hand over the wall — at least that insipid water kept its intoxicating attribute intact.

Trapped between the barriers, the Pretty gave them a coy smirk, “This one’s for later.”

No thoughts crossed the Velvet’s mind at her attempt, so even their uncontrollable brows stayed unimpressed and dead above their forehead. They sent her a piercing look.

“Hide and seek,” she tweeted, raising the cloth with her hand up. “It’s hide and seek.”

“Are you foolin’ me’round?” Juhyun did not expect it to be a child’s game. 

Sensing herself being close to defeat, the girl hurried to reassure her client, “It’ll be fun, sweety. And with a little twist in the end.”

“Wha’twist?”

“You will find out,” she teased, placing the shawl as a blindfold over the raven’s eyes. “Can you see?”

“Ugh… No,” they answered, their head performing a swinging show for them. 

“Good,” her fingers slid over their face and neck before she slipped from the corner, leaving them alone. “No talking, ladies. You can move, but don’t leave the room. Only use simple noises for attraction. Bae Juhyun-nim, you may start counting now.”

With that, the place flooded with swishing sounds, indicating the women running around in search of places to ‘hide’. The chamber was quite large, yet it lacked furniture that was actually useful for this type of game. Maybe, because of that, the girls were allowed to change their positions. So, it was more ‘run and catch’ rather than anything else.

“Doesn’ matter,” the raven mumbled to themselves and started to count. Whatever these whores were up to, they’d find out. For fuck’s sake, they paid for everything and should be amused. “Ah’m startin’...”

Everyone hushed and stopped breathing and, at that very moment, the Velvet turned around and listened. They didn’t remember the exact furnishings or their positions in the area, but the biggest and most used ones they managed to reinstall in their imagination. 

“You need to find a special girl here,” the Pretty informed them suddenly.

She was to their left, somewhere near the door.

“Wha’do you mean?” They asked, making wobbly steps toward the supposed centre of the room.

“She wears a velvet choker and you have three opportunities.”

“What? How’m I… Yah!” Juhyun stamped the floor in frustration. That was not how the game should be played; these harlots made up rules on the go! “Why’m I doin’ this at all...”

The focus of their attention sky-rocketed and spread all over the room as they listened. There had to be something special about the girl they had to find, but if five women were against them, it would be better to eliminate two of them and then concentrate on finding  _ her _ . In addition, if the raven was lucky enough, they’d catch their target within these two tries.

Someone moved, and they jumped in that direction, ears perked to their maximum, every sense sharpened as if they were in battle. One of the gals stood close, they sort of felt that with their skin, but they had no idea where exactly.

“Ksks,” another woman called, but Juhyun didn’t move. If she was trying to distract them from their current prey, she failed. 

Yet they turned just a tad towards the sound, waiting for any further action. And they got it when the nearest girl tip-toed past them. 

Like a snake catches its dinner, the Velvet leapt to their right, bumping into the first whore and clasping her in their arms. She squeaked, but her body instantly relaxed in their hold; she was used to this. 

Their palms slid all the way from her waist to her neck, and when they realised she had no necklace, their heart clenched in irritation. They were taking this way too seriously.

“Miss,” she whispered, soft and pliable in their arms, then pulled their head down and kissed them with unmitigated thirst; a taste of sweet fruit over her lips.

They could understand these people’s personal desire for their body, but did they actually love sex that much to live like this? Did they have no choice? 

Strange, the raven thought, that such questions popped up in their mind. They had never pondered over the reasons for such establishments to exist. Sex was everywhere, so why create houses of games? Why do it for money? 

Did Juhyun think of sex so easily because they indeed could get it in the blink of an eye? They were of the Velvets, they had a reputation, history following them. It was their curse and benefit. But normal people? What made them create such systems where one would pay and the other would give sex? 

Because it was quicker and easier?

What the fuck?

Juhyun winced and parted from the woman, pushing her aside. Odd ideas bred in their head, causing a gnawing pain to arise. They wanted to win, the sooner, the better. That’s all. They would win, find out the twist, and go home. 

So tiresome…

“Ah!” They sighed, giving a slight massage to their scalp. “Make it harder.”

They were drunk but still managed to catch the prey within the first two minutes. It would be boring if things didn’t change.

What was said, was done. It took them around ten long but thrilling minutes to find and check the second girl. No choker, though. 

However, only three women were left in the room. And one of them was their prize. How could they distinguish her amongst the others?

“Make another type of noise,” Juhyun ordered. It would be better for everyone here if they win. With this headache, they were not in a mood anymore. “Good girl.”

_ She _ rustled her skirt while others used the nearby objects. Had she changed her clothes? That sound was different from the swishing garments of her coworkers. 

It was a perfect test of the Velvet’s attention to details, at least. They had spent so many days doing nothing that they had forgotten how to concentrate and use their brain. But now it was working on the verge of its power, and they realised how much their sight affected the way they interacted with the world.

They should listen and feel more instead of just looking at things. 

Jump.

A girl snicked behind them and, as they tried to trap her in the other part of the room, they ran into the drawer that stood somewhere across from the door. 

An alarming grin painted itself on Juhyun’s face as they made several steps back to the centre. The one who was alone behind them had no choker as her skirt sounded familiar and she had a rose fragrance coming off her. She had been sitting beside them at the table.

Now, one of the other two was their target. Which one? The women fell so silent it seemed they had left the chamber. Most probably they stood along the walls. No one would hide in the open, right?

The raven angled to the right side, careful and attentive. The Rose was isolated, the first two belonged here no more, and those seemed to be the ones who had been talking to them the entire evening. So the first Leech and the Choker girl were somewhere within their reach. Did the Pretty serve as their goal? It would make sense since she had initiated the game. And she wouldn’t allow the other female to take her main role.

All right. The riddle was solved, now it was time to play. With determined strides, Juhyun crossed the room, almost coming to the corner where everything had started yet instead of going straight, they turned left and bounded after the person who did not expect her guest to come her way. 

Not her, the Velvet understood, running after their current prey. It was okay, though. Because now they had only one woman on their side. 

They stopped, but only for a second as they moved back, crouching. It felt like a part of their job where they had to locate the target and spy on it or follow or trap it somewhere. Except for this time they couldn’t see and killing was not the case.

_ She  _ was not moving. They smirked to themselves. It was fun, they should admit. They liked hunting people. For various reasons. 

Juhyun walked along the wall, touching it with a hand, slowly approaching the right corner. She was hiding somewhere here; they knew it. What furniture rested in this place? They didn’t remember. A cupboard? A chest? Both? 

Fuck that.

Again, cutting to their left, the raven hit the narrow table, and the bottles jumped out from their spots, crashing against the floor, covering it with their contents. 

Not here? She should be; they felt her presence. Almost heard her breathing.

“Com’ere!” They roared when someone brushed past them, drawing a curve, stirring the air.

Not bothering about any other furnishings, the Velvet dashed after the soft steps indicating a very small and light creature was escaping them. She really was trying hard not to get into their arms, but Juhyun would not be Juhyun if they let themselves fail. And so they darted again, their fingers entering her clothes but only for a moment as she arched to the side and opted to make them disoriented by circling around.

Stubborn little cocotte! Made them trip, yet now they took aim at her. She was straight ahead of them, flying over the floor in hopes to hide again. 

Not today.

With that, the raven scrambled and sprang forward, knocking the woman down. She groaned, made an effort to shuffle out, but the hunter was already over her, triumphant and complacent.

They turned her on her back and pinned her wrists to the floor above her head. Anger and pleasure combined inside them as they readjusted their pose to secure her stay under them.

Her gown was indeed different from the others. The fabric on the sleeves was of greater quality, Juhyun knew it as they had been using tailor services for many years and they had learnt many useful things about the craft. 

They expected her to say something but that moan was the only sound she allowed herself to let out. Interesting. It could be she’d talk once they check on her neck.

Silky hands slid down her arms, rested a second or two over her bosom and glided up to the thin column dressed in a soft ribbon — the proof of their win.

“Got’er!” The hunter exclaimed, releasing their target and towering over her, head high and proud. “Wha’ the twi-”

Wait a minute.

What was that?

Citrus?

Lemon?

...Orange?

Faster than producing a strike, Juhyun returned their palms to the girl’s neck. Bent to her, pressing their covered temple to the side of her head. Breathed in.

Impossible.

They went crazy. Hallucinating again? Could be. It had happened so many times they were getting used to visions.

But  _ this…  _ She smelled like  _ her. _

Son Seungwan.

The woman whose name tickled their mouth when pronounced.

Surreal.

What the…

This girl shifted under them. Put her hands over their head and moved it just enough to capture their lips with hers. They had been kissed so many times today; yesterday; the days before. But  _ this _ touch was different — hungry and delicate all the same. Soft… Like her…

...tongue that knocked at the entrance of their mouth, eager to find more; wipe all sense of reality away from them. 

And they let her, guided by the invisible power  _ she  _ held over them, over their mind and body. 

The scent of blue oranges grew stronger with each second they spent in this woman’s embrace. And so did their desire, it piled over every cell of their being.

It was Seungwan.

No, it wasn’t.

As if two people fought within them; a battlefield where one craved to take off the blindfold and see while another wished to be blind till the end of their life. 

Kissing her forever.

Touching her forever.

Her hands travelled to their own that stayed tight over her throat. Her heart beat so fast under their skin… It was  _ her _ , the rhythm betrayed her.

It was her.

Her.

Why? Why was she there, playing these games, laying under them, smelling so good, so tempting, parting her lips wide for them to reign? 

‘Just take’er,’ their mind ordered, and there was no one to tell them not to.

It didn’t matter. She  _ was  _ there and nothing else mattered.

Be it a hallucination, a dream, a nightmare… They would accept everything as long as she was there.

Juhyun broke their kiss, placed her wrists back to the floor, and slid their fingers in her palms to intertwine with hers. She was a perfect fit for them — the curves of her hands matched their own, forming an unbreakable lock between them. 

A deep sigh left her lungs when the raven forced themselves between her legs and put their head over her breasts, their ear close enough to hear her wild organ beating itself down. They missed this — her feverish pulse breaking its music under their caress. They missed these responses to the slightest acts of motion they slammed upon her. Like she would die if she didn’t react.

Seungwan… The Velvet didn’t need eyes to see how beautiful she was; her high cheekbones — the elevation for the gentlest kisses, her wet mouth — an oasis for the sweltering ones, her finest neck — a field to be planted with nibbles and pecks. Her hair — she had it tied up today, and they needed it between their fingers, so they picked her up and undid her brown locks, streams of light around her irradiant face. 

Juhyun re-discovered her flesh under her shirt, felt her skin against their fingertips, showered her collarbones with the tiniest smooches. They wanted to extend this moment as they tried to imprint every swell of her body in their brain, but this woman was impatient.

Her hands slipped under the elder’s garment and over their shoulders. Hadn’t she felt they never morphed for her? The effects of those local girls had been long gone, and they remained in their original form despite her touch.

Maybe not seeing how she would react to their natural physique was a blessing as the raven let her free them from their shirt. They stilled above her frame, waiting for something they didn’t know. 

No human had ever seen them like this. No human had ever kissed their bare skin in this state. She was the first. 

_ Would be the last. _

“I love you.”

Seungwan’s voice filled their ears, touched their heart, settled in their soul while her lips traced broken lines across their neck. She was gentle, too gentle. She had obviously seen the bruises left by others. All of them together were nothing like her.

“Love me,” she purred, drawing the elder into her rising passion, helping them uncover her from the rest of her clothes.

Too many ‘whys’ swamped their brain. Why was she so unreserved? Why did she rise and fall under them in such demand; lead their hand to her blazing core as if unable to endure them?

Why was she so ready and they couldn’t morph for her?

“I want you, Juhyun,” she breathed out, keeping her lover’s face in her hold. Was she watching them? What did she see?

Had she noticed the bottomless need for her? The eternal light she ignited within them? Had she discerned how lost they were because of her?

They bowed, connected their forehead to hers, drawing her features under their eyelids from the memory while their fingers dipped in her before entering in their full length.

A soft sigh burnt their mouth and her arms seized them like never before. As if she had never hugged them, had never perished under them. Or like she never would. 

No.

‘Take her, make her yours, only yours,’ spoke their mind, causing fear to rise somewhere in them. How could they do this? How could they deprive her of her freedom? Of choosing with whom to stay and be? 

‘She belongs to you. Kill her if she fails you. Kill,’ the voice kept going as they thrust faster, biting her under the ear. Why wasn’t she vocal?

Why wasn’t she singing for them, calling, begging? Why?

Were they not enough for her? Did she need something else? 

A man?

“She can’t have any ‘cause she’s yours,” another seething thought filled their inner space, making them harsh and turning their heart black.

With a grunt, Juhyun arched back and grabbed her neck with a free hand, continuing to please her down there where she desired them most. “Just fuck her,” they recalled their mate’s words. 

‘However you want.’

They tightened their fist around her flesh, a velvet string rubbing and irritating them to the point they wanted to rip it off her skin. 

Seungwan.

She swayed, rolled her hips, dug her nails into their forearm but produced no sounds other than sighs and gasps. And they wanted,  _ needed _ her to say their name the way she always did. No one could do it like her.

_ Clutch tighter _ …

Did she say that? Could it be she wanted them to go rough on her? Because they were not enough? Not worthy of her? 

Her.

She wanted everything for her.

They would give her everything.

The raven clasped their fingers, sensing her muscles tense in their hold, her whole body going stiff while her digits induced painful holes on their arm. The girl wrapped her legs around their waist, sensitive and demanding but also alarmed and confused.

She smelled  _ so  _ fucking good they craved to eat her, swallow her down like a glass of soju. Thus her taste would never leave them, and they’d enjoy it for the rest of their life.

Just a bit more… Harder and faster. Like this, under this angle, over this spot…

“...Hyun,” Seungwan forced out as she tried to pull their hand away; her tender fingers jittered, scratched, pinched them, but they couldn’t feel pain anymore.

They couldn’t because  _ she _ was their only pain, their aching wound, an open injury disturbing them day and night, forbidding to exist.

“...hyun...” The woman called, and suddenly the blindfold was snatched from their head.

Could they see her now? Could they watch her again? Wouldn’t she disappear if they did it? Wouldn’t she transform into the other girl they’d despise?

“...uh-hyun,” her throat vibrated and her hand stroked their cheek as if reassuring them she would stay, would be there for them. 

“Wannie...” The Velvet husked out and squinted their eyes open, looking for the only one they wished to see.

And  _ she _ was there: all dewy, flushed, with an opened mouth and peeking teeth that usually formed the brightest smiles for them. Her dark eyes, slightly unfocused, stuck to the elder’s face, her pleading expression sparking a firestorm in their chest.

Oh, what was she doing to them…

Bewitched, Juhyun removed their hands from her frame yet only for a moment as they covered her with their body, giving her the hottest kiss ever. The dizziness returned, both from the intimacy and alcohol in their blood. But Seungwan was stronger.

So much stronger that when she grasped them in her arms, their bones cracked. Suddenly, they couldn’t breathe, their body felt numb as throbbing pain enveloped them in their very intestines. They wanted to cry, but they had no power left to do it.

He was too vigorous, and the raven felt becoming a child again — weak, defenceless and lone.

A hearty roar of laughter bubbled from the person keeping them imprisoned, those previously soft hands growing bulky and muscular and hard, constricting not only the Velvet’s movements but also their mind.

No.

With exertion that led to tears splashing from their reddened eyes, Juhyun wriggled away from the rocky frame, falling backwards, crawling further, praying for someone to save them. Why was it happening again? Why were they trapped with him again? What did they do to deserve such iteration? Were they truly cursed or was it their destiny? 

“Why me?” The Velvet wheezed, turning on their stomach and dragging themselves along the floor.

“Because you’re a monster, an animal,” the Giant growled, grabbing them by the leg and pulling them onto himself. “I’ll fuck you till you die.”

And then he forced the raven on their back, straddling them, reaching his cruel hands for them.

No.

‘Fight. Die fighting but don’t let’im have you,’ a childlike voice howled inside, mixing with a woman’s wail and a man’s scream.

“No one loves you,” the Giant hissed, spitting venom over them and making their skin burn. His tongue looked like the one of a snake, and his face morphed and shifted as he licked his lips. “She’s disgusted by you, you ugly undeveloped piece of shit… And your mate… is forced… Nobody would love to have you by their side… Except me.”

“No,” Juhyun hit the creature above them, slapped away his arms, wrestled against his grinning maw.

“Yessss…  _ I  _ will have you.”

His mouth gaped open, saliva flowing out with such force, it created a pool on the Velvet’s chest, etching it, turning their skin black and red from the blood that boiled and frothed all over the incipient hole. Affected, the raven brushed their palms over the wound as if trying to cover it, wipe off the poison, save their heart from imminent danger of being destroyed. But instead, the flesh on their fingers melted, pointy bones festering fast with gusts of smoke rising above. It smelled terrible, inducing them to retch. 

“You’ll be my favourite toy, my little monster, stained, broken, just mine,” the Giant continued and took out a dagger from behind his back. “I’ll carve my name over your velvet skin.”

Juhyun didn’t even blink but somehow failed to notice how his hand moved to their stomach, the blade piercing it, drawing thick liquid from between the hack. A shock of hurt spasmed their lower body, and hysterical, the raven twitched, grasping the weapon with their rotting limbs, forcing it away from the man’s hold. They flailed at him, their own blood spurting everywhere, obscuring their vision and ability to think as blots continued to hound them to death.

_ No. _

Seulgi loved them. Not because of their appearance or silky touch, not for their skills to give pleasure, not for their cover. Seulgi loved them because… they merely did. Just because they could, because they felt it. Seulgi had no reasons to love them, but still, they did. And Juhyun loved them back.

Nobody forced no one in their relationship. It was the purest connection ever, and no human would make it foul.

“Ffffuck off,” Juhyun fizzled as they wafted away from the Giant, yet the blade just moved through his frame with no consequences for him. 

He guffawed, coughing more of his dark essence over the tiny person underneath.

“What about her? Do you think she loves you for who you are? You’re a murderer, a cold-hearted bastard who fucks every moving thing, a scared animal-”

“No!”

“Oh yessss,” his face appeared right before their wet eyes. “You are the worst thing that could happen to her, you know it. She doesn’t like you, nor does she love your spoiled soul. She’s there for sex as everyone else. She’ll use you as her-”

“ _ No! _ ” Juhyun cried, tears streaming down, clogging their ears and throat, causing them to gasp and sigh and sob because they  _ felt _ that as if it was physical.

“You don’t know it for sure, do you? You don’t know her. You don’t know who you are for her. You know nothing,” he spat with such anger that his jaws heated up, scorching the Velvet down.

No. Seungwan was not like that. She was pure and sincere all the time. She never hurt them, never caused any troubles, never made them feel unwelcomed. She was modest, kind, funny, caring, warm and possessed every good attribute a person could have. She was beautiful and not only on the outside like the raven, no… Seungwan had that inner beauty that shone through her bright eyes and captivated everyone who happened to look at her.

“Taeyeon was also like this,” his voice added to their thoughts. “But when she was done playing with you, when she got bored, she left you. And your precious Wannie will do, too. You’ll never see her again… or return to her.”

Oh no…

Juhyun couldn’t take it, couldn’t agree to it. They wouldn’t live through one more heartbreak. 

“You can have me, though. I will never leave you,” the Giant said and a black halo exploded around him, stretching its numerous hideous arms out to the Velvet. 

“I don’t want you!!!” The raven screamed and shoved the man away, trailed themselves through the room and hurtled outside.

They had to get home, see their beloved Seulgi, ask to save them from this monster that followed them everywhere; ask about Wannie because they were lost. They didn’t understand, but it was all they wanted to do… 

As cool air hit the Velvet’s face, they hurried to the exit from this haunted place. A person blocked their way and made them shriek in panic as a snake-like mug took place on the stranger’s head. They hustled him to the side, almost falling from the force they had used, and scampered along the dark street.

The night was so murky, it was difficult to see where their legs led them. Their lungs hurt so much that every inhale was followed by the sounds of their throat tearing itself apart. Juhyun’s feet, previously covered in white socks, now looked like coals smouldering with every step. Their fingers clung to the dagger, and sensations of decaying flesh still lingered on their bones. 

A group of people materialised before the raven once they had turned around the corner of a street block and ran onto the main street with lights on it. They bumped into humans, fell, lost their weapon, but instantly picked it up with a scrape. The men and women looked at them with a mixture of surprise, distaste and concern, yet they had no time to dwell on that — getting home was a priority, otherwise, the Giant would catch them again.

It felt like they were running from Death who was whispering in their ears. How many times had they encountered Her? How many times had they escaped Her? Could it be their last chance to evade Her before they finally rest in peace? Not that they believed in peace after their transition. Life was merciless, why would Death be milder?

Juhyun stumbled over a stone, sank onto the dusty ground, rolling over themselves with burning sensations spreading along their arms and naked back. They coughed, laid still for a while, looking at the starry sky and silently crying over the pain that dominated their heart. Should they give up? Just one clear cut and they were done. It wouldn’t take much.

A sudden explosion nearby made them jump. They turned their head and saw a black cloud floating over them with thousands of shaking and wriggling arms. Blood streamed down the mess, turning into snakes once on the ground. 

_ He _ was coming.

“Please!” The Velvet mouthed attempting to get up but invisible waters pinned them down, preventing them from taking a breath. “Nno...”

They were drowning. The taste of salt filled their mouth, going up through their nose, causing a fit of hysterical coughing that lacerated their rib cage. The hole in their chest started to grow again, clawing deeper and closer to their heart. 

They’d experienced this already; it had happened many days ago but this time it was more dreadful. And the raven did not remember how they managed to stay alive at that time. Somebody had to help them. 

But they all were at home. And Juhyun wasn’t yet. They had to swim, to get onto the ground again and charge anew.

_ Just fucking stand up! _

... _ stand up! _

‘Just stand the fuck up!’ A child’s voice repeated in their head, a powerful blow to their guts propelling them.

Unsteady legs were ready to sprint while the rotating mind calculated their destination. Home. They were heading home.

Where was their home once again? 

The Velvet felt an icy hand over their shoulder, then another one, and another one. 

_ Quicker! _

They lurched forward, knees bending, arms anchoring to air and imaginable pillars they were creating in their brain.

Juhyun heard a flicker of the snake’s tongue somewhere close behind and jumped, feet barely above the ground as they neared the familiar gates that had just been opened. 

Several laughing men stepped out and a few local girls escorted them out, smiling and waving goodbye. The evening was closed and all the guests were leaving.

The raven saw nothing except for the entrance and they rushed to the doors, pushing through the people serving as a counterforce to them. Why were they in their way? Were they on the Giant’s side as well?

“Hey!” Someone yelled at the Velvet and shoved them away. “Are ye crazy or what? Go the fuck outa here! They’re closed!”

No! Snakes were nigh, their venom was bubbling louder!

Juhyun got up and more people emerged from the gates, meaning the path was more or less free. They made one more attempt at bursting inside the yard, but another pack of humans flowed outside. And they  _ had _ to get inside.

Using elbows and shoulders, the raven bulled their way through the bodies, but when they crossed the border and reached the inner space, someone caught and rammed them into the fence.

_ Oh! _

It was not painful at all — how the blade slid into their side up to the hilt.

Many voices resounded around them as they slumped against the wooden wall, hitting the ground with a hollow sound. Right… They were empty after all, and their heart would shrink away very soon.

Not knowing what to do with their hands, Juhyun just swayed them over the grip to their dagger. Blood started to trickle down the cut, colouring their already painted body with additional tints.

Why were people screaming? They should have been gone by this time. Why were they circling them? 

The Giant must have ordered them! The raven bumped their head against the fence as they lay limp against it with their back, then blinked away the fog, looking around. 

They knew nobody here. Seulgi was not present. Had they mixed everything up? Was it the wrong home?

A new wave of tears gushed from between their heavy lids and a quiet moan touched their lips as they realised they had to repeat everything again to find their true home.

Did they still have time for that?

No…

_“Unnie!” A girl ran into a_ _cosy room where another woman was undressing. The latter sent her a confused gaze. “It’s Bae Juhyun-nim, unnie,” she said in a dying voice as the face in front fell and lost all its hues._

_ Not bothering about her clothes’ state, the older swept out from her room and followed her coworker. Her heart saw no pauses between its pulses as her mind flew far ahead _ .

And it stopped once she discerned her beloved among people who gathered around but did not help. And no one could because every time someone tried to approach Juhyun, they cried and swung their dagger.

Seungwan’s knees bent when she broke into the circle, seeing in what state the raven was: blood covered their mouth and jaw, stained their hands and arms, leaked through the gaping wound at their naked abdomen… 

Why…were they stripped? Bruised so much there was no space for clear skin? 

Fear and pain washed over her, choking and oppressing, depriving her of strength she needed to stay on her feet. 

The elder was like a frightened animal in the corner — their wide black eyes shimmered under the street lights, moving from person to person with a certain type of horror that Seungwan could not fathom the existence of; their outstretched arm trembled with such a force, she heard their muscles whine at how hard they clung onto the weapon, and their heavy breathing crepitated through the night as if they were close to death itself.

Sickness assaulted the girl’s shivering form with its mighty gusts, plunging her into fire and ice one after another. She needed to move, but her body forgot how.

“Juhyun...” She breathed out, and soft arms appeared around her shoulders — Yerim seized her.

“Don’t come, they’re attacking, unnie,” the youngest pleaded, understanding perfectly well her sister would not listen to her. Judging by the looks, Seungwan lay alongside the Velvet in the same state.

“Juhyun!” Came out louder as she lurched to them.

“NO!” They yelled, aiming their blade onto the figure that had gotten closer. Their other hand swayed to the side as they tried to get a hold of the fence to pick themselves up. “Don’touch me!!!”

The woman froze and her heart dropped under that wild stare she received from the raven. 

“Please, Juhyun-ah,” she began in a constricted voice that threatened to break every second. “Put it down… It’s me...”

Uncontrolled, they jerked, twitched their legs as if trying to run away, to force themselves deeper into the wall behind. 

“I don’ want you! Fuck off, don’touch me!” They wagged their hand, and as a man attempted to approach them from the side, they menaced him as well. “I hate you’ll never have me!”

_ Only I can love such a monster like you… Look, even Seulgi is not here… _

“No!” Juhyun shook their head, smudging the tears with their free palm as the Giant grew bigger in front of them and his black snake-like arms were reaching for them from all the angles. “The’re comin’...”

_ No one’s coming, you’re alone here, with me… _

“Seungwan!” Joy yelped when the elder woman fell backwards after the Velvet swung their weapon at her.

“Make them leave!” She shot at Sooyoung. “They’re frightening  _ them! _ ”

_ We’re here to  _ “...love you…”

“I don’ wan’ your love...” The raven wheezed as dark clouds touched their feet and they felt extremely cold... 

_ Whose love you want? Hers? Look at her! She’s undressed like she was having fun with someone. She’s a whore like everyone else you fuck! _

“She’s not...”

_ But you like whores, don’t you? Being a whore yourself, whining so sweetly under me… _

The Giant’s face flowed to Juhyun and was mere inches away, a strong smell of burnt flesh enfolding them. His blaring rotten teeth peeked from his mouth as he grinned and licked his bloody lips, staring at the Velvet with an unblinking gaze.

“You… never have me again,” they whispered and placed the blade at their own throat.

“Unnie why!?” Yerim sobbed, clinging to Joy, hiding her face in the other’s clothes. She did not understand what was going on, why they behaved like this, why they were doing this to themselves. 

It seemed they heard nothing Seungwan was telling them, like someone else was speaking to them instead of her, and all her words went past their ears.

The girls tried to pack the guests off, but some refused to go. Probably, they would have helped and disarmed Juhyun, but now it was almost impossible.

It was too much.

“Hyun,” Seungwan called after she stiffened a cry as extreme dread creeped onto her once the knife touched that neck. “Please, Hyun, look at me… I’m right here...”

Their eyes watched but did not really see, as if being hazed, glassed with an alternative dimension. How could she break it, how could she get behind it if every time she made a move the Velvet pressed harder? They were whispering things now as in delirium, talking to somebody who was not present.

_ You’re not going to kill yourself. Seulgi will die as well. _

“They’ll forgive me. Understand me...”

_ What about them? Her?  _ The Giant spread his arms and several people shone through the black fog.  _ She’s crying for you, and you’re going to kill yourself before her very eyes. A true monster. _

“You’re plain’ with me… They’re no’ real,” Juhyun croaked, looking at blurred faces in the distance.

_ They’re as real as I am… Listen how fast her heart beats, how hard she’s trembling from fear… I can hear her bones shaking and blood freezing… SO beautiful… Maybe I can take her instead of you? Since you’re going to die- _

“Don’!”

A blazing roar rolled in the air as snakes hissed in laughter, spitting all over the ground. 

_ Now I think I actually should… You’re expressing so much more will to live for her than for yourself… _

“You… don’ want me to die,” a revelation came to the raven as they looked at the Giant dead in the eye.

_ Of course, I do. But not before I fuck you. To death. Make you mine. Corrupt you... _

“Fuck off… You’ll never ‘ave me. Never.”

_ WH-WHat are you doing? _

Juhyun’s lips stretched as their hand moved a bit further to the side of their throat. No one could harm them if they died. It was not that scary, to be honest. They would just transition to another life. It could be a better one and they’d meet Seulgi again, in one form or another.

_ You’ll die! _

They pressed the knife tighter to their skin. They’d die. No fear was stronger than fear of Death. And She was the most unwelcomed in this world. Even more unwelcomed than Juhyun. Soft, warm and loving, Death saw nothing but the true spirit of the dead. She was genuine, she judged not. There was no reason to be scared of Her. Or anything else.

“I’m not afraid of you any more,” the raven whispered with a crooked weak smile and angled the blade, inhaling one last time. They were free from Him. And they would be free from all the burdens of their current life. 

“PLEASE!”

“I’m sorry...”

_ “I LOVE YOU!!!” _

“I love you, too…”


	17. Chapter 17

“I HATE THEM! I HATE THEM!!!”

Seungwan winced at the desperate yell that hit her ears and lifted a cup of water to her lips with a trembling hand. 

“WHY?! Why did they do it? Why did they do this to you? Why are you like this? Why?! I don’t understand, unnie!”

Yerim was quivering as huge tears streamed down her puffed face. Her fists were clenched so hard it hurt, but it was nothing compared to how she felt inside. 

She and her sister stood in their room late in the evening as the latter had come to change her clothes.

“Don’t say such things, Yerim-ah...” The older woman sighed out, closing her eyes, for they burnt with too much pain she was trying to subdue. She hadn’t slept for several days, her head was clouded and she was nearing the state of getting unconscious. But she just needed to change her dress and go back…

“You’re KILLING yourself and I… I can’t take it… I don’t understand… Why? WHY?!” She howled with all her body tightening, curving inside as she drew in a prolonged heart-shattering sob. “WHY do they make you cry all the time?! WHY do you LET them?!”

“Yerim-ah...”

“WHY are you defending them?! They’re  _ wrong _ ! It’s not  _ right!!! _ ” She cried, and her throat hurt as if mauled.

“I know,” Seungwan whispered, leaning against the chest of drawers once she approached it. Fresh night garb was somewhere there, but she couldn’t remember where.

“Then WHY?!!” Her sister’s reply seemed to cause an even stronger rush of anger within the younger. “Why are you sleeping there? Why are you tending to them when they should have just DIED!?”

The older woman shivered, grabbed onto the wooden furniture and applied all her willpower to wash away the horrible thoughts and images that had flowed into her mind.

“I wish they were DEAD!!!” Yeri’s voice roared hysterically, and she collapsed on the floor, weeping and drowning in unstoppable tears. Her core bled from fear and pain and grief along with the realisation of how hard her words affected her sister because Seungwan squeaked, lost connection with her legs and fell to her knees, still clinging to the chest of drawers. The most dreadful visions returned with suffocating power in her brain, and again she replayed, rewound, relived the terror of that night when she had almost lost Juhyun. The heart of her life. 

She had seen them cutting along their neck, heard an air-rending shrill escaping her lungs, and if Seulgi had never made it on time, Seungwan would have witnessed a sepulture of her entire existence. 

She was a coward, an abominable spawn of sinful pusillanimity because she had done nothing to save, to prevent them from inflicting harm, to pacify and return them to reality. She had been too scared, too worried about her own well-being instead of rushing toward them with a clear intention to stop them. And as a result, she had almost lost them.

Yerim was in the arms of fright right there, bawling like a child that had been left alone in the dark of night. She was afraid of death, of losing someone she had gotten attached to, of dealing with feelings of despair again and seeing her closest person whom she loved with all her soul lose the will to live. The elder woman understood all of that, nevertheless, her younger’s words cut through her akin to millions of spears thrown with frigid violence.

Juhyun. Her Juhyun had been asleep for days now. Haunted by the nightmares and hallucinations whenever they woke up, they could not restore their powers, which they needed considering severe exhaustion of their body and mind. Sleep deprivation, alcohol, starving, poor water consumption and excessive physical activity had led to lingering obfuscation of senses with lamentable ramifications. 

One day when sanity knocked back into them, the raven could not remember what had been happening in their life, how they had returned to Joy’s; they could not comprehend why people were so perturbed around them. They even didn’t know about the cuts to their neck and abdomen. And the Velvet had no time to learn anything of that because the moment of peaceful consciousness had turned into a fresh wave of delirium in the blink of an eye. 

The other midnight they tried suffocating Seungwan, who had previously rebuffed to leave them alone and decided to stay with them day and night. She had failed to avert the misery in which they had fallen, and hence she wanted to at least restore them to reality. But it appeared to be a punishing task. That night she almost got strangled, and if it weren’t for the lack of Juhyun’s strength, her soul would have kissed the heavens.

And then Yerim had broken down. It was her apogee right now. She had been there as well when the blade sank into the flesh and purpled from the blood. Some things just wouldn’t empty the memory that easily.

“They never should have found us! We… We never should have met at all!!! I wish we were strangers… I… I wish...” The younger wailed, tears dripping onto the floor as she hunched over. The last time she cried so much was for mourning her parents. But they had died, and Juhyun… “I hate…  _ Hate _ them...”

She hated them because Seungwan was a living dead. Because she spent hours,  _ days _ in self-flagellation, reproaching herself for something Yerim couldn’t understand. Again.

It was happening again because the last time Juhyun had been sick, Seungwan behaved the same way — as if it all was her fault. As if she was the reason for the raven’s misery, but how was it possible if her unnie was the kindest and purest person on this planet? On the contrary, the Velvet had arrived here and if at first Seungwan was blinded by her strange love making her happy, the more she spent time with them the more she began to cry.

And this was not how life worked in Yerimie’s tiny world, this was not how it should be.  _ This _ was false. Damaged. And she didn’t want to live a wicked life, didn’t want it for her sister either because  _ she _ was her only support and her only hope; the one who encouraged her, approved and nurtured. The one who long ago had made Yerim believe she was a true sibling and not just an offspring of slaves who should have ended the same as her parents. That’s why she hated the raven — they were the reason for her beloved unnie’s suffering.

“Forgive me,” the elder brunette croaked as she closed her eyes and stooped against the furniture, resting her forehead over her hands. The air was heavy, filling the lungs with dragging emptiness after every breath. She had to return because Juhyun was alone for too long already. “Forgive me, little turtle, but I can’t… go the other way. I am dying without them...”

“They’re  _ killing _ you!!!”

“Don’t say such things,” Seungwan’s feeble voice sank onto the floor, shattering and dissolving like smoke in the skies. It wasn’t like that. Nothing was what it seemed to be. “They need me...”

“They need NO ONE! Even themselves!!!” She screeched from the bottom of her gut, falling into a new loop of emotional vulnerability. 

“Then I need them,” the elder added inaudibly, getting herself up and resuming her clothes search. Her little girl was crying her heart out but she could do nothing for her since she didn’t know what to do; since her mind did not belong to her now. 

Having discovered what she was looking for, the woman tugged it close to her chest and turned to leave. Seeing Yerim crushed ripped her soul, but the former was healthy, protected and overall content contrary to Juhyun, who couldn’t even sleep without being tortured. 

“Unnie!..”

Seungwan might regret her decisions one day, but at this moment they felt right. And at this moment, she was choosing her lover over her sister.

“Please, forgive me,” she whispered, meeting the imploring look of her younger one before stepping out of their room. 

Coldness met her with a snarl, biting on her cheeks and hands. Even summer turned its back on them, gifting dullness with winds and rains. Or maybe it tried to wash and sweep the ache of this place away, Seungwan didn’t know. She didn’t care because her only concern tossed about in bed and required attention.

She fought Seulgi for the right to care for them this time. The younger had promised to be there for Juhyun, to ease their fever, collect all the broken pieces of their heart and put them back together. She’d promised it to herself and to the taller Velvet who had saved her from self-destruction because she would have followed the ravens into the graves if destiny had requested differently. The brunette was not simply in love — she was under its heel.

Her legs were cast iron as she hauled herself to the guest house. She needed rest, good sleep and calm silence for every moment now was filled with distress, anguish and constant fear of losing them forever. 

Candles bowed to her when she entered the Velvet’s room and quietly closed the door. She put her clothes at the corner where she stored her belongings and came to Juhyun, who lay on their back with hands gripping tightly onto the blanket. Their lips were parted and brows knitted together as quick breaths mingled with puny moans, causing sweaty drops to gather over their pale skin. They were under attack yet again, and Seungwan picked up a piece of cloth from the small basin with cold water standing next to the bedding. She drained it and patted the raven’s forehead and temples, pressed it to their neck, producing long light strokes. Their lashes trembled as eyes moved under the lids and curved shadows danced over their cheeks. Juhyun was the most beautiful being the brunette had seen, and even in this miserable state, they remained divine, establishing a usual rapid heartbeat in the woman’s chest. How could she love them so much? How could she develop even stronger feelings for them under all the circumstances? She had been watching them, studying their features for several days already, plastering their image in her inner vision, yet she couldn’t get enough of them. She had been dreaming about times when they would recover and a healthy tint would appear on their face, and their pink with amethyst would shine on her again. Maybe they’d even kiss her with those full moist lips that now cried for water and peace. 

As the girl returned the cloth to its place, she cradled the elder’s head, gently caressing them with the pads of her fingers. They tended to calm down whenever she was doing it, and this time she succeeded once again — the Velvet’s muscles relaxed and their breathing slowed, becoming steadier. Her palm slid to the wound on the side of their throat and she evaded touching it as memories jumped into her mind like fleas onto the stray dog. She wanted to remember only one thing from that night — Juhyun’s last words they had stated in what seemed to be such a clear mind that Seungwan believed they were sincere. And addressed to her. She had met their gaze before they did a cut and it was so pure, so soft, so undisturbed by the fears it looked like they came back to reality just to answer her plea and say goodbye. ‘I love you, too’ resounded in the brunette’s entire frame, and she stiffened a cry, locking it away in her chest as she bent lower and placed a tender kiss over the raven’s brow. If only they had said it in another situation…

“Please, come to me,” the woman whispered with her thumbs drawing lines and arches across the resting face, making all the tension in it disappear. “And tell me you love me.”

Her consciousness went awry as tiredness pressed harder and plucked the strings of her mind. She had to sleep at least for several hours while her love was serene. And so she let go of the precious features, moved to change into her night shift before curling herself next to the Velvet. Their defined profile captivated her, and she gawped, hugging herself under another blanket in an attempt to warm up. She needed them to recover so she would bathe in their heat and melt in their arms; love them with even greater diligence and devotion. Until they had no reasons to run away from her… Until they found solace… 

Hard teeth sank into her neck as an arm and a leg wrapped around her frame from behind. The girl shivered, startled by unexpected touches, and her heart burst into a nervous competition while her mind ventured into lucidity, providing more details to whatever was happening to her. The obscurity of the room seeped into the woman, for all the candles had already burnt down, indicating a new morning would knock at the doors soon. So she had been sleeping for the entire night until this exact moment when Juhyun turned precipitous and incongruous. Was it her other tribulation?

Seungwan’s body twitched as the raven’s hand slid over her breasts with such fervour she wondered if her lover was actually sane and not in mere semblance. Without hurt this time, their mouth clasped over her skin, sucking onto it while the busy palm kneaded her flesh hidden by the thin fabric of her clothing.

“Ju-hyun-ah,” she half-whispered, swatting away their unsuitable caress to only meet a more determined assault. “Please, stop...”

Within a second the Velvet’s lips abandoned the arc of her neck and their fingers froze onto her waist as instead of leaving the brunette alone, they moved closer to her, pressing their front tight against her spine with such eagerness she had to steady herself with an arm since she swung forward onto her belly.

“Stop, Juhyun-ah,” she demanded, wincing under the lick to her earlobe, followed by heavy breathing lapping over the baby hairs on her nape. The elder’s grip grew stronger, and with their knee, they pushed her upper leg ahead, forcing her to tilt onto her stomach. “Juhyun!”

They couldn’t hear, feeling about the woman’s figure, gliding their hand to her thigh under her dress, groping and digging into, while once again they smooched all the open areas of her shoulders. She realised they wouldn’t listen and resisted them by evading their mouth or wafting aside their palm, releasing herself from their crushing intimacy.

Yet the raven couldn’t accept such a turn of action and so they growled, propped themselves up and by her arm moved the girl round on her back with wrists suddenly trapped, legs parted by an alien limb and a heaving chest pressed down to her bosom. 

Not fully asleep, neither awake, it seemed they were living a dream but with their physical form acting out its part in real life, or they arose from the night’s repose with their mind playing trumpery deception on them. Either way, Juhyun got mauled by their senses and guided by wicked voices.

“Oh please, stop,” Seungwan begged with a sigh as the Velvet’s contour loomed over her before it lowered and she felt a heavy head fall next to hers; soft silky tresses tickled her neck along with the hot humid air that flowed from her lover’s parted lips. 

With no effort of will, the brunette twisted her hands free from the broken chains and put them around the elder’s head, stroking them as she would do to a sleeping cat. For some reason she wanted to cry, her eyes swelled with emotions and she wouldn’t prevent those from spilling out. 

Her sweetheart mewled and jerked, and she embraced them tighter, purring their name and brushing through their hair. A burning sensation tinged the spot they had bitten. Were they having a dream about some girl? Someone who enjoyed them being rougher? Juhyun had never done such a thing to her, so it might have been another person in their dream.

No. It didn’t matter. They were free, they could have anyone they wanted, and they had made no commitment to her. So why was Seungwan’s chest clotted with a stifling wrench? Why did she feel betrayed, forgotten, abandoned? 

Probably because they came to other women instead of her? She knew they spent nights and days in a brothel; gossips spread across like a plague. They could have gone to her or Joy, but they preferred whores, and the brunette didn’t understand why. What turned the Velvet away from her? They had been so gentle and passionate the last time they kissed her before leaving her alone and confused in the middle of the dark street...

Carefully, the younger moved the sleeping body from herself and placed the raven back on their bedding, covering them with the blanket and tucking it around. She slipped under hers once again and stared at the black ceiling as tears flowed across her temples.

So many questions buzzed in her tired mind, and managing them was nearly impossible as with no end they gyrated, duplicated, mingled and transformed into new abominations.

Did they need her, really? What if Yerimie was right? What if they needed no one at all? They had Seulgi, and that might be enough for their heart. Whereas for their body they could find anyone they preferred. Did Seungwan think she was special? Why would she be? Just because she was in love with them and had confessed to them? Even Joy had questioned this reasoning. Was there any sound motive for the Velvet to wish for her?

All the time it was her who craved them like they were oxygen. She was ready to die for them, and when they tried throttling her, it didn’t even scare her as much as it should have. All her attention narrowed down to fit only Juhyun, and when they were not around, the brunette became moody; the sun didn’t exist without the Velvet. Despite being good with pretending, the longer her raven was away from her, the more Seungwan was becoming obsessed. Was it normal? Was it how love worked? 

What if she herself was the reason for them to alienate her? What if she was too much for them? 

Did she remind them of the rape?

Had Seungwan become unattractive?

Who was she for them?

And Juhyun for her?

...Juhyun?

The sound of rain was the first thing the woman’s senses registered as she woke up and lightly stretched herself. The drops rapped comforting music against the rooftop of the hanok, inviting to listen, to get up and come out for a gulp of fresh air. Today the wet wasn’t vexing, and the girl quietly moaned, propping herself into a sitting position. The room was relatively lit from the outside through the paper windows, and Seungwan felt well and rested for the first time after all these days. Except for that unexpected moment at night, Juhyun didn’t fall victim to nightmares, and she hoped they got at least as much of good sleep as possible.

When she turned around to check on them, she saw vacuity. Her head swung to one side of the chamber, to the other, yet the Velvet was nowhere to be seen. A sharp sting in her centre shot a wave of worry overkill over her frame, and she jumped to her feet, hastening to open the door.

The raven had not walked during the past days, thankfully, but if they did today, they could have gone anywhere. Or could not, since they lacked strength. At least this thought helped the brunette gather herself — panic was ready to creep into her at any given moment.

Freshness met Seungwan first, followed by the wall of rain starting at the end of the roof she was under. And only then she saw them — standing still in the middle of the yard with their face lifted. Their white clothes seemed to gloom amidst the greyness of the surroundings, while their black locks were swept backwards like a brush.

“Hyun...” A quiet call escaped the younger’s throat as she discerned they were barefoot. How long had they been standing there for? How long had she been oblivious to their absence?

The woman groaned and grimaced as she ran downstairs, and cold water poured onto her blanket-warmed frame. Streams of liquid dripped over her eyes, her body shivered with her nightdress sticking to it with unpleasant heaviness. Her feet slapped against the soaked ground as she hurried to her lover and stood in front of them with a crazy heart beating the wits out of her.

Juhyun was transparent with tints of blue on their lips, their figure quivered with strong and frequent shakes and their face was emotionless, blank, iced with impenetrable nothingness. Seungwan wanted to call them, but her tongue glued to the palate, and she just stared at them, expecting, begging and hoping.

Their sharp jaw lowered, water flowed across their brows, over their high nose and pursed mouth. Oh, how much she needed them to be sane, to not sleepwalk and not be affected by hallucinations!

And so they were — those pink and amethyst, uncovered by agglutinated lashes, looked dull and straight at her, and no veil covered their vision; almost the same way when they had said they loved her.

To keep the eye contact was strange and a tad difficult. It stirred millions of feelings inside the young woman while she pored over Juhyun’s face, and they gazed back at her with immanent profundity. They parted their lips to emit a soft, soundless sigh, and only then the brunette noticed steam coming along with breathing. A line of water drops trickled down their upper lip before they tightened their mouth again, their attention sliding down the younger’s face to her neck where it stopped.

Seungwan forgot she was cold and soaked to the bones when the Velvet’s expression blossomed forth with new complexity. They seemed to study something, and she recalled them biting her several hours ago. Did they remember? What were they thinking now?

Unexpectedly, shame started rising within and with a hand she covered the mark, ceasing their scrutiny. Their brows furrowed in response as they met her eyes, and she sensed a weak and apologetic smile touching the corners of her lips. They had nothing to worry or ponder about. She would bear such minor inconveniences with no second thought.

Lightning blinked over the couple and soon the reverberating thunder rolled across the sombre skies, startling the girl, causing her to gasp and shrink into herself. And Juhyun…

Juhyun, as if kicked, tumbled down onto their knees, and their head hung in a rout. Raindrops froze amidst the air when their arms clasped Seungwan’s figure and they drew her closer, hiding their face in her waist and sending severe quakes from their body to hers.

And then they cried; with no tears for the rain overshadowed them, with no strength as they had lost it, but with vocal sobs that snaked deep into the woman’s soul and plucked all the chords together, precipitating her into the gulf of their burning pain. They clung to her as if she was slipping away from them, their feverish movements and gasps left no space in her lungs for air. She inhaled torture and exhaled stitches as  _ her world _ wept their soul out to her, and for the first time in her life, she experienced that much sorrow in one little being. Juhyun was howling away all the wounds they had gained during their life, and the woman had never imagined they contained so many of those. It was ripping her heart apart; she became paralysed, unaware of what to do or whether she had to do anything at all. 

Without realisation, her hands fell softly onto the Velvet’s head, stroking the onyx locks sticking to her trembling fingers. Her nails dug into and scraped their scalp with calculated tenderness in response to every strong sob coming out of their mouth they buried inside the creases of her nightdress.

Seungwan knew nothing about their pain — she knew nothing about the raven’s past at all. But it felt like she came through all the hardships they had — her heart resonated with theirs so much that tears showered down her face in automatic response.

“I’m sorry,” she squeezed out with what seemed to be all her power, but her voice might not have even reached Juhyun’s ears, dying amidst the noises of the rain. 

The brunette cradled them tighter, sensing their fingers growing stronger around her waist, and right at that moment she wished her words, whispered only for them, sounded louder than all the thunders in the world,

“I will always love you, Juhyun.”

***

_ Seungwan _ ...

She was back to her room again as they had asked her to leave them for some time. Their memories returned, although with not all the puzzles in place, yet the gist of what had happened to them was clear. They knew how much pain they had brought, how they had affected the girl and her living, and the only way they could care for her in return was to show her they were doing better so she would tend to herself. Sending her away was a dismal necessity — Juhyun felt extreme guilt and worry for her since she looked nothing like they remembered. She needed to mend.

And so she did. When both of them were stable enough they started meeting again: eating together from time to time, walking around the park, talking about random things and every second of her presence was healing as if her smile and gaze were the cure to all the wounds on their heart. Except for the one that gnawed at them under the realisation that Juhyun was the cause of her wound. 

Seungwan seemed to understand that as well since she started to change. They couldn’t see what was different in her, but her entire approach to them moved to another level. She was more wholesome, even though the time she spent with them was lessened and she redirected herself into Yerimie and her work. The Velvet knew it was right. Besides, they had to sort out their feelings after all that had happened.

And lots of things had happened within their inner universe. Many fears had died after they had surrendered to Death herself and yielded up to let Her take them; they had cried out all the blackened parts of their heart later, and now it felt like they were starting a new life. Suddenly, Seulgi’s words and reassurance were not something untenable but a sense-making way to Juhyun’s identity. Suddenly, even the imagined Giant’s speech made the raven realise they had been too scared to let themselves live the way they wanted. In lieu of being a victim to the world, in place of allowing people to affect their vision of themselves, they finally decided to try to do as they believed was the best for their soul. 

And if the Velvet knew what path they had to take to achieve the harmony inside, the only thing that remained uncertain was their relationship with Seungwan. Gratitude and guilt, appreciation and shame transformed and added to yen that couldn’t be contented.

It filled Juhyun with dismay. They didn’t understand what they wanted the woman for. And while they were struggling to see whether it was just sexual attraction or something else, the brunette behaved as the sweetest flower. She catered for their every need, showered them in her warmth and gentleness, not realising how butterflies erupted within the Velvet when she was close to them.

She wasn’t playing with them the way she had used to, wasn’t asking them to kiss her any more. She wasn’t murmuring to take her, to have her, to taste her. Even her teasing, whenever it happened, was innocent; she was not flirting with Juhyun how they would like her to.

It was getting under their skin even despite their understanding she might need time for that. They had damaged her too much, after all.

However, at one point they began caressing her more, embracing her tighter, cooing to her, both trying to probe her attitude and studying their feelings. It seemed the woman was just allowing them things; like she was condescending in some sort of way. 

Juhyun realised they returned to the very beginning. Yet again her ghost haunted them, and this time it was more difficult to control themselves. 

Seungwan was a mystery. Was she as any other girl, Juhyun would have seduced her and morphed as a result. But she was like no one, and they had no clue whether she was interested in them any more.

For that purpose, they tried putting a move on her for several times but ended up burning with desire for her as if she mirrored their attempts and they affected themselves instead. Juhyun was voluptuously hexing her with all their heart, and she pilfered it, muddling their brains and playing havoc among their thoughts. They had never been so miserable at their coaxing. And she had never been so heedless of it. 

Even right now, when the two of them sat on the porch in front of the elder’s room listening to the sound of the evening wind — she seemed deaf to them. They were alone, all the guests stayed either in their rooms or went out, and the weather was so perfect, so romantic, the ropes of attraction wrapped around the raven drawing them closer to the woman, who hummed a melody they had never heard before. 

“Is this a new song?” They asked and slid a palm over the girl’s hand that rested on her lap as she leaned against the wall. 

“Yes, Yerimie’s recent creation. We’re going to make a performance for it,” Seungwan spoke softly, not minding the touch of the velvety lips to her fingers.

“I forgot the last time I attended any,” Juhyun purred against her skin, nibbling at her knuckles one after the other, yet she was still not looking at them. And they couldn’t see that unique gaze she would send them once in need for their further caress.

“We’ll have many more.”

“I hope so...” Came out in a mere sigh as the elder pressed her palm to their cheek, closed their eyes and listened. To their heartbeat, to the stop in her humming, to the sudden creak of wood somewhere behind. “I’m sorry.”

Her head turned to them and the rays of warmth penetrated their frame as her brown pools held them while her hands comforted their agonised essence.

“It’s not your fault,” she began, but they shook their ‘no’, kissing the rise of her thumb before returning her hand to its previous place. 

“Don’t let me make you sad,” the raven added and captured her eyes with theirs.

They didn’t want to see her in such a terrible state she had been in days ago. She shouldn’t cry because of them and their unpredictable actions, which even they couldn’t reign over.

“I’m not sad,” the brunette whispered with a brief smile on her, and tucked a lock of sable hair behind the Velvet’s ear, opening the side of their face to her touch.

“What is it then?”

“It’s nothing,” she replied, her gentle pads traced along Juhyun’s jaw and paused over their mouth. “I am not sad with you.”

This was the exact moment when the tables turned and the elder became the victim of desire they tried so hard to lay on her. The throbbing of their entire chest, the weakness in their limbs, the only light of her eyes — everything played against them in this game. And they hated losing.

“Kiss me, please,” they heard themselves saying in a constricted voice. As if already defeated.

Her expression never wavered, yet her gaze became kinder, veiled with sparkles of affection people had for their pets when those cry for attention and love. 

And the raven obediently waited, crushed by the strength of emotions they slithered into, losing breath and forgetting themselves. Was it their body wishing for her, or did they desire Seungwan for their heart?

Granted, Juhyun needed intimacy with her like it was part and parcel of their being, akin to light that came with the sun. However, was it because they were simply horny for her? They had lots of men and women, but nobody had ever affected them as much as this girl did. Could it be the source for their yearning lay in her heart? All in all, every time she kissed them she did it with her soul and not only lips like many others, her every caress extended from her centre and not just her frame. It was genuineness the elder was craving for; affection only Seungwan could provide; love. 

_ Her  _ love.

Like they felt Seulgi with their core, they wanted to feel Seungwan six ways from Sunday, for they were soaking her in, drinking her brightness, sucking up colours of life she provided, and it was all they looked for.

“Please,” the raven repeated, blinded by her close presence to the point of everything out of their focus turning black.

If the moon touching the surface of the water somewhere in a deep forest often seemed to be an unreal observation, for the Velvet, the girl’s mouth pressed lightly to theirs felt almost fictitious. Simple and tender, the buss turned into a blessing; as if skies visited the elder and gifted them their exquisite curio.

When she parted from them and her warm eyes glistened over the tinted cheeks, an explosion happened to Juhyun’s lungs. They puffed, going down too fast, unable to grasp reality and drowning in the sweet aroma of blue oranges on the snow. Something beautiful caught their attention behind those browns that seemed to behold the spirit of Love herself, and at that very moment, the gates to their heart opened with a loud swing, crashing against the guarding walls and making them shatter into milliards of wisps. The light, the heat, the depth of this woman’s soul crushed through the defences the Velvet had unconsciously installed many years ago, and now even the black corners of their gnarled centre were illumined by her, causing them to wince in ache as tears formed a spate on their lids.

“Hyun...” Seungwan called in a whisper amidst the tremble she couldn’t suffocate, and the instant a lone drop fell down her face the raven cupped her head and wiped the waters off, dissociating into atoms with every second passing under her gaze.

“Wannie,” they echoed, realising she also felt the energy flowing between the two of them. They saw her embarrassment and confusion for not understanding her tears, and they sent her a comforting smile, stroking her down. 

Were they to choose the brightest moment of their life, they would choose this one. Because being able to touch her heart with theirs was everything they could dream of. Because finally letting themselves open up for her was their greatest fulfilment. And feeling connected without being mated was going beyond everything they could have ever imagined.

Sex was wonderful, but what they were having right now was much better. And if they were forced to pick the only thing they could experience with Seungwan, Juhyun would pick staying in this alternate state forever because this was truly what they desired and searched for.

Such a fool. An imbecile they were for seeking comfort among the whores. What had those given to them? A headache, bruises, fatigue and a fleeting sense of enjoyment. What Seungwan would have offered them? Love, care, fondness, demure behaviour neighbouring with saucy outbursts. She was janiform in a way she could give them everything they needed, be it sexual or spiritual satisfaction.

They simply coveted her warmth and concentrated attention, a flutter of her eyelashes and an inspiring peek of white pearls from between her lips. They required so little, yet so much. 

“Seungwan,” the raven rasped out as they turned their head to brush her palm on their face with their lips, placing tender kisses, storing away the lines and wrinkles of her skin and the feeling of her touch on their flesh. 

“I… I should go...” She sighed out with unplanned nervousness, nearly gasping at the Velvet’s increased caress.

They saw no explanation behind her sudden wish to break this unique moment. However, despite their need, they wouldn’t push her to stay. Not her, not after everything she had been through because of them. They would wait for another time, for an alternative possibility when they both would be ready for each other and for whatever would happen between them.

At the end of the day, she wasn’t disgusted with them. Juhyun hadn’t been able to realise it earlier because they had been too scared of an answer. But today’s kiss clarified everything to them.

To boot,  _ they _ were not disgusted with themselves anymore, too. Deep inside they had accepted that part of them that was wild and untamed, that erupted out of the blue and burnt the world around to the ground. It was their inherent attribute that made them who they were and to live harmoniously with themselves they had to accept it to work with it, to modify it and learn how to control it. 

Besides, their Seulgi was right once again. The elder Velvet could do whatever they wanted, and if people were not seeking the same thing, it was a sign to either part with those or to look for new approaches. 

With Seungwan, Juhyun would like to try differently. They only needed her approval — whenever she would be ready.

“Thank you for being with me,” the raven whispered, pressing lips to her pads one last time and releasing her right after.

“...I’m...” The woman struggled to find words, and as the elder looked at her with a heavy gaze, her attempts ceased. 

“Go now,” they sighed out, unhanding her and averting their eyes away because if she stayed any longer, they’d have harder times containing themselves, for all they wanted was to sit next to her, listen to her humming, watch her expression change under her thoughts, and kiss her again and anew until she dissolved into thin air right on that porch.

She was almost running from them, and even Seulgi’s face wore surprise when she passed them as the taller Velvet approached their mate. 

“Is she upset or something?” They asked, propping beside Juhyun, who leaned into them the next instant. 

“She said she was not, but I can’t tell. She’s been mysterious lately.”

“She’s still affected,” the younger mused, exhaling a heavy mass of fatigue out.

“I didn’t mean it like that, you know it,” the shorter mumbled, folding one sleeve of their shirt with the other hand. “I thought I realised it was a dream but...”

“We believe what we see. You’ve no idea how scared  _ I _ was when  _ I _ saw you there.”

“I’m sorry...”

“I know, love,” Seulgi pecked their friend’s head and grabbed their palm, resting it over their knee as they sat with crossed legs. “Don’t be harsh on her.”

“I’m… not?” They replied, unsure.

“Now that I think about it, she looked actually scared,” their fingers drew lines and circles around the elder’s palm who tensed and straightened with a worried expression growing on them.

“Why? I did nothing wrong, didn’t I? I assumed we had a moment...”

“I can’t tell why, Hyunnie, I’m not Seungwan. And I don’t think it was your doing or something,” tigerish eyes squinted in a soft, calming smile at the person next to them.

“Everything is my doing,” Juhyun mumbled, melting back into the frame beside.

“You’re such a disaster, heh...”

The shorter Velvet was about to protest and fight, but then they fell into the deep thought.

Their mate was right. No one except for Seulgi could see through them and pinpoint flaws and faults and lacunas within them. Especially when they were too self-absorbed to discriminate the intrinsic reasons for their erratic behaviours. Juhyun was of an uneven temper, and although they spent most of their life learning how to control themselves, powerful emotions and feelings easily veered them.

Seungwan was one of their levers. She was the lever Juhyun couldn’t handle. And it was dangerous because when Juhyun was losing control of one thing, they were losing control of their actions. When it happened, impulses dragged them.

They didn’t know how to cope with what they felt for her. They were terrified and enchanted at the same time, their heart drummed with sweet thick warmth that was throttling them but also they drooled over the girl, a gushing desire to ravish her till her destruction was constantly washing over the Velvet like groundswells.

Her feelings towards them overwhelmed Juhyun. Yet, they hungered for those. They fancied being buried beneath them. And they wanted to give her their heart the same way she had done with her own. 

_ Don’t push her away,  _ they instructed themselves before their attention shifted elsewhere.

Pain. Their mind was in pain. Their thoughts were jumping like crazy, overlapping with each other and refraining the raven from seeing everything crystal clear. Another lever. 

Exhausting.

“Will you stop me if I… start hurting her ever?” The elder asked quietly, a frown possessing their face.

“Yes, my love,” Seulgi sighed, eyes full of sympathy. “Yet I hope you will pour all your inner storming onto that bastard that hurt  _ you _ . And then come back to her with an open and lightened heart.”

“Are you saying you’ve found him?” Juhyun whispered, their jaw set and tight.

“Yes. When do you want to head out?”

“...Tomorrow?”

Seulgi drew in their lips, deep in thought. Then nodded tersely.

“Tomorrow. I suggest we move early in the morning.”

“Mhm,” Juhyun inhaled deeply, exhaled slowly, repeated for two bouts more. It was finally the time for them to close their dark wound.

“Now, clear your mind and go relax,” the younger stroked the leader’s wrist. 

“Okay,” Juhyun agreed, kissing the shoulder of their beloved. 

“Good night then, Baechu-ah!” 

“Stay with me.”

“Only if you won’t bite me in your dream!” Seulgi giggled, receiving a pinch to their side.

“I- Ah! How do you know everything?”

“You are me and I am you, and all that stuff.”

“I can’t stand you.”

“I can’t stand you, too.”


End file.
